I have tips after watching people retire comfortably, with extra money to give to charity and pass to heirs: 1) Have money taken out automatically so you never see it, whether a 401k before you get paid, or an automatic transfer from your bank to investments. 2) Use an index fund. Don't try to time the market with individual stocks. 3) Don't invest money in friend and family business ventures. If they knew what they were doing, they wouldn't have to come to you. 4) Automatically reinvest dividends if you can afford to. 5) Every time you get a raise, add the extra to your investments and keep living as before, with a possible nod to inflation, but inflation has been quite low in recent years. 6) Take advantage of any matching offered by an employer. 7) Although you should invest more conservatively as you age, don't just pull your money out of the market in fear. Selling when it's low is about the worst thing you can do, especially if you include taxes on the gains and IRS penalties. 8) Don't save for college until you are putting 15% of your pre-tax income into retirement vehicles. There are loans and scholarships for college, but not for retirement. 9) Do some reasonable planning using Firecalc and Vanguard's Monte Carlo simulator. These tell you how your plans would have fared historically. Investment houses have a bit of a conflict of interest in that they want you to invest as much as possible. You may not need as much as you think you need. I'm not saying this to make you invest less that you could, but to encourage those who may do nothing because they feel helpless and think there is no point in saving.

No, you need to swap it out with the Zuni Cafe Cookbook, if you don't have it already. :p I think you would enjoy it, and I'm not just saying that because it's my favorite.

My car is 14 years old so I have to put a tape dealie into the tape slot and connect that to my phone for audiobooks in the car, if I want them to come over the speaker. The radio died last month and DH showed DD how to change the fuse. It died again this month and she changed the fuse (on her own!) and that didn't fix it. Luckily I drive very little so it's not taking away too much from my listening time, but still. I need to take it in. I also have the Plantagenets audiobook, lurking around from last year. Keep meaning to get to that....

Check the Hunter Douglas designer screen shades. The web site seems to be down for me so I can't give you a link. HD is nice quality.

We finally joined a private library. I felt a bit guilty, but it is in SF so we will definitely be using our local libraries the most. We wanted access to the events, classes, book groups, and database access more than the actual reading materials, plus DH often has time in the area between meetings and would love a quiet place to read or work without having to jostle for room at an overcrowded cafe. The children are excited too because they have a robust chess program. If you live in the area, check out the Mechanics' Library and Chess Room. Anyone else belong to a private library?

That would be great! I'm not as fast as you so I probably won't be done until March. I've got 5 books going right now so I need to whittle down, then it will take me a couple of weeks to read The Swerve. Although you've tempted me into getting the audiobook instead.

Appreciated?

Speaking of group buying... My parents' mosque, having to deal with not having enough cemeteries that could hold Islamic-style burials in the 1980s, bought a large section of a cemetery and got a good deal on the plots en masse. (They wanted to bury people facing Mecca, for example, and without coffins or cement liners.) They then sold the plots to individuals/families for more than they bought them for, as a sort of fundraising venture for the mosque, but for less than they would have cost individually. Perhaps people who are active in religious organizations might want to look into a group buy. I think it makes it easier on people when they also feel they are helping their religious organization raise funds as a group, not just focusing on their individual mortality. It worked out really well and I think many children of those people, including me, are relieved to know that we know exactly where my parents plan to be buried and that it's paid for. Of course there will be other expenses, but it's nice to know this is handled. As an aside, they purchased 4 plots, so they included me and my brother. I think they may have been in some denial we would grow up, get married, and move away! But I like having those 2 extra plots available so we can donate them if needed.

I know my reading of It as a young teen contributed to my current fear of drains. I really dislike dealing with them if they are broken, when I lean over to wash my face or spit out toothpaste I shut my eyes, etc. I also have a weird fear of clowns now. I think an entire generation was scarred by this book in the same way the previous generation was scared of showers after watching Psycho.

My family and I thank you for saving me from more research down (yet another) another rabbit trail. ;) Thank you Jane! I'm looking forward to reading the book.

I finished On the Nature of Things (De rerun natura), an epic poem about Epicureanism. It was really interesting to read and it made me realize how much can be gleaned from simple observation of daily phenomenon. Lucretius, the author, we now know was wrong on many ideas, but it was a bit shocking exactly how modern and correct he was much of the time, particularly about atomism, which later fell out of favor for far too long. I also was able to learn a lot more about Epicureanism, about which I knew very little, previously. At some point this year I'd like to read The Swerve: How the World Became Modern. An excerpt from the Wikipedia page for the book: For a shorter version, there's a good article (The Answer Man) about Lucretius and the history of the poem in the August 8, 2011 issue of The New Yorker by Stephen Greenblatt, the author of The Swerve.

When I was in high school I was in marching band and started counting my steps. During those same years I also started hiking and in steep sections I would count my steps. ("I'll rest after 100 steps." or " I'll do 50 steps, then 49, then 48, and it will get easier.") Now I count my steps anytime I'm walking longer than maybe 25 meters or so. I like to guess and am happy when I'm right. For example, I'll think, "This is an 18." This means 18+17+16...+1. I also do this with time if I'm waiting for something, although I'm not necessarily counting once/second or whatever. :leaving: <----- I estimate 5 bounces here. I guess (same as the steps) how many up arrows, down arrows, or space bars it will take me to read long documents or web pages. I also sometimes count down remaining pages in a book this way. I also add up all the numbers on license plates when I'm stuck in traffic. Born to count, I guess. :laugh:

I like watching football and go to an annual get together for the Super Bowl. However, I did make a massive Costco run during Game 7 of the 2014 World Series, when the SF Giants (local team) were playing. I figured it would be a good time to go. That place was almost empty, and the employees were mostly watching the game on those giant TVs they sell. They had even tilted them towards the registers for those folks. :D

Daijobu, you probably shouldn't copy the entire article here for copyright reasons. Maybe a paragraph or brief description and then a link? Reading the article, I don't see them talking about a certain accreditation that matters for engineering programs. I'm sorry I can't remember what it is, but maybe someone else can add it. I think that's also considered a factor when deciding which program to attend.

Just curious, is the flight this Sunday? I have seem some strange things happen with flights on Superbowl Sunday. "Bad hours" become "during the game" instead of really early or really late.

:grouphug:

I am another person which is reading more books that I would like at once. I didn't finish any books this week as my efforts were spread quite thin. On the Nature of Things (De Rerum Natura) is going quite well and if I weren't so tired I might have finished tonight. A Confederacy of Dunces continues to entertain and make me laugh out loud in public. I've resigned myself to reading it at home to avoid drawing glances. I continue to make progress on House of Leaves. It's slow going, but I love this post-modern horror story. I'm almost done with Grain Brain. I know most of the info in it already, but there have been a few interesting tidbits. DH stopped by the library and picked up my held copy of Passage to India so I think I'll start after finishing Lucretius. I'm about half way through The Buried Book. (Thanks again, Eliana!) The story of the discovery of the Epic of Gilgamesh is really fascinating. The book discusses how a local Iraqi archeologist, Hormuzd Rassam, had credit taken from him for his discoveries during his lifetime. He wrote several books, one of which is Asshur and the Land of Nimrod, of which I found Google-digitaized version of Harvard's copy online. I'll just copy a bit of the story of the lack of archeological credit related in The Buried Book because I was reminded of it when Jane mentioned above the colonial British idea of superiority. ------- Feel better soon! I rather like the lack of punctuation because it makes everything so consistent and spare. But I do sympathize, as one of my biggest pet peeves is found in the same book: people using "of" in stead of "'ve" as in "I could of gone." I know it's a style, but it practically makes my eye start twitching. Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman is a great book! Paraphrasing: "I would like a map of a cat, please." "You mean an anatomical diagram?" "Yes."

It will definitely stain unless you only cook white foods. (Creamed turnips, anyone?)

Good job, mama! It's not petty at all. I would have a hard time with it too. :grouphug: Lots of good suggestions here for how to think or talk about it.

I liked your post, but as a sign of support. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

You can do it! :hurray:

I kind of agree, but I do thing SAHMs are looked down upon more in Scandinavian countries than they are in the U.S., so while there's a nice opportunity for extended leave when children join the family, the expectation that the woman will re-join the workforce seems stronger there.

Thanks for linking to your comments here and the link to the goodreads review. Not having read the book, this sounds like the kind of book written by someone who has a narrow view of groups in the U.S., a weaker grasp on the history of the U.S. pre-1950, and of world history in general. Maybe that's okay, as it's not a bad idea to have someone forward thinking point to other parts of the globe and asking why we're not doing something possibly as beneficial, but based on your reviews she sounds dismissive. While I would absolutely support a year off for family leave after birth/adoption, I'm not sure the effects would be what she wants because part of having everyone working is cultural, not just legislative, and people in the U.S. may be too individualistic for that. It may result in even more people deciding to stay home or do alternative work, if they are given a chance to spend a year bonding with their children. I would like that, but I'm not sure she would.

The other problem with moving is visitation. If someone lives in a high COL area, divorces, and receives half the proceeds from the sale of an expensive home, they could have a decent quality of life in a lower COL area. But if there are visitation agreements or one spouse wants to stop the other from moving with the children, it's a lot more difficult.

That wasn't my takeaway at all. I was responding directly to what you were saying about people having to offset the costs of working with needing to pay for childcare. I would not consider it the height of irresponsibility for someone to prioritize needs over maybes. I hope that wasn't the take away from my posts. We almost always agree with each other so I'm going to decide my communication is off kilter today and leave it at that. I do believe we are talking past each other. :grouphug: