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Need advice from seasoned ballet moms...


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I have a few questions for more seasoned ballet moms.

 

We are struggling with our current studio. It is almost so small that everyone is watching everyone else and wondering, "Who is the best of the five girls?"

 

Can a studio be so small that it is unhealthy, and promotes too much comparison?

 

We want to leave and try a new studio, but I'm thinking that the same problems might be present at any studio we try.

 

Also, I heard that they wanted to retain one certain student, so they offered her a nice discount. Is that common? Or is that also a result of having a small studio that is trying to grow?

 

Is it common for teachers to give more information to certain ballet moms and not others, so that the ones left out always feel like they missed an important meeting?

 

Do your instructors give you helpful feedback on your child?

 

Thanks for your help in advance. My dd lives for ballet, but she is getting so discouraged.

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How old is your dd? Our studio sounds much larger than yours. There are probably 15 girls in the smallest classes.

 

My 12yo dd started dancing when she was 2. While at her level it is competitive, the girls all seem to be kind to each other and the teachers are respectful of the girls, the parents, etc. and do not show favoratism.

 

Our studio is home of a ballet and jazz company for our city. When the girls are 9yo they can try out for the preparatory company, and the senior ballet or jazz company at 13. Those ages are according to our state's rules re: company dance. Professional judges are brought in for the try-outs and know the girls only by a number they wear on their leo.

 

I would look for a larger, more professional studio. Finding the right studio/teachers can make all the difference in your dd's dance experience. Pettiness among the girls would not be tolerated at our studio. They are taught to encourage and help one another. Their teachers are good examples.

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I have a few questions for more seasoned ballet moms.

 

We are struggling with our current studio. It is almost so small that everyone is watching everyone else and wondering, "Who is the best of the five girls?"

 

Can a studio be so small that it is unhealthy, and promotes too much comparison?

 

We want to leave and try a new studio, but I'm thinking that the same problems might be present at any studio we try.

 

Also, I heard that they wanted to retain one certain student, so they offered her a nice discount. Is that common? Or is that also a result of having a small studio that is trying to grow?

 

Is it common for teachers to give more information to certain ballet moms and not others, so that the ones left out always feel like they missed an important meeting?

 

Do your instructors give you helpful feedback on your child?

 

Thanks for your help in advance. My dd lives for ballet, but she is getting so discouraged.

 

I only have a minute - so here goes -

 

Your studio sounds very, very small, but I don't know what level your daughter is dancing at. Is it a ballet school or a dance school? There actually is a difference.

 

Ballet - at advanced levels - does indeed promote comparison. It's very rare to find that NOT to be the case. But a studio of 5? How long has it been operational?

 

Some studios will give "talent" scholarships to very good dancers - that's not all that unusual - and indeed may be in the studio's best interest.

 

Again, with not a whole lot of time to reply or think deeply, it sounds like you have a small studio that has some communication issues, and that it could be a negative experience from here on out. Don't be afraid to "shop around" - you may find a better fit. Ask to observe classes, talk to teachers, and talk to parents.

 

HTH!

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It does sound like it would be worth your while to consider another studio. If you want to look for another one for next year, you might want to start making phone calls now. While studios make take the summer off (or offer camps or other programs that may not have the usual instructors), many of them will let you come participate in a class as a way for you to get a feel for them, and them to pick an appropriate placement for your dancer. If you wait till summer, that may be tougher to do.

 

Now, as to what you say about your school...

 

Offering a promising student a partial scholarship is not unusual. Some schools have official scholarship forms and a fairly open process for awarding money. (For instance, our school bases scholarship money on talent, commitment to the program, and need...) And some schools simply offer scholarships at the discretion of the director and other staff. That in itself doesn't distress me much...

 

But yes, all parents should have the same level of information available to them about what's going on at the school, upcoming events, progress... As with any organization, more involved parents will likely have a better understanding, and some things may fall through the cracks. But you seem to think it's more than that? An issue of favoritism, perhaps? If that's true, you may well have a better experience somewhere else.

 

If you're unhappy, I think you should look elsewhere. Good studios come in all sizes -- and so do bad ones. Sometimes a really talented teacher has poor social and management skills. Sigh. And that can poison an otherwise good experience.

 

I'd starting giving other ballet schools in the area a call, and take the opportunity to sit in on a class, and perhaps strike up a conversation with some of the other parents.

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My dd is 10, and there are 6 dancers in her class including her. My 7yo's class has only 5.

 

They have been in existence for about 6 years, and we have been there for 3.

 

I guess I just think that the problems we are having might be due to the small size of the studio, and that's why I asked if these are just universal problems at any ballet studio.

 

The studio is primarily ballet, with tap, jazz, and modern offered. Those classes are also small.

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My daughter is only 4, and she's been taking ballet for 6 months....so we're not an experienced dance family. But I'm pretty happy with our studio. It is small, run by one lady. In my DD's class there's about 8 girls. And then there is another preschool class on another night of the week with about the same number of girls. I would not call this a "professional" school. They are very lax and it is a very comfortable atmosphere. None of the girls from here will go on to be professionals I'm sure.....but that's not what we were looking for in a dance class. If my daughter ever gets serious about it as she gets older and she wants to be competitive, we'll have to find another studio.

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It does sound like it would be worth your while to consider another studio. If you want to look for another one for next year, you might want to start making phone calls now. While studios make take the summer off (or offer camps or other programs that may not have the usual instructors), many of them will let you come participate in a class as a way for you to get a feel for them, and them to pick an appropriate placement for your dancer. If you wait till summer, that may be tougher to do.

 

.......

 

:iagree:

 

My dd takes ballet just for enjoyment. I HIGHLY recommed taking the summer course at a new school to get a feel. They usually last 6 weeks, and give you a chance to talk to other parents about the atmosphere at the school.

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My dd is also in her 6th year of ballet. There are some classes that are that small in our studio too, but not the comparisons of dancers (that I'm aware of).

 

What does it matter who is 'the best'? Why would moms want to discuss that? It seems weird to me....it's not a contest where there is 'a winner', is it?

 

Not meaning to be sarcastic, I'm just surprised :confused:

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My dds have been taking ballet at the same company for the past 3 1/2 years. It is much larger than the one your dd is at. For their respective levels, there are about 3-4 classes offered, each with about 10-15 girls enrolled. I have never had experiences like the ones you are talking about. I highly encourage you to seek out a new company -- a larger, well-established one in your community.

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