Is this considered the start of senilety or alzheimers?

[lynn]

My dad has started this thing just the past few months that if I call for my mom he asks what we need so I tell him and either says to call back she's busy or tries to help or she's sleeping. Which in some cases is true because she works odd hours.

 

Today I called when I knew my mother was up and dad answered I asked him to look up an address for me for I knew he'd get irritated and hand the phone to my mom. When I told my mom what has been happening she just laughs it off. It's not like we are trying to ignore him. I call once a week and have a nice long chat with him until I say something he does not agree with then he'll say goodbye. Today I talked with my sister and mentioned how odd he was about giving mom the phone and what I had to do to talk to my mom, we laughed about it for she thought he only did that to her and my niece.... is the paranoia from the above mentioned starting, he thinks we want to call to talk about him or leave him out of the loop? Anyone have experience with this? Sometimes we just need to talk to mom kwim.

[LisaKinVA]

My grandmother has dimensia -- but what you're describing doesn't sound like what she does (at least not in the early stages).

 

Usually, they can't remember small details (like did I take my pills this morning?), and the details simply get bigger (did I pay that bill? right after they complete the check...) Short-term memory problems is the best way to describe it.

 

The anger usually comes later as they progress from mild dimensia into more advanced stages.

 

I'm no expert, by any means, but this is what we have seen. Alzheimers is a version of dimensia, but instead of forgetting things short-term memory-wise, they lose short and long-term memories.

 

Maybe he's feeling a tad underappreciated? I don't know.

[Desert Rat]

It doesn't sound like a memory issue to me. It sounds like maybe he's blue about something and is on the grumpy side. Is something else going on maybe that's bothering him and it's just funneling out to this situation?

[lionfamily1999]

Maybe he's too lazy to go get her?

[lynn]

Maybe he's too lazy to go get her?

 

lol:lol: you know, could be...

[lynn]

It doesn't sound like a memory issue to me. It sounds like maybe he's blue about something and is on the grumpy side. Is something else going on maybe that's bothering him and it's just funneling out to this situation?

 

 

Although everyone has moved away and there's not so much chaos going and they say they enjoy the quiet sometimes I wonder.

[lionfamily1999]

I couldn't figure out why my dad was doing the same thing, until I was over there one day when someone called for Mom. Dad looked around, from his chair, didn't see her and told them she was out. Mom was in the back room.

 

Lol, I wouldn't worry too much, just try to be over there once when your sister calls.

[Harriet Vane]

My grandmother did have paranoia fairly early in the process. However, I am not certain as to whether or not her paranoia was specifically connected to dementia issues. I have reason to believe that she may be anemic and possibly vitamin D deficient, though she refuses to address those (and other) medical issues. I have wondered more than once if her untreated issues sparked the paranoia.

 

All of this to say maybe it's dementia. Maybe not. Maybe he doesn't want to get up. Maybe he's unhappy about something. I would not assume dementia, though, unless I also saw forgetfulness and spaciness.

 

Can you tell him what he is doing and tell him it bothers you? Sometimes bringing something right out into the open can be the best way to deal with it.

[Doran]

...was marked by paranoia and exacerbated by depression (we believe). He grew very suspicious of my mother's phone conversations, afraid she was talking about him (which, honestly, she often was, because her situation was so frustrating she needed to vent). But, his fears were not limited to the phone.

 

I'd suggest that he just wants to feel useful. Long before the dementia became profound enough to create paranoia (that was later in the game), he would often seem sad because he'd convinced himself that he had little or less value to the family. He enjoyed opportunities to be helpful, even if it was as simple as answering a question.

 

HTH,

[G5052]

I have one parent with vascular dementia and one with Parkinson's-related dementia, so I have to take everything they do and say with a grain of salt. Thankfully medication has made a huge difference with my mother (who has vascular dementia).

 

There are some many varients of the type of thing you describe including it just being an unusual coping mechanism. Frankly I'd try to get him evaluated if you can because medication can help and even stabilize. That said, getting a parent in for a neurological workup can be no small feat, believe me!

[cillakat]

My dad has started this thing just the past few months that if I call for my mom he asks what we need so I tell him and either says to call back she's busy or tries to help or she's sleeping. Which in some cases is true because she works odd hours.

 

That's not unlike what started happening with my stepdad's mom when she was in the early stages of alzheimer's. She was irritable and would say and do things that were out of character.

 

Eventually, she started accusing my mom of taking things from her house......and accusing other people of taking things and leaving things. It just went from there....

 

I'm seeing some classic dementia though in my MIL....classic forgetfulness, unusual gift buying (buying the 7 and 9 yo gifts that would be appropriate for a 2-3 yo).....

 

:(

K

[Tree House Academy]

Everyone I have known with the disease usually starts with asking the same question to the same person over and over and over in a short span of time...usually one sitting. At least this has been my experience. My grandmother did it, my husband's grandmothers did it and now his mom is starting to do it. :(