family photographs with

[gardenmom5]

43 minutes ago, Bootsie said:

DH and I have been married for over a quarter of a century.  His older children gave him a book comprised of family pictures from over that they created for his birthday.  I do not appear is a single picture in the entire book.  Spouses of aunts and uncles are included, pictures of their spouses are included, non-family members are included.  I don't know if that was intentional or not. 

Were the pictures less than 25 years old?  I'm so sorry.

Has your dh said anything to them?  like "Why isn't MY WIFE of 25 YEARS in any of these pictures?"

[Bootsie]

31 minutes ago, gardenmom5 said:

Were the pictures less than 25 years old?  I'm so sorry.

Has your dh said anything to them?  like "Why isn't MY WIFE of 25 YEARS in any of these pictures?"

Oh yes, over half of the pictures in the book were taken after DH and I married.  Pictures of our children are in the book.  I think I even too some of the pictures that appear in the book.  

I wasn't home when the book arrived.  It was sitting on our coffee table and I picked up today and looked more closely at it for the first time (and this thread was in my mind so I was probably more aware of my non-existence).  I haven't mentioned anything to DH yet, so I don't know if he has noticed.  This is in not the first time something like this has happened; I also know that they are struggling with some major issues that their mother just told them she has been lying to them about for years that is causing turmoil in their lives.  So, just quietly putting the book on the shelf while I am cleaning today will probably be best.  

[Acorn]

On 10/4/2021 at 4:31 AM, Arctic Bunny said:

My feelings are still hurt from every “family” picture I’ve been asked not to be in for the past 25 years, including at my wedding, my husband’s graduation (years after the wedding), etc.

Same here at my wedding. I let them take it and didn’t say a word while I was thinking that IF my marriage didn’t survive I didn’t think they would want to display the photo of their family wearing the wedding clothes so I might have as well been in it. 

[theelfqueen]

2 hours ago, Bootsie said:

Oh yes, over half of the pictures in the book were taken after DH and I married.  Pictures of our children are in the book.  I think I even too some of the pictures that appear in the book.  

I wasn't home when the book arrived.  It was sitting on our coffee table and I picked up today and looked more closely at it for the first time (and this thread was in my mind so I was probably more aware of my non-existence).  I haven't mentioned anything to DH yet, so I don't know if he has noticed.  This is in not the first time something like this has happened; I also know that they are struggling with some major issues that their mother just told them she has been lying to them about for years that is causing turmoil in their lives.  So, just quietly putting the book on the shelf while I am cleaning today will probably be best.  

Are you the primary picture taker in your family? Is it possible there just weren't a lot.of.pics with you IN them to choose from? 

[Bootsie]

3 minutes ago, theelfqueen said:

Are you the primary picture taker in your family? Is it possible there just weren't a lot.of.pics with you IN them to choose from? 

No, ,that isn't the case.  There were professional pictures from weddings and other family events, but none of the ones chosen were picutres I was in.

But, maybe we are just weird about pictures on our family.  DD is the serious photographer in the family.  A few years ago for Mother's day she gave me a canvas collage of pictures she had done.  It has pictures of her and her brother.  And there are pictures of a friends' two children--and then a picture of their cousins.  The collage hangs in my office and people ask about them and I have to say "I have never seen those two kids before in my life, the collage is on my office wall because DD gave it to me for Mother's day"  I get these strange looks when people realize my mother's day picture is of kids I don't even know.  

[Arctic Bunny]

8 hours ago, Acorn said:

Same here at my wedding. I let them take it and didn’t say a word while I was thinking that IF my marriage didn’t survive I didn’t think they would want to display the photo of their family wearing the wedding clothes so I might have as well been in it. 

You are so hilariously correct, and I’ve never thought of that before! But knowing them, that picture of mom dad and two sons from our wedding is in an album of “real” family pictures somewhere, lol. I hope they don’t lose it, because I think I just gave them the proof so I didn’t have it tainting the rest.