Out-of-the-box ideas for 6th grade boy

[JennyD]

DS11 had kind of a crummy 5th grade year and I am determined to do better by him in 6th grade.  He is extremely anxious (which manifests ias grouchiness/anger) and resists doing anything difficult, and of course he'd much rather be playing or being outside than doing anything school-like.   I am working on the schedule to allow him more uninterrupted time at home, which should help, but basically my goal for this year is to have him enjoy at least something about homeschooling.    

We are also going to be out of the country for the spring semester and I haven't quite figured out what he'll be doing there, so right now I'm just focusing on the fall.

Anyway, for math we are going to cautiously continue with AoPS, and he will be enrolled part-time at a private school for foreign language and religious studies.  (He also plays an instrument fairly seriously, although that's also a constant drama.) The only other thing that I really want him to do is some sort of regular writing output.  Beyond that it's wide open, as far as I'm concerned.  He does love to read and is crazy about animals, so I was thinking maybe I should put together some animal-based unit studies?  If he were my only kid I would almost certainly unschool, but I have two others and a very full schedule so I need to have some actual plans for him, and they need to include at least some writing, about something, somehow.

Any ideas?  I can't have the only grumpy 11yo boy who resists doing everything....can I?

[Farrar]

I had a grumpy, anxious 11 yo not too long ago.

My first thought is that you should drop that AoPS. Is there a reason it needs to be AoPS? I am really swayed by the AoPS philosophy that kids need to do hard math and learn to persevere through tough problems. But also, 11 is young. And I think sometimes we persuade ourselves that kids aren't learning unless it's hard when it doesn't have to be. If doing hard work keeps his anxiety level up, then is AoPS the right program for him? There are other programs that are also excellent and you can make the "hard stuff" a side thing instead of central to math all the time. Of course, I may be off as I don't know your dynamic with math - that's just my first thought.

For the other stuff... I think there are different ways to approach it. Being outside and playing is really good for kids. Not to mention that it's great for anxiety and grumpiness. I would prioritize that over schoolwork overall.

I think there are two ways to see this. One, you can try to turn outside stuff, animal stuff, nature stuff, etc. into school to meld the two. Nature studies, animal studies, etc. There are some great resources out there for that. Some of them could get him writing - he could keep a nature journal. He could do presentations about animals. There are some amazing books - I especially suggest the Scientist in the Field books. Also, all the various Attenborough documentary series are incredible.

On the other hand, sometimes taking the thing that our kids are into and turning it into school can make school harder and kill the thing they're into. So I always like to caution people. He's already got an academic commitment for two subjects. Get him writing, make sure he's reading, check off math. And then, maybe let him go. Like, maybe the best thing for him would be to have him involved in scouts or volunteering at a nature center or taking classes about outdoor survival skills or something along those lines. Just checking off school and leaving more room for non-school things that are still enriching and educational.

[ScoutTN]

No answers, but right there with you on having a hard to teach, grouchy 6th grader. 

We are unschooling science, though he will write some for it. History will be the history of American Popular music for my rock and roll boy.

Aiming for as much outside time and exercise and sleep as he can get.

Edited July 2, 2019 by ScoutTN

[Bocky]

Build Your Library has some interesting unit studies, including an 8 week study on evolution. Moving Beyond the Page has a literature unit on My Side of the Mountain co-ordinated with a biomes unit.

What about picking some literature studies with an animal theme? For example, Bravewriter's Arrow guides for My Side of the Mountain, The Wind in the Willows, Just So Stories, Redwall. 

A more unschooly approach: Sarah Janisse Brown's Funschooling Journals - she has two designed for 4 months for boys (Winter, Spring) as well as animal themed journals. 

A more writing approach: Clearwater Press Cover Story - great for 6th grade, teaching via video/streaming; your son would create his own magazine with a theme of his choice BUT this is a full year program.

[JennyD]

Thanks so much, all.

10 hours ago, Farrar said:

I had a grumpy, anxious 11 yo not too long ago.

My first thought is that you should drop that AoPS. Is there a reason it needs to be AoPS? I am really swayed by the AoPS philosophy that kids need to do hard math and learn to persevere through tough problems. But also, 11 is young. And I think sometimes we persuade ourselves that kids aren't learning unless it's hard when it doesn't have to be. If doing hard work keeps his anxiety level up, then is AoPS the right program for him? There are other programs that are also excellent and you can make the "hard stuff" a side thing instead of central to math all the time. Of course, I may be off as I don't know your dynamic with math - that's just my first thought.

For the other stuff... I think there are different ways to approach it. Being outside and playing is really good for kids. Not to mention that it's great for anxiety and grumpiness. I would prioritize that over schoolwork overall.

I think there are two ways to see this. One, you can try to turn outside stuff, animal stuff, nature stuff, etc. into school to meld the two. Nature studies, animal studies, etc. There are some great resources out there for that. Some of them could get him writing - he could keep a nature journal. He could do presentations about animals. There are some amazing books - I especially suggest the Scientist in the Field books. Also, all the various Attenborough documentary series are incredible.

On the other hand, sometimes taking the thing that our kids are into and turning it into school can make school harder and kill the thing they're into. So I always like to caution people. He's already got an academic commitment for two subjects. Get him writing, make sure he's reading, check off math. And then, maybe let him go. Like, maybe the best thing for him would be to have him involved in scouts or volunteering at a nature center or taking classes about outdoor survival skills or something along those lines. Just checking off school and leaving more room for non-school things that are still enriching and educational.

 

This is all great advice.  I have indeed considered taking a break from AoPS and am actually looking around at other math programs.  

Your caution about making everything into school is very well-taken.  The problem at the moment is that currently, "school" means math, music practice, handwriting, some language arts bookwork, and the work he does at the private school.  All of which (well, maybe not the bookwork) is very challenging and not necessarily all that engaging.  So, unsurprisingly, he doesn't like "school."  (He also insists that he doesn't want to be homeschooled, but  there is no way that I am sending him to bricks-and-mortar middle school right now.)  Part of what I'd like to accomplish is to redefine 'school' to include some more stuff that he genuinely enjoys and finds absorbing.

Edited July 3, 2019 by JennyD

[JennyD]

4 hours ago, ScoutTN said:

History will be the history of American Popular music for my rock and roll boy.

 

 

What a great idea!

[ScoutTN]

1 minute ago, JennyD said:

 

What a great idea!

I hope it turns out to be fun! I have a simple timeline and some basic books (from McKay's), several of which were suggested here. We will get plenty of library books  and watch video clips. We will do lots and lots of listening to live and recorded music. Field trips: Country Music Hall of Fame, a road trip to Memphis, a trip to a recording studio, hopefully some good local music. 

Thinking about good movies with fun rock/popular music soundtracks too. Like Remember the Titans.

So much of  the music of the late 20th century has close ties to political and cultural history, so we will be adding nicely to this past year's late modern history. (We got stuck at WW2)

[EmilyGF]

58 minutes ago, JennyD said:

Thanks so much, all.

 

This is all great advice.  I have indeed considered taking a break from AoPS and am actually looking around at other math programs.  

Your caution about making everything into school is very well-taken.  The problem at the moment is that currently, "school" means math, music practice, handwriting, some language arts bookwork, and the work he does at the private school.  All of which (well, maybe not the bookwork) is very challenging and not necessarily all that engaging.  So, unsurprisingly, he doesn't like "school."  (He also insists that he doesn't want to be homeschooled, but  there is no way that I am sending him to bricks-and-mortar middle school right now.)  Part of what I'd like to accomplish is to redefine 'school' to include some more stuff that he genuinely enjoys and finds absorbing.

My 12/13-year-old was grouchy and sad. During that year, I realized that he would say, "This is too easy" if he really meant "This isn't so hard that it makes me cry." I also realized that I was challenging him in all his subjects, and giving him extra work in subjects that were not strengths. I realized I needed to let him just work slowly and surely in the areas that were hard for him instead of pressing him on and only give that extra challenge in subjects he loved.

I would probably cut handwriting. My kids barely do handwriting after 4th grade. We also took weeks/months off between AOPS classes. See how he does in the off time. Is he happier? Then maybe try a different direction. 

We actually sent DS to school last year due to him being so sad the year before. He quit after the first quarter, but was able to keep going to first period band every morning. That walk and time outside really helped his mood. Also, since I knew we'd be sending him to high school the following year, I focused on getting him in subjects he loved at the right level and wouldn't get in school. We are a Charlotte Mason family, so that meant lots of reading about things he cared about like naturalists and nature, botany and biology, and geopolitics. I dialed him back a level in history and literature since I knew those weren't going to be favorite subjects. He'd say, "This is so easy. This is all I'm reading?" but I knew that was what he needed. I stopped any direct teaching of grammar because each time I tried, I realized he already knew what I was going to teach him, and I stopped requiring any writing output besides written narration, and he still made amazing progress. 

[JennyD]

19 hours ago, EmilyGF said:

 I realized I needed to let him just work slowly and surely in the areas that were hard for him instead of pressing him on and only give that extra challenge in subjects he loved.

 

This is very insightful, thanks.  

Part of what has been weighing DS down, I'm quite sure, has been the poor social dynamic in his class at the private school.  I had known that it wasn't great, but I did not fully grasp exactly how bad things were until literally the next-to-last day of school.  DS himself doesn't really complain about it directly -- and in fact has been asking if he could go full-time -- but now that I understand what has been going on, a lot of his behavior makes much more sense.  For a host of reasons, it doesn't make sense to pull him for the fall, but we are going to be keeping a MUCH closer eye on his situation there.  It's a real bummer, because in other years -- and for my other kids -- it's been such a nice complement to our homeschooling, but it's just not working out in his particular grade.

 

[vaquitita]

What about something like this?

http://www.historicalstoriesofsurvival.com/