We're thinking of pulling DS out of his charter high school

[Zanyan]

My son, just turned 14 this past weekend, is a freshman at a public charter high school. He's doing well in 5 out of 6 of his classes, but the 6th class (English - ds is dysgraphic) requires so much time for him to complete the work, that he's falling behind already.

 

One of the main reasons he's falling behind is because he just had open heart surgery 5 weeks ago. He's still recovering from that, but because he started school just 3 weeks after the surgery, and 2 weeks after he got out of intensive care, he pushed himself too hard, and is now home sick with bronchitis! Poor guy is trying so hard to keep up with his homework, but because he's sick, it takes him hours to finish, and he's getting more and more tired. If he was healthy, the English class would still be tough for him, but he'd have the energy he needs to push himself to succeed. Right now, he has the mental will, but his body is not cooperating!

 

My husband is ready to pull him right now. I feel more reluctance to pull him because all of his friends go to this school, and when we've mentioned pulling him out and having him try again next year, he gets upset and says that we don't believe in him and his ability to succeed. That kind of will to succeed is a trait I want to support.

 

I would love to homeschool him this year and call him a freshman, but because we do not live in the same district as the charter school, we were able to get him into that school because he'd been enrolled in a homestudy program in that district. Because of his September birthday, we could put him back in the program and call him an 8th grader again, but he is very upset about that idea - for understandable reasons.

 

Here's my husband's idea, and I wanted to see what you all thought about it. He thinks we should pull ds out of high school, but continue teaching him high school level courses. That way, next year he could start math with geometry (he's in algebra 1 right now), and whiz through the social studies, Spanish, etc. classes. Then, when he's a senior and 18 years old, he can just finish up his high school requirements at the community college instead of actually going to his senior year in high school. We do have an excellent community college here.

 

I am so torn. Of course, the number one priority is getting ds healthy. What do you all think of the idea that ds could be a "freshman" next year, but still go to college when he is 18, rather than going to his senior year in high school?

 

Sorry for the ramble - I'm feeling so emotional over this whole thing.

[Ellie]

Well, we did community college in San Jose instead of high school, so your plan sounds fine to me.

 

Hope your ds feels better soon!

[outtamyshell]

I think there is a lot to consider before you choose to pull him out, and you might want to do some more research before making a decision.

 

Will the highschool give credit for his homeschool grades? Your school/district may or may not be supportive of this. Will you have the option to send him back? Or are you considering leaving highschool for good. Choosing to bring them home is a tough decision, but it is a great option and may be a perfect fit. But don't feel like you need to rush into the decision because of his current class situation.

 

Have you thoroughly looked into the resources are available through the school? I know a family whose son had a brain tumor removed while he was in middle school. This boy has now graduated with his class because his family pushed the school hard for the proper medical exceptions/accomodations that he required. Have you talked to the school counsellor to see what they can do? They may have homestudy options available until he's ready to go back full-time. They may be able to encourage the english teacher to accept alternative assignments. Your son has a lot of rights because of the various disabilities acts that have been passed. You may have to find the proper course for your son and educate the schools. I don't share these ideas to discourage you from homeschooling, but to remind you of all of your options.

 

Don't get discouraged. You will find the right solution for your family. And the folks on this board will give you support no matter what choice you make!

 

Good Luck.

[Maverick]

This is just my opinion, so take it or leave it. ;) I think since your ds is determined to work hard and succeed at school, it would be a mistake to pull him out. Given his health issues, I'm sure his teachers would be willing to work with him and allow flexibility on some due dates. Is he willing to make a point of asking his teachers for help? I do believe that parents have the final say on what's best for their kids, even 14 year olds,:D but in this case, like you say, I would want to support his desire to stick with a difficult situation and succeed. It is an important life skill.

[Ame E.]

and leave him in the others.. Since he has health problems, and you say he is dysgraphic, would this be possible to do? Seems like the school should be able to understand this..

 

Ame

[Kareni]

Is the charter school an all or nothing situation? Would it be possible for him to do some subjects there and to do the rest (including English) at home?

 

Best wishes for his speedy recovery!

Regards,

Kareni

[Harriet Vane]

Have you thoroughly looked into the resources are available through the school? I know a family whose son had a brain tumor removed while he was in middle school. This boy has now graduated with his class because his family pushed the school hard for the proper medical exceptions/accomodations that he required. Have you talked to the school counsellor to see what they can do? They may have homestudy options available until he's ready to go back full-time. They may be able to encourage the english teacher to accept alternative assignments. Your son has a lot of rights because of the various disabilities acts that have been passed. You may have to find the proper course for your son and educate the schools. I don't share these ideas to discourage you from homeschooling, but to remind you of all of your options.

 

Good Luck.

 

:iagree:

 

Your son does have options beyond stay-or-go. The school is legally required to accommodate disabilities as well as medical conditions. Have you pursued this? If not, you should consider doing so.

[Carol in Cal.]

I have heard rumors that here in CA high school is sometimes an 'all homeschool or no homeschool' proposition--that highschools don't give kids credit for any work they do in a homeschooled setting. Now, supposedly there are ways around this, like signing up for a charter ISP and building a record with a credentialed teacher. I don't know about whether this varies from district to district, but it is something to watch out for. I know lots of people who homeschooled through high school, and many, many others who homeschooled up through 8th grade, but I don't know anyone at all who homeschooled into high school but not all the way through it.

 

The other thing I wanted to tell you is that I know someone whose children went to public schools all the way through. Her daughter had heart problems, and for her sophomore year in high school she worked with the DD's counsellor to set up a K12 independent study program through the normal high school. I believe that she went to the school once or twice a week to have her progress monitored, but this way she could really rest up and still get through her studies. She was in a very tough school district, but met all the standards that way. The next year she went back to regular school. The point? Work with your high school counsellor to see if you can figure out something together.

[Pamela H in Texas]

I agree that since you generally believe the school is a good fit for your son and family, you should find a way to keep him there. And it sounds like you have a leg to stand on, so to speak, in that schools have to provide for medical and special needs situations, both of which are in play in your situation.

 

Honestly, I had a baby in high school and they accommodated that and THAT was my own fault! Certainly a brain tumor and bronchitis can be dealt with similarly if not even better, especially in light of the dysgraphia also!

[Bev in B'ville]

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[threetreasurs]

Another option might be a different English class? Our school has several levels of English?

 

Another consideration is where you want you want your child to end up/where he wants to end up. Going to CC without finishing high school might make it difficult to get into some 4 year colleges and can affect what CC programs a student can take.

[Cindy in WA]

I wouldn't pull him out either. Since he has already started and doesn't want to quit, I believe that it would have negative effects in many ways. I especially would not call him an 8th grader. He's a young man with man pride. That would be extremely hurtful.

 

Since his health is poor at the moment, I would see if there is a way that he could be home until he recovers and get his schoolwork sent home. That way he can keep up and rest when he needs to during the day. I'm assuming that it will take multiple months to fully recover and gain a healthy immune system again, so this may be a pattern for at least part of the school year.

 

This can't be the first time the school has faced a child with a difficult illness. They must have a policy in place that doesn't require pulling him out.

HTH

Cindy

[Zanyan]

You guys are great! I feel so supported in this. Reading your posts, I felt most drawn in my mind to homeschooling my son again, but in my heart, I knew that we should try to make his high school work for him. After homeschooling him for 6 years, I can honestly say I have rarely seen him so focused on achieving academic goals as he has been thus far in high school. My husband and his family have been all for pulling our son out of high school and trying again next year. And even though I love homeschooling, and I'm daunted by the idea of him continuing in school this year, his strong desire and motivation to succeed regardless of his struggles is important to support, as many of you have pointed out. He actually said to me yesterday, "Mom. So I struggle for the first semester, and get Cs in English and maybe even Social Studies. Then I'm feeling better next semester and I get Bs, maybe even an A or two. That's worth it to me. Don't lots of people struggle in their lives, and then come through it all O.K.?" Wow.

 

So, I spoke with the principal and asked about the provisions you guys suggested with regard to assisting kids with major medical issues. The principal agreed, and we've come up with a plan that won't be too overtaxing for ds. I was concerned that he would have so much work to make up after being out sick for a week that he would constantly be trying to play catch up. The principal agreed that that would be too stressful, and so he's going to ask all his teachers to right off any tests or classroom work, and have ds start fresh when he returns. In the meantime, ds has to complete all assigned homework during the time he is out sick. When he returns, he'll be able to receive tutoring in Spanish and math, if he needs it in order to keep up with the classes. He's going to drop his English class, and "homeschool" English in a fashion. The County Office of Education has online classes for all the basic high school subjects, and ds can take the online freshman English class. He has a year to finish, and he can go at his own pace. This may end up being a blessing in disguise, since he'll be able to do all writing assignments at home on the computer, rather than having to compose in class. The school is so small, they only have one level of English for 9th and 10th - both college prep, and then they have AP or regular American Lit and senior level English. This online option is brand new this year.

 

Because the school is on block scheduling, and they do not have P.E. at school (they fulfill their P.E. commitment on their own time, and fill out P.E. logs), and one of the required electives each year is community service, he will only have 5 classes on campus, which means he'll be on campus only 16 or 17 hours a week.

 

I feel truly blessed by all the support I received here. After reading your posts, I felt confident when talking to the principal that we could work something out for my son. As my kids would say, You Rock! :D

[Carol in Cal.]

 

Because the school is on block scheduling, and they do not have P.E. at school (they fulfill their P.E. commitment on their own time, and fill out P.E. logs), and one of the required electives each year is community service, he will only have 5 classes on campus, which means he'll be on campus only 16 or 17 hours a week.

 

 

 

If so, I have some contacts there that might be helpful.

 

(Your mention of no PE caught my eye, as around here I have only heard of this from that particular charter high school.)

[Kareni]

Zanyan,

 

So glad to hear that you now have a great plan in place. It must be a relief both to you and to your son.

 

Regards,

Kareni