nevergiveup Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 That caught your attention, didn't it? I have been discussing a few things with a friend of mine and wanted to know what you ladies think. 1. Can you be really close friends with a member of the opposite sex? What if they had a spouse? 2. Do men hit on women if the woman is not interested? In other words: is the woman sending out some signal (she may not be aware of) in order to have men hit on her, or do men just try anyway? 3. Would you let your spouse go to a message therapist of the opposite sex if they were fit and attractive? I welcome all of your thoughts and please try to include why or why not reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie Smith Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 1. Yes you can be friends with people of the opposite sex. Yes, even if they have a spouse. 2. Yes men can hit on women who aren't interested, the same in reverse it true. A person can also pick up signals that aren't being given, or a person can just be 'nice' and the other person takes that as a signal. 3. Yes I would, and have. My hubby would also have no problem with the reserve. (As it happens the only male massage therapist I know personal is kind of old, odd, and wacky.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 1. Can you be really close friends with a member of the opposite sex? What if they had a spouse? Sure I've had several close friends that are men. Some with spouses some without. The spouses never had a problem with it. Probably because I was never interested in them as more than friends. 2. Do men hit on women if the woman is not interested? In other words: is the woman sending out some signal (she may not be aware of) in order to have men hit on her, or do men just try anyway? I don't think pheromones work that way. And no, men don't hit on every woman they meet. Please, let's give them a little credit. 3. Would you let your spouse go to a message therapist of the opposite sex if they were fit and attractive? I'm not the jealous type. It does no go. If he wanted to go to a massage therapist or men's club it wouldn't bother me. If dh wanted to cheat he could at any time. I'm not going to waste my energy worrying about it. (He also knows I'd skin him alive in the divorce. :coolgleamA: ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 1. Yes. Friendship doesn't mean that you have the hots for the person. 2. Men or women can hit on women who aren't interested. If they keep hitting on the person they are called stalkers. 3. I've gone to male massage therapists. My dh has gone to female massage therapists. They are professionals. The only time I would have a problem would be if they were the kind of "massage therapist" that is sometimes in the news - you know, the kind that gives special "services". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 1. Can you be really close friends with a member of the opposite sex? What if they had a spouse? Yes, and yes. However there is lots of room for problems being best friends with a member of the opposite sex when one or both of you are married. Everyone needs to be wearing their big kid underpants and be in a solid marriage/relationship for it to work. 2. Do men hit on women if the woman is not interested? In other words: is the woman sending out some signal (she may not be aware of) in order to have men hit on her, or do men just try anyway? Yes. Perception is reality and one can misread a situation. 3. Would you let your spouse go to a message therapist of the opposite sex if they were fit and attractive? I don't really give or deny permission for this sort of thing. If it made me uncomfortable I would discuss it with my spouse and hope he respects me enough to find someone else. If this is the one person who has managed to give him relief then ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ottakee Posted January 14, 2013 Share Posted January 14, 2013 That caught your attention, didn't it? I have been discussing a few things with a friend of mine and wanted to know what you ladies think. 1. Can you be really close friends with a member of the opposite sex? What if they had a spouse? I would say yes, if it is one couple being very good friends with another couple. I think it can be dangerous for a wife to become very close friends with a married man, or even a single man. We put up boundries and a hedge around our marriage to protect us from temptation. This does not mean that we can never talk to people of the opposite sex, etc. just that we save our close ties for our spouse or friends of the same gender. 2. Do men hit on women if the woman is not interested? In other words: is the woman sending out some signal (she may not be aware of) in order to have men hit on her, or do men just try anyway? Some times it does happen......but women do need to be aware of what signals they are giving out and what situations they are putting themselves into. 3. Would you let your spouse go to a message therapist of the opposite sex if they were fit and attractive? Can't really see either of us doing that but if we did we would likely take our spouse along with us. I welcome all of your thoughts and please try to include why or why not reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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