Carrie12345 Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 Anyone do this? Experiences to share? Impacts on your homeschool? Dh and I have talked about adopting (non-infants) from foster care in the distant future, but I also want to do something sooner. The only real concern I have is the possibility of short term turning into long term. I'm not exactly keen on toddlers. I'm truly only interested in infants with high expectations of quick reunification. I realize a high percentage could be drug exposed, and that's okay. Severe medical issues involving high tech medical equipment... I'm not so sure about. That's intimidating. Any other things I should think about? If we do decide to do this, we probably won't take the first steps until mid or late 2013. By then, I should have a newer van that would make adding another car seat easier than my current van. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 The reality is that infants tend to be adopted rather than reunified at higher rates than other foster children, and an important goal is minimizing the number of different placements a young child has. So short-term infant foster care as such is not a thing.The preference is to place infants in foster-adopt homes from day one, with that being their permanent home eventually if they are not reunified. Now, one thing you might be able to do is be licensed as respite care for an agency. You would be the person to temporarily care for an infant when the foster parents can't, such as if they're going out of state on a trip and can't take the baby because of visitation, etc. It's not full time and can be unpredictable, but would likely be an easier burden from a homeschooling perspective than foster care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dancingmama Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 You can also request to be an emergency placement. These are usually 1-7 days and are often late night calls when a worker can't find a longer term placement quickly. They get to know you and know that you're available at the drop of a hat to take a baby so you often have rotating babies. As for short term like months or a year, that does not happen often as Ravin said above. They try to place babies in their probable forever home as early as possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted November 27, 2012 Author Share Posted November 27, 2012 Respite is definitely something I'm thinking about. I've been reading a lot about "foster-to-adopt" becoming quite the no-no, particularly for infants, because of the need to keep reuinification the #1 focus, but it obviously makes sense to look long term when reunification is known to be unlikely. But that would be a positive, imo. I'm certainly not hoping for a run on infants whose parents can't care for them. :-) I'd just like to be available for the (hopefully) few who need it. If that's one a year for a few days or half a dozen a year for a couple of months each, it doesn't really matter to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 Oldest dd recently adopted an infant- and the baby was cared for in foster care until the mom's time to change her mind was up. The foster parents specialized in this, and both the birth parents and the adoptive parents were allowed to arrange visits. This kind of care is heartbreaking at times, but perhaps it would interest you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 In our state there is I think a 2 week waiting period during which a birth mother can change her mind about the adoption. She can ask for her baby back no questions asked. I have a friend who keeps these tiny infants during those first few weeks until the mother is fairly certain about her choice. This helps keep adoptive parents from the emotional roller coaster if a birth mom is on the fence about her decision. However, recently one baby had paternity issues causing the placement to drag out for a good long time. Eventually the foster mom adopted the baby. The child had been with her for over a year. IF the issues had been resolved prior to 1 year, she would have had the baby given to an adoptive couple. I do know that at month 8, 9, etc. she was getting very nervous, because she REALLY loved that baby, whom she'd cared for since birth. However, most of the placements (and this lady has done this for years) ended after just a few weeks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MindyD Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 I know someone that did exactly what you're describing. They'd get newborns that were placed in the system for whatever reason and take care of them for a few weeks until they were placed in a more permanent situation. She usually had a baby with her. Some of them had drug addiction issues, but you already know you'll deal with that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 What you are describing is totally possible. In our state some babies are placed in temporary homes by adoption agencies until legal issues are worked out and they are free for adoption (father does not want to sign over rights, mother not able to sign for whatever reason at birth). Look around at websites of adoption agencies in your area and see if they have something called lullaby care or temporary care and call them up to find out what that entails. We considered that, but getting new kiddos every 6 weeks or so would disrupt our schooling plans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seeker of Schole Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 Oldest dd recently adopted an infant- and the baby was cared for in foster care until the mom's time to change her mind was up. The foster parents specialized in this, and both the birth parents and the adoptive parents were allowed to arrange visits. This kind of care is heartbreaking at times, but perhaps it would interest you. This, although I would imagine it would be difficult, as emotions run high for the people visiting. When my sister put her child up for adoption, the baby went to a home like this for two weeks, then went home with her adoptive parents. It is a much needed service. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 I have a friend who is a foster mom and homeschools. Read her blog for more information and the heart string attachments: http://psalm1139mama.blogspot.com/ Oh and for most of her posts, have tissues handy. She does care for medically fragile children. She has cared for infants up through teens. It's hard on her and the kids but they feel called to do it. She has done the babies on waiting between birth and adoption, I think a week or 2. And she's had some kids a couple years. Her blog lets her emotions out and you will see the good and the bad and (in at least one case) the ugly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewe Mama Posted November 27, 2012 Share Posted November 27, 2012 DH and I were foster parents in our state. We ended up adopting Joy out of state and she was with a foster family for about 10 days after her birth, upon her release for the hospital. She could have been placed with us immediately, but we opted to have the emotional shield of the foster placement until the bio mom's revocation period was up. We received many emergency placements as foster parents. We had twin infant girls for a couple weeks while their mama decided if she wanted to place them or parent them. She needed some time to make the right decision. Some babies were with us for a couple days until they went to another relative (usually the grandparents). Simon and Theodore were foster to adopt and it was the biggest emotional roller coaster we have ever experienced. It took three years to adopt Simon and four years for Theodore. Both had been placed with us at birth. I can't tell you how many nights of sleep we lost, wondering if they were going to be reunified with their biofamily. Never again will we do foster to adopt. I don't have the stomach for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ELITEANDLOVINGIT Posted November 29, 2012 Share Posted November 29, 2012 Subbing for info. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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