Trying to change the way we eat - being met with resistance!

[GraciebytheBay]

Here too. But I would definitely make an effort to find ways to cook that would appeal to taste preferences while still meeting my menu planning goals. I sometimes compromise - e.g. if makinga pasta salad I separate out halfway and add extra ingedients to ours that dd does not like.

 

What is it that your dd does not enjoy about the way that you are now preparing food?

 

I agree and do try to appeal to her taste preferences by keeping out some of the pasta, for example, and leaving off tomatoes and/or feta cheese or keeping some chicken out of the marinade if she doesn't like it.

 

I'm not sure if there is a way to pinpoint the exact problem she has with Mediterranean food. She doesn't care for beans but will eat them if she has to. She doesn't like the strong taste of feta or goat cheese, but that's an easy fix (leave it out for her). She doesn't care for most vegetables, which I can't do anything about. She just has to keep trying them.

[The Girls' Mom]

There is hope. My dd14 is my picky eater. Just this year she has REALLY begun to branch out and eat things she wouldn't before. It started because she HAD to, but now she's very open to trying new things.

 

Just keep at it and don't offer alternatives.

[GraciebytheBay]

I'd give her the same respect that YOU would want :) ~ do you sit down to meal after meal of foods that you don't like? I know that I sure don't…and I don't expect my kids to do it either.

 

Exactly. How to find the balance between respecting her likes and dislikes AND eating healthy foods. That is the question!

 

She is a sweet girl, not a little tyrant. I hope I didn't give that impression anywhere. She certainly doesn't dictate what I make but does vocalize her disappointment when she asks what we're having for supper, then finds out it is something she doesn't like for the third night in a row. Can't say I blame her for being disappointed, but would love for her palate to change so she can have good eating habits going into the teen years.

[GraciebytheBay]

I don't think it's fair (yes, life's not fair, got it) to expect an overnight diet change. You could make something she likes, in a healthy way, and introduce sides of new foods. I would never expect a person to eat things they hate.

 

That is EXACTLY what she has said to me! And I understand - if someone kept serving me food I didn't like, I would not be happy either. I need to respect her taste without becoming a short-order cook!

[MelanieM]

I'd give her the same respect that YOU would want :) ~ do you sit down to meal after meal of foods that you don't like? I know that I sure don't…and I don't expect my kids to do it either.

 

Great point! In reading through this thread, I've come to the realization that I'm a very picky eater! Not that you'd say it to see me eat a meal, and not that I experience *needing* to be picky on a regular basis, but I'm very picky all the same. If I had to live in a house where people forced me to eat meat every day, served me something like Hamburger Helper or lamb, forced me to eat cottage cheese, or made me drink milk with my meals I'd be miserable! (Just random examples of things people eat that I find completely unpalatable.) Sometimes 'preference' for foods is called 'picky eating', but really, don't we all have our preferences? The differences is, as adults, most of us get to decide what gets served and so we choose based on our own likes/dislikes. Kids don't always have that luxury, and so they sometimes get labeled as picky just because they don't want things the rest of the family enjoys.

 

If it were just me, I would eat very differently overall. As it is now, I sometimes eat things that are not my first choice but are prepared because someone else likes them, and the same goes for my kids. Other times I eat what I really love and prepare something different for everyone else. It's all about balance, and I try to support everyone getting at least something that works for them rather than everyone eating the same thing. (And we all have very different preferences.)

 

I am (usually) completely fine with the kids choosing something other than what I've prepared for dinner, as long as the choice is a reasonable substitute. My daughter eats a lot of meals that consist of multi-grain bread, apple, raw carrots and cheese. My son's go-to substitute is a pb&j made with multi-grain bread, natural pb and local raspberry jam and a glass of milk. I figure both of these options make a pretty balanced plate, and are no less healthful than spaghetti with a tomato and meat sauce, so why not?

 

By the way, I would absolutely love to come to your house for dinner! Your menus sound amazing! :D

[GraciebytheBay]

Here's an idea. Use your dd's love of comfort food and sweet desserts to motivate her to eat stuff she doesn't like. Serve healthy Mediterranean style meals on Mondays-Thursdays. Fridays will be "Comfort Food Days"! On those days, serve your corn, potatoes, turkey sandwiches, meatloaf,and dessert; all your dd's favorites. Give your daughter a simple food group chart (starch, meat, fruits and veggies) with daily boxes in each category to check off. Start by setting the bar low, like 2 servings for fruits and veggies, 4 starches, 2 meats. If by Friday dinner, she's met he fruit/veggie quota, then she can indulge in the comfort food dinner with the rest of the family. If she is "missing" veggie/fruit servings, Friday night will instead be a "make-up" dinner, in which she will be served veggies and fruits only. She will miss the main meal and dessert.

 

 

Love it! I am getting so many great ideas! I like the no nagging idea that goes along with this.

 

Anna has never liked veggies much, although she'll eat baby carrots and broccoli happily (and potatoes, but I don't count starchy veggies as real veggies). The idea that vegetables can and should be part of the main meal and not just a lame microwaved dish of mushy canned vegetables as an obligatory addition (which would get thrown into the tupperware after supper because nobody liked them much - why would they?) is a problem for her. I don't overspice, so that is definitely not the problem.

[GraciebytheBay]

By the way, I would absolutely love to come to your house for dinner! Your menus sound amazing! :D

 

I'm sure Anna would happily give up her seat at the table a few times a week - come on over!:lol:

[GraciebytheBay]

Okay, so I'm hearing some great things:

 

1. Compromise - without making an extra meal, be sure to have a healthy side on the table that she will like.

 

2. Don't completely eliminate the "old" foods; serve them occasionally.

 

3. Do not make food into an issue.

 

4. Make sure there are healthy choices available at all times.

 

5. Keep the junk out of the house completely so it won't be a temptation (more difficult with the college boys home.)

 

6. Simplify. Buy fresh produce more often and don't have so much food in the house at one time.

 

Thank you for all your thoughts and ideas! It is helpful to see them all in one place. Sure do love these boards. :thumbup: I'll let you know how it goes.

[MelanieM]

Okay, so I'm hearing some great things:

 

1. Compromise - without making an extra meal, be sure to have a healthy side on the table that she will like.

 

2. Don't completely eliminate the "old" foods; serve them occasionally.

 

3. Do not make food into an issue.

 

4. Make sure there are healthy choices available at all times.

 

5. Keep the junk out of the house completely so it won't be a temptation (more difficult with the college boys home.)

 

6. Simplify. Buy fresh produce more often and don't have so much food in the house at one time.

 

Thank you for all your thoughts and ideas! It is helpful to see them all in one place. Sure do love these boards. :thumbup: I'll let you know how it goes.

 

I love this whole list! :D I would also add that maybe you can find healthier alternatives to the old favourites. So for example, if meatloaf is something that is well loved, then maybe adding spinach and grated carrot to the spinach would be a way to up the nutritional value without changing the meal too much. Or in the case of a hot turkey sandwich, use real turkey or chicken and a wholewheat or multi-grain bread instead of deli meat and white bread.

 

Also, if she really dislikes cooked veggies, maybe she could experiment with raw options? Two of my kids don't like cooked carrots but will eat raw baby carrots, so I offer them those instead. Hiding veggies in other dishes can also work well... zucchini or carrot bread/muffins, spinach in just about anything, grated carrot in tomato sauce or ground meat dishes, avocado in mashed potatoes (fun green potatoes!), etc. (I have veggie haters... it can be tough, and annoying! I try not to get too worked up over it, and sometimes I succeed. ;))

 

It sounds like you're an awesome mom with a great plan! Keep us posted!

[But by Grace]

Best of luck to you.

Edited May 30, 2011 by But by Grace
Trying to delete

[Joker]

We changed our diet a few years ago and dds are still getting used to things. I plan our menu in advance and I make something I know they will eat every other night. That way I don't feel bad if the night before they didn't eat great because I know they will get a decent meal the next night. I also do not keep unhealthy snacks so when they do snack its yogurt, cheese/pb with crackers, fruit or veggies. They are allowed to pick whatever they want to snack on for our family movie nights on Fridays so they don't feel deprived.

 

ETA: We've never done the you eat this or not at all thing. It hasn't hurt them and they have become much more adventurous with food this past year.

[ChandlerMom]

I love this whole list! :D I would also add that maybe you can find healthier alternatives to the old favourites. So for example, if meatloaf is something that is well loved, then maybe adding spinach and grated carrot to the spinach would be a way to up the nutritional value without changing the meal too much. Or in the case of a hot turkey sandwich, use real turkey or chicken and a wholewheat or multi-grain bread instead of deli meat and white bread.

 

Also, if she really dislikes cooked veggies, maybe she could experiment with raw options? Two of my kids don't like cooked carrots but will eat raw baby carrots, so I offer them those instead. Hiding veggies in other dishes can also work well... zucchini or carrot bread/muffins, spinach in just about anything, grated carrot in tomato sauce or ground meat dishes, avocado in mashed potatoes (fun green potatoes!), etc. (I have veggie haters... it can be tough, and annoying! I try not to get too worked up over it, and sometimes I succeed. ;))

 

It sounds like you're an awesome mom with a great plan! Keep us posted!

 

:iagree:

 

One thing I'm good at is modifying recipes to more healthy versions that taste the same. It's really not tough. :D I like the idea of comfort foods one day a week.

 

Our kids are younger, but I agree with avoiding battles over food since eating is one of the only things a kid really has 100% control over (defecating is the other :x).

 

We expect our kids to TRY everything they are served, but if dd just hates something (common with dd#2) we have *acceptable healthy* standbys OF THE SAME kind (instead of snacking later). For example, if she's missing out on the protein, after she tries what's served she can have a hard boiled egg. If it's veggies, she can have some carrot sticks or cherry tomatoes instead. We keep the standbys the same -- likable, healthy, but BORING. After a meal there's zero snacking for at least an hour or two. If they're hungry right after a meal we tell them to go drink some water.

 

I'd try to move away from cereal as a snack. :p

 

Good luck! We've definitely gone thru periods of feeling our diet is held hostage to the kiddos. Of late I've just refused to compromise our diet and instead require they try it and if they don't like it, boring simple standby options are on hand that don't require me to play short order cook!

[EthiopianFood]

Okay, so I'm hearing some great things:

 

1. Compromise - without making an extra meal, be sure to have a healthy side on the table that she will like.

 

2. Don't completely eliminate the "old" foods; serve them occasionally.

 

3. Do not make food into an issue.

 

4. Make sure there are healthy choices available at all times.

 

5. Keep the junk out of the house completely so it won't be a temptation (more difficult with the college boys home.)

 

6. Simplify. Buy fresh produce more often and don't have so much food in the house at one time.

 

Thank you for all your thoughts and ideas! It is helpful to see them all in one place. Sure do love these boards. :thumbup: I'll let you know how it goes.

 

This is a list we should ALL follow! LOL

[JeneralMom]

How are the rest of your family members reacting to the food? By this I mean are they eating with gusto or just sort of eating because they have to? I mention this because seeing family members really enjoying something is good motivation for a child (and adult) to try something new or previously unliked.

 

Example - I cannot eat fish. I literally cannot swallow it - gets into my mouth and chewed, but cannot swallow. DH, DS6, DD4 and DD2 love fish. DS7 says he cannot swallow it either, but I know he just doesn't like the taste. So, on fish nights, DS7 and I eat the side items. Last night, I made gluten-free veggie tempura (green beans, broccoli, sweet potato and onion) and then did tempura battered tilapia for the others. My fish-eaters were making such a big deal about how great it was, that DS7 wanted to see what they were talking about. He LOVED it and cannot wait for Weds (pub battered cod). I did not make a big deal out of it, nor did I make an extra meal for him.