jlmom Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 this is our first year homeschooling our daughter and every day is a battle. She never wants to do anything other than watch tv with her brother. When I'm fighting with her to do her work and she gets upset with me I start to think that maybe she'd do better in school. I wonder if I'm really doing what's best for her or if I'm homeschooling just because it's what my dh and I think is best for her. Maybe a teacher could get through to her better than I can. We switched her math curriculum because we thought that was the source of some of her frustration but the new one is no better. It's stuff she already did in kindergarten last year and she had no problems with it (simple addition--the beginning of Alpha in Math U See. We had been using Singapore and were much further ahead. I expected to sail right through Alpha). Sorry I'm rambling, it's just been a rough 2 weeks and we're all frustrated right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 :grouphug: I'm sorry for you. It's tough when they're fighting you. First thought - why is the TV on when you are trying to homeschool? Could you find something else for your ds to do, which dd is not too interested in? For example, my 3yo does easy baby puzzles when I do school with DS5; he's not interested in the puzzles because he's doing BIG BOY work and he's proud of it! Second thought - she's just 6. In some countries, 6yos aren't in school or doing much academic work at all. Maybe you could give her a little break and do more hands on/practical learning instead - a la Montessori, Steiner-Waldorf, Oak Meadow?? Finally, if you really want her to do the work you've chosen for her and she's not wanting to do it, then is it a question of disobedience? Do you feel it would be effective to discipline her in some way? Just my thoughts.. HTH some. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lionfamily1999 Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 First thought - why is the TV on when you are trying to homeschool? :iagree: We have a "no tv till school's over" rule and it has helped a great deal. Mom and Dad adhere to it as well ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 Again, about the TV. Why is it on? Can't you do school with the both of them? Also don't overwhelm her (them) with academics at this age. Some math and some reading should be all the formal academics she (they) need. Lots of read alouds, lots of imaginative play and lots of hands-on history/science. My dd was not read for math until 2nd grade. During 2nd grade she did both Alpha and Beta. Just because the state says kids of certain ages need to be in certain grades does not make it so. Work with her where she is and go forward from there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jlmom Posted January 27, 2011 Author Share Posted January 27, 2011 Thanks for the advice. I agree completely about the TV. The problem is my ds will not sit and do anything quietly. He is very needy right now and will, at most, sit for maybe 5 minutes and work on a puzzle, pattern blocks, etc. He'll sit and be read to, but I obviously can't read to him and help her at the same time. We enrolled him in preschool and that helps a lot. DD and I go to the library or a Dunkin Donuts, which she loves because it makes her feel soooo much older :) and do work while he's in school. It's the other 3 days/week that are a struggle. I don't want to neglect either of them and I feel like I'm always picking one over the other. Sometimes it is disobedience and she is punished appropriately at those times, but I think a lot of it is frustration. Usually we just take a short break so that we can each take a breather and then come back to it. Like everyone, I'm sure, we have good days and bad. Just recently the bad have outweighed the good and it's tough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FriedClams Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 I think I wouldn't worry too much about the "school" part but I'd work on behavior and obedience. First, I'd unplug the tv and set my mind that it would be "off" for children for at least a month. Maybe more. You'll be surprised with the little one how much tv affects their behavior and need for stimulation. With it off completely, I'll bet you have a much calmer, less needy child. Then we'd all sit in the same room and work on lessons. Little one can play in an area with toys and books and work on being quiet. Big one can work on lessons. At that age, lessons are really short and mostly oral anyway. Calmly, kindly, reinforce good behavior and curb that you don't want. When Little is at preschool, I'd seize the day! DD and other places are "fun" but if you need to get lessons done, then do those when the little one is gone and then do "fun" with both kids. Drop him off, head home, and have some fun getting school done. Maybe as a payoff for both kids is the library (story time is great!) and DD - not do it when you have quiet and one-on-one with your older. Lastly, I'd recommend using nap time to your advantage. Maybe 30 minutes of lessons while little one is down and then an hour of quiet time. You need your sanity too - so don't set yourself up to burn out by having the kids with you ALL the time ALL day. Enforce quiet time - it's a life saver. My kids are 8 and 9 and they still have quiet time or time when I am quiet and away in my room! Really, the season will pass. Do your phonics lessons. Do some math. And read. A TON. To both of them. Before you know it you'll be diagramming sentences and doing chemistry. Enjoy the younger years. They pass too fast. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SailorMom Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 Does your 3yo still take a nap? At age 6, school could be done in an hour (that's as long as we spent at that age) - and maybe fit it in there. Really - a 6yo will hear that TV for miles away :) As long as it is on, there will be problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sleepymommy Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 nt. When Little is at preschool, I'd seize the day! DD and other places are "fun" but if you need to get lessons done, then do those when the little one is gone and then do "fun" with both kids. Drop him off, head home, and have some fun getting school done. Maybe as a payoff for both kids is the library (story time is great!) and DD - not do it when you have quiet and one-on-one with your older. :iagree: I had a lot of similar issues with ds6 and this year I've enrolled ds4 in preschool. He goes for 3 hours ( a bit less time for us if you figure in the commute) and ds6 and I get all his schoolwork done. It's not much since he's only six, we just stick to the basics but he is a dawdler so we need to utilize all the free time wisely. If we have extra time prior to picking up his brother, he can play outside or play a game or for you this would be a good time to go to Dunkin or somewhere. It seems your younger goes to preschool 2x a week, right? I would try to get a lot done during this time. You don't have to do school with you dd 5 days a week. Maybe you could have your younger go into another room and he could watch a movie or something on your computer or portable dvd player with headphones as not to distract dd and then get one more day of schooling in with your dd. Reading can be done at night just before bed so your not taking up to much time during that day. I try to give ds6 any independent type work at the dinner table or center island while I'm cooking. That way I can answer any questions but I don't have to be right beside him. This frees up more time during the day too. If your younger goes to preschool all day twice a week then I would try to do 2 sets of lessons in the day, morning then break and lunch and then again in the afternoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawn in OH Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 If it were me, I would ban tv from 9AM to 4PM daily. I would do school during your son's naps, and on days he's at preschool. For the grade your daughter is in, school shouldn't take more than a few hours, so fitting it in during nap time shouldn't be a problem. You can also have both children sit with you for a literature lesson/story time. Not all school work has to be formal. You can have your daughter "teach" your son his abc's, counting, days of the week, etc. and count it as "school". She will think of it as more of a game than schoolwork, which may help some with the lack of interest and bad attitude. You do not need to immitate school at home. Be creative and have fun with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenniferB Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 In the younger years it's all about establishing good habits. Every day you should make it your goal to move closer in both kids to good habits. Here is an example of a day with rhythm and good habits: Get Up Morning routine (dress, make bed, brush teeth/hair, eat breakfast) School (math, writing practice) Lunch routine (eat lunch, clean up) School (phonics, history or science read aloud) Afternoon routine (quiet reading, nap or rest) Clean Up Time followed by TV Time (clean up work day, watch TV) Dinner routine (eat dinner, clean up, visit with Daddy) Bedtime routine (pajamas, bath and/or brush teeth, read a story) Go to Bed Each routine should contain some things that you want your family to do on a regular basis. The things in parenthesis are taken from our routine. Work on rhythm, routine, and good habits every day. You will soon see improvement in your trouble spots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted January 27, 2011 Share Posted January 27, 2011 Thanks for the advice. I agree completely about the TV. The problem is my ds will not sit and do anything quietly. He is very needy right now and will, at most, sit for maybe 5 minutes and work on a puzzle, pattern blocks, etc. He'll sit and be read to, but I obviously can't read to him and help her at the same time. We enrolled him in preschool and that helps a lot. DD and I go to the library or a Dunkin Donuts, which she loves because it makes her feel soooo much older :) and do work while he's in school. It's the other 3 days/week that are a struggle. I don't want to neglect either of them and I feel like I'm always picking one over the other. Sometimes it is disobedience and she is punished appropriately at those times, but I think a lot of it is frustration. Usually we just take a short break so that we can each take a breather and then come back to it. Like everyone, I'm sure, we have good days and bad. Just recently the bad have outweighed the good and it's tough. Why is he needy? Is it a phase or is it because of preschool or something else? Figure out what is going on with him and take care of it. Once you do that things will run much smoothly. I agree with the others about just shutting down the TV. I'm not one that strictly regulates screen time, but it is not on at all during school time. I'm told that boys are very often effected negatively by television and video games. Try putting your little man in your lap and giving him something to play with - blocks, cars, books, whatever works for him - then teach your dd. Make learning math facts a game. Let him play too. You'll be surprised about what he picks up and remembers. Alternately do school on the living room floor where he can sit with you and your dd but play while she does seat work. Or if you are able go outside or to the park. Let him play and let dd get some fresh air. You may not be able to read to him and help her at the same time, but you can read to the both of them then let her do seat work during naptime. 1st grade shouldn't have more than an hour or so of seat work. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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