s l o w kid making me nutty

[peacefully]

.

[Kathleen in VA]

How old is this child?

[goldberry]

My dd11 took from 9am to 11am to do SIX vocabulary words. Definitions and sentences. SIX.

 

No advice, but sympathy!

 

One of the reasons I picked our cirriculum was because it shouldn't take too long and we should still have time for extras, field trips, etc. She just expands to fill the time.

 

Sigh...

[Starr]

"Ds what are you doing?"

 

"Thinking thoughts."

 

He could never do 3 pages of math at a time!

[Kathleen in VA]

I have a slow one, too.

 

To keep my hair on my head, I've learned that I need to sit with him. Pretty much all the time. Sitting him at the table on his own and expecting a page of math (much less three!) is a recipe for much frustration.

 

:iagree:Three pages of math? Not sure what kind of math or how many problems that is, but three pages seems overwhelming. I also agree with the sitting. Depending on the age of the child, mine often needed me to sit with them to get through their work. I would have to ask questions and guide them until they finished. You may have to rethink your curriculum choices and expectations. School doesn't have to be fun but it should not be torture for child or mom. I'd need a whole bunch more info before I could give any specific advice.

 

I've definitely had those kinds of days and feel for you.:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

[AngelBee]

Maybe it is the age. My ds11 is a turtle!

[peacefully]

.

[Kathleen in VA]

Well, I don't know. Six is very, very young still - especially for a boy. You're right about the math - I've used Singapore and I know what those pages look like - that's not that much, really.

 

I'm not a rigorous homeschool mom so if I were having many days in a row like the one you've described I'd back off a lot and just try to reconnect on a non-academic level. I'd play games, cook together, do a craft or two, take a walk, read aloud, etc.

 

If you have housecleaning to do I'd enlist his help with designing a plan to conquer it and then have him help you get it done. I'd have him help plan meals and do whatever he could to help prepare them.

 

After a week or so of that kind of thing, I'd go back to work on the school stuff. I had many days when my two oldest and I battled through the day to get the schoolwork done. I can't say that I accomplished very much with that approach besides driving us all crazy. They're both graduated now and working at very good jobs. They did not suffer from us taking breaks at those frustrating times.

 

The most important thing is your relationship with your children - not the schoolwork. I realize there has to be a balance, but I'd opt for less school and more togetherness for the sake of maintaining sanity, peace and a warm, loving atmosphere in my home.

 

Do you live in a state where testing is mandatory? I know that can be stressful and can make you feel like you can't really let up at all. If that's the case, perhaps there are other ways to impart the facts that are more enjoyable for both of you. I know the Singapore Home Educator's guides offer lots of activities to do that reinforce the concepts in the workbooks. Maybe if you tried some of those - the games and hands-on kinds of things - he would learn what he needs to without the written work.

 

Wish I could be more of a help. I really do remember having days like that and looking back from this vantage point I think I could have/should have relaxed a whole lot more.

 

Here are more :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:. Hang in there!

[NanceXToo]

Six is SO young. And six with learning disabilities no less. Maybe you should try reading "Better Late Than Early" and consider holding off on doing any sort of curriculum with him for now. Or drastically cut back on your expectations for "worksheet" type stuff and keep learning interest-led and hands on and creative/fun.

 

Do I think a 6 year old with learning disabilities needs to do 12 math problems at a time? Nope. Cut down to one or two worksheets if you have to do worksheets as opposed to real life/practical applications or manipulatives.

 

Instead of "a few simple grammar exercises," do ONE simple grammar exercise a day.

 

At his age, I think school should take about 1- 1 1/2 hours.

 

And right now, he's probably feeling/sensing your frustration, and that's not good for either of you.

 

Kathleen summed up perfectly how I feel when she said: "I'm not a rigorous homeschool mom so if I were having many days in a row like the one you've described I'd back off a lot and just try to reconnect on a non-academic level. I'd play games, cook together, do a craft or two, take a walk, read aloud, etc."

 

and "The most important thing is your relationship with your children - not the schoolwork. I realize there has to be a balance, but I'd opt for less school and more togetherness for the sake of maintaining sanity, peace and a warm, loving atmosphere in my home."

 

You're frustrated with him, and you need to focus on reconnecting with him and enjoying him and having fun with him. He needs to focus on bonding with you, his vision and speech exercises, and doing a bit of learning based around his interests or on ways he works best- if you want to cover something, maybe instead of covering it with writing/worksheets for now, you can cover it with something you know he will enjoy. That might be a read aloud, a craft, a conversation, an educational show, a field trip, making a recipe together, building something, etc. And, yes, he should have LOTS AND LOTS of time to play at his age!

 

But having him sit at and work for six hours at age 6 while mom gets more and more upset/frustrated is a recipe for disaster IMHO. And when he's 10 or 12 or 16 or 21 or 40 do you think that it's going to matter whether he was made to do worksheets starting at age 6 or delaying til age 8? Whether he was made to do four worksheets when he was 6 or whether he did just 1? And when he's older and you look back on when he was 6, do you think you are going to say "I wish I had given him more worksheets back then," or "man, I'm glad I made him stick out those worksheets even if it took all day..."

 

I think you should ask yourself those questions. Me personally, I just don't think the worksheets are the most important thing right now.

[2squared]

OH MY GOD! WHY CAN'T HE JUST GET IT DONE???

 

Okay. I actually know why this kid is slow. He's got a few learning issues, but it has taken him from 9:30 to 3:30 to do some vision and speech exercises, 3 pages of math, a few very simple grammar exercises, oral spelling, a short letter, a drawing and some reading. How in the world is it humanly possible to take so bloody long???

 

:grouphug: I have a 6yo boy. He would never complete all that work. He's not ready for it. His daily work is:

 

10 minutes of reading out loud to me OR one lesson of Reading Made Easy

20 minutes of RightStart Level B

1 page of Getty Dubay Italic Level B

1 very short oral narration from CLP Nature Reader

Listen to me read aloud and participate in read aloud discussions

 

That's it. His lessons are short and effective. I think he makes more progress with shorter lessons than if things were dragging out.

[JudoMom]

I am totally happy to consider that my expectations are completely out of whack. Someone PLEASE tell me that it's my head and not my kid that is the problem here. I'd much rather think that I'm the one who needs the adjustment.

 

Ds is six. He does three pages of math because each page has four problems and huge pictures on them (Singapore Workbook 1A). I really don't believe that this is an overwhelming amount of work for him. Truly.

 

I can totally empathize with coloradoperkins. Six sentences in two hours is about the pace that my ds moves. :001_huh: (I don't actually expect my 6yo to write six sentences. I'm using that as an example).

 

And I do sit with him for most of his work. He sometimes does better if he is able to think through some of his work on his own. He tells me to go away sometimes, and I do. Other times I really do plant myself next to him, trying with All. My. Strength. to wait patiently for him to do his work. It's wearing, because I also have a 3yo daughter I would like to be with and other responsibilities to juggle. I wish I were better at helping him along, or including my daughter, or getting to my housework while homeschooling. But I'm not. I'm just slowly festering with aggravation.

 

Sorry. Normally, I think of myself as a pretty resourceful person when it comes to parenting and teaching. Right now, I'm just so sick of six-hour homeschool days — for a 6 year old! In my head, I feel like we should be done in two hours, three tops, and have plenty of time for my kid to run and play.

 

I don't know if that is realistic. I'm still venting, I guess.

 

When my oldest was about 7, he was worse than the Pokey Little Puppy and I wanted to cry. It was just awful, but the worst subject was math. Oh. My. Goodness. And it only got worse.

 

One day I decided to do school with a timer. I told him that as long as he was working, he'd only have to do math for 30 minutes (this was more than enough time for him to complete the worksheets), whether he finished the lesson or not. After a few days of this, he was finishing his lessons in a decent amount of time (he's still my slowest worker, but he's very methodical and precise--he's never had to redo something because he rushed through it). My theory is that he was watching his younger siblings play, and he'd come to the conclusion that school was going to take forever and a day and there was no way on earth that he'd ever finish anything in time to play and have fun so why even try to speed it up because he was doomed forever. Once I started using the timer and stopped lessons when it went off and it was completed in a reasonable amount of time, he realized that school could be completed before he was 106 and he'd have plenty of time to play and started speeding up his work. After awhile I phased out the timer and we moved back to doing what I thought was a reasonable amount of work per day.

 

FWIW, I don't think what you're asking of him is too much, but I tend to fall on the more rigorous side of the fence. It is probably time to rethink the approach, though. When he was 6, I dropped school completely for a few weeks to focus on my relationship with him because I was in a near constant state of frustration.

 

Oh, and Alphabet Pam (she doesn't post anymore, but boy, she's wise) would remind me when I came to the boards frustrated that he's just a little boy and he wants to please me.