s/o idiots a vent

[dragons in the flower bed]

What about when it's not your pediatrician that says school would socialize the behavioral issues out of your child, but your child's therapist? This woman has her own children in a Montessori school because she prefers an alternative structure to the typical classroom. She's always been pro-homeschooling. On our last visit, we noted that my kid has a low frustration tolerance, issues with transitions, and simply never follows directions the first time (and in a group setting doesn't even realize that directions are being given). She is pretty anti-med and was trying to come up with things that would help that were not drugs. She suggested: 1) specific vitamin supplements, 2) attendance at a typical school because "sometimes when kids are in that setting they learn to get carried along with the group all day and that smooths down the quirks and rough edges."

 

I honestly don't know what to think. Actually, I guess I think the neuropsych eval is going to come back saying Central Auditory Processing Disorder, and I know the remedy for that is not classroom attendance. But if it doesn't, if I have a normal kid with a severe lack of ability to participate in a group, might, say, summer camp, help the kid get lots of practice time in? Last time we tried this (with an art mornings-only "camp"), it was a major disaster that permanently changed my child's personality and not for the better. But the kid was only five then and now is nine.

 

What do you make of such a recommendation?

[lionfamily1999]

I think you could find plenty of group activities outside of school.

 

:grouphug:

 

It's always nice to have a therapist make you doubt yourself.

[SproutMamaK]

I think she might be on to something, but certainly not at the expense of h/s. Any regular social situation (such as summer camp, regular groups) would have the same benefit. Do you guys currently do a lot of things with a homeschool group? If that's not enough summer camp is a great idea. Whatever you choose to do, if you choose to do anything, I'd make sure you find out what her behaviour was like every day (and encourage her leaders to be open with you about it), so that if it doesn't help or turns into another art camp you can pull her before it gets bad.

[ChristusG]

I do like my DD to participate in a group sometimes. But definitely not for schooling. My DD attends Sunday School, kids church, AWANA, as well as a homeschool group on Wednesdays. That's plenty of group stuff. For her, it's more about her shyness....I hope that a group setting will help her to be a bit more independent.

 

As for the therapist, I would have just let her know that a school setting is not an option. I'd let it go this one time. If she kept pushing or bringing it up, I'd find a new therapist. My DD goes to speech therapy, as well as a therapist for her OCD/selective mutism....so I'd let it slide one time with them. Thankfully, neither therapist has ever said anything negative about it.

[jujsky]

I think some group exposure is important, but like others here have said -- you don't have to sacrifice homeschooling in order to achieve that. Summer camps, sports teams, a fun class, scouts -- any of those things are group activities that would provide the types of experiences the therapist mentioned.

[Dmmetler]

Not only that, but I'd definitely try a smaller group situation FIRST, not a whole classroom one! 30 kids at a time for a child who struggles with listening skills already is going to be tough!

 

One thing which has seemed to help some of my music students with CAPD is simple ensemble (I'm talking "hit the drum on beats 1 and 3" simple) playing, such as happens in an Orff classroom or general music class. It seems to provide an incentive for the kids to work on the skills they're learning in therapy, and they get the thrill of being part of the group and succeeding as part of the group. A good music teacher can scaffold such that the child experiences success. It may be worth considering. And in many communities, you'll find such classes available during the day for homeschoolers.

[Stacia]

Hmmm. I don't know what to make of it. It's something to ponder. Perhaps she has a point.

 

Is there a structured after-school program you could put him in? Something that meets regularly throughout the school year maybe once or twice a week? Would that provide the structure the counselor is mentioning but w/out going the school route (at least initially)? I'm thinking a school band or foreign language classes perhaps. (My dd attends a foreign language class that meets once a week during the entire school year. Each class is 2.5 hours long. It is a regular classroom environment.) It would be good to try something like that which isn't just for hsers. Just my perspective & in my experience, lots of classes for hsers are led by other hsing moms or w/ a lot of input from the moms, & (imo) that means the classes are less structured & a bit more free-form (as well as the kids being more used to freedom/not always following instructions) -- not sure I've written that well & I'm not saying that in a bad way. Just saying that I think classes for hsers are a different feel from a traditional classroom & that both the teacher & the students in a traditional classroom have a different vibe. If the counselor is suggesting a structured environment of a traditional classroom, I'd at least try to find a class of some sort that is after-school (so that at least half of the kids in there are ones that attend public or private school & are comfortable in that vibe/style of classroom) & a teacher who doesn't just cater to hsers. (Hope I expressed my point clearly enough & that people don't twist my words.)

 

Not sure about the summer camp idea if that wasn't so great last time. Some camps are great, but some are really just a free-for-all, lol. Plus, they're usually only a week & it's not like the kids or teacher have much time to get to know each other, get used to a 'regular' routine, etc.... Is he interested in a summer camp? Is there a specific area of interest that you could find a summer camp for? (I'm trying to make ds branch out a bit & take a camp because he can be a homebody. I found a camp that would be very appealing to him -- video game programming -- and now he's really happy about the idea.) I think if you found a camp that was very specifically geared toward something he loves, it might be worth considering too.

 

:grouphug:

Edited March 19, 2010 by Stacia