Ester Maria Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 I have better and worse periods, but lately it's been a REALLY bad one. First off, I'm pregnant with our third and I'm extra moody when pregnant. Secondly, this pregnancy inevitably reminds me of home (because both girls were born in Italy and I remember all the nice details and friends I went to during that period and how it all was, etc.). I can't stand the idea that I'm not there right now. Then next, really small stuff start to get on my nerves, the kind of small stuff I usually wouldn't bother to sweat. Like, food. Or weather. Or lack of food. Lack of weather. Lack of certain flavors, lack of certain colors. Or language, that can really get me down. For example, I'm DYING to hear Italian on the street, even if it's just a dirty romanesco, a driver in a hurry swearing another driver in a lesser hurry. If I could, I would go on the first flight for Rome RIGHT NOW. As a matter of fact, if that were an option, I would force my husband to break the business contract which is still keeping us here and have us all go back to Italy. In fact I'm even willing to give up on homeschooling the girls, in this moment I'm totally okay with putting them in a good school and just being there all of us together, I just want to go back NOW. In fact I'm willing to trade my soul for a one-way ticket to Rome. Anyone else to join the club? If not today, how do you help yourself when you have weeks like these, periods like these, in which you just terribly want to go back to your old country? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 This might make it worse for some people, but I immerse myself in a little bit of Japan. I will cook family favorites. I will go out to restaurants that are as authentic as possible. I will call someone from home who speaks Japanese. I will put on a Japanese movie or music. It makes the homesickness worse in some ways but also makes it better - sort of like picking at a scab! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 I had very little problem. In most areas, I acclimatize rather quickly. It doesn't mean that I like the new area automatically, but I am able to not think much about the old area too much. This winter was not great. I would think sometimes how much I would rather be in Florida but these were quick thoughts and not all encompassing. It actually is one of the great advantages of being ADHD. We don't tend to get homesick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mabelen Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 I so sympathize with you! I usually don't feel homesick at all, I think due to the fact that my dh is not Spanish and from day one of our relationship we knew Spain would not be the right place for his career. I went into this marriage fully aware and fully accepting that Spain would be the place I would go to visit but not live in. What I am trying to say is that probably your case is worse because there is the possibility of you guys returning to Italy, but in my case I know it just won't happen, so what's the point of even thinking about it? Having said that, pregnancy is the time when I desperately miss my family and all those foods I love. My mom's lentil soup, the chirimoya fruits, the tender freshly fried fish and all those great tapas... As far as the language, I also understand although I was lucky. With my first pregnancy I was living in England and working as a translator in a company where I was the head of the Spanish department, so I was immersed in Spanish from Spain, no problems there. With my second child I was already living in the US. I had work mates who were Spanish speaking and although I had no one from Spain around, it was good enough! I don't know what you could do to help... With my first child I did travel to Spain when I was 5 months pregnant and I ate at my hearts content! With my second I couldn't, I just had to put up with the homesickness. I remember at one point scouring grocery stores desperately and unsuccessfully looking for chirimoyas, rather a sorry sight! I guess depending on where you are in the US there might be some Italian American asociation where you could hang out even if it is with the old timers who still keep the language and the cuisine? Or how about looking in MeetUp for Italian groups in your area? You could also try and chat with me in Italian, I am pretty rusty but I'd be happy to. Mi piacerebbe tanto... All the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coffeefreak Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 I have better and worse periods, but lately it's been a REALLY bad one. First off, I'm pregnant with our third and I'm extra moody when pregnant. Secondly, this pregnancy inevitably reminds me of home (because both girls were born in Italy and I remember all the nice details and friends I went to during that period and how it all was, etc.). I can't stand the idea that I'm not there right now. Then next, really small stuff start to get on my nerves, the kind of small stuff I usually wouldn't bother to sweat. Like, food. Or weather. Or lack of food. Lack of weather. Lack of certain flavors, lack of certain colors. Or language, that can really get me down. For example, I'm DYING to hear Italian on the street, even if it's just a dirty romanesco, a driver in a hurry swearing another driver in a lesser hurry. If I could, I would go on the first flight for Rome RIGHT NOW. As a matter of fact, if that were an option, I would force my husband to break the business contract which is still keeping us here and have us all go back to Italy. In fact I'm even willing to give up on homeschooling the girls, in this moment I'm totally okay with putting them in a good school and just being there all of us together, I just want to go back NOW. In fact I'm willing to trade my soul for a one-way ticket to Rome. Anyone else to join the club? If not today, how do you help yourself when you have weeks like these, periods like these, in which you just terribly want to go back to your old country? :grouphug: I'm an army brat and I DESPERATELY miss Europe from time to time. I look forward to the day I can afford to take my girls to Germany and see all the places I grew up in. I'm with Jean, make yourself some Italy. I make Spatzle, Schnitzel, Brats, etc. I take out photo albums and tell my girls about my adventures. It's really therapeutic. Oh, and I watch Sesame Street in German with them on You tube :D They love that! Blessings! Dorinda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bbmom Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 Any authentic Italian restaurants near you where the owners speak Italian? Are you near any big cities where you could find an Italian restaurant that does? It might be worth the drive to try-just for the familiar smells, food, and language. I also think the meetup group is a great idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 Congratulations on the new baby! I hadn't realized that from the posts of yours that I've read before. I can see how having the new baby under such totally different circumstances would bring up a lot of homesickness... But as for the baby itself, how delightful! One thing a friend of mine did was go out and get some sort of special satellite package so that she could get Brazilian soap operas on tv. She really *wasn't* a soap-opera-watching woman most of the time, but she really needed to hear Portuguese outside her own head. ... Maybe it would be possible to get movies, television, lectures, books on tape... Something? I really am sorry. I've never been outside of the US for more than about three months at a time, so nothing like being a true expat... But even moving from one side of the country to the other can be tough. I'm sure this is so much harder for you. I wish I could offer help, but I'll give sympathy where I can... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
masterpiece Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 :grouphug: :grouphug: Homesickness is so hard to deal with partly because the people around you often just don't understand what you're going through. I remember when I was in the US and I showed people pictures of what it's like here, on occasion some would kind of feel like I was kind of looking down on them and say things like, "well, there are some really beautiful places here in the States, too." Of course I already knew that; I was only trying to share a bit of my heartache with them, but they didn't understand me. Sometimes it was (and still is) good for me to spend time with people from other countries, even if they're from a totally different part of the planet, because at least we share the bond of coming from somewhere (or various somewheres) other than "here". Another thing that I do when I need to is spend way too much time on sites like Orbitz. You never know when a good deal will come up :D. Could you get away for just a week or two? I know all too well that it's not always possible, but it might be worth a check. Hang in there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted February 27, 2010 Share Posted February 27, 2010 I cannot say I was ever homesick but I do order DVDs in my native language and watch them for 2 reasons - just to hear it again and also to keep myself fluent. Don't know if this would make it worse for you or better. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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