What does "deschooling" look like?

[Xuzi]

So in all of the homeschooling books I've read thus far, "deschooling" has been touted quiet often as a "MUST DO!" when pulling kids out of PS to homeschool.

 

But none of them describe exactly what it IS! :001_huh: Is it just doing absolutely nothing achedemically related for a while? Is it only doing the "fun stuff" for a while? (like science experiments and field trips?) And how do you know when your kids have been sufficiently "deschooled"? And what changes occur in the kids during that time that makes them more receptive to homeschooling instruction? Is it truely difficult for kids to go straight from PS to HS without a "deschooling" break?

[johnandtinagilbert]

Its getting rid of the absolute structure of the ps classroom. Structure can be your friend, but rigidity is often confused with structure. Here are a few examples.

 

Read on the couch sometimes -- you don't have to read in a chair, at a desk.

 

Practice math drills aloud -- they don't have to be in a workbook or worksheet.

 

You don't have to do the pledge or a moment of silence.

 

Lunch can be when you're hungry.

 

You don't have to use textbooks -- but you can!

 

Just for starters, you may wear pjs for a time.

 

Snuggle and read aloud.

 

Enjoy a walk through the park for PE...you don't need organized PE every day!

 

These are small things. Mostly, it is the mental digression of, "THis is how it was when I'm was in school, so we should do it that way." Nope. Do what works...there are more models to choose from than public school.

 

HTH.

[HSMom2One]

Gosh, it seems that we've been unschooling and didn't even know it! :lol:

 

Blessings,

Lucinda

[Starr]

When children are young I don't think it's really a problem. Mom just needs to think outside the box.

[Melinda in VT]

When children are young I don't think it's really a problem. Mom just needs to think outside the box.

 

:iagree: It looks like your oldest is 5?

 

I wouldn't imagine you'd need much deschooling.

[elizabeth]

I always thought this sounded like edubabble...I think it is easier and better for the child , if they are not being pulled as an emergency situation to have the school area , materials etc all ready to go with no gap between. That sends a message that the discussion regarding school is over, you are on a course to accomplish great things and most importantly , the parents are ready, prepared , committed and they know what they are doing. I think the child can relax and let the parent steer the ship so to speak. Some sort of transition serves only to confuse and muddy the waters regarding the new role of educational leader as well as parent. YMMV though. My dd was so glad to be released from learning nothing whatsoever to actually acquiring new knowledge daily that it was a breeze to transition. It was deliverance from misery as far as my child was concerned.

We simply arranged an early am meeting with teacher and principal , left dd at home that morning playing in her room. I returned home by 8:45 am having had the meeting to declare dd last day was yesterday. Dd had a lovely big plastic bin loaded with books, art supplies etc and a little desk hidden in the back of our dining room. School started that day at 9 am. Nearly 8 years have passed like a flash. I firmly believe that if the child senses and sees organization, materials and that the parents are full speed ahead from the outset it is clear that they are in a secure place, that someone does know what they are doing and the child can relax knowing that they are in capable, loving hands.

[keptwoman]

When I have heard deschooling recommended it has been described as doing nothing except following your childs interests, no formal learning at all.

I agree with Elizabeth, I believe it to be bunk in regard to every child needing it.

I launched immediately into using curricula that I had purchased. My feeling was that if I let him cruise for a while it would be hard to ever get him doing bookwork again. I wanted him to understand that homeschooling involved maths too. I have a friend who pulled her DS from school, and after a period of deschooling has had a dreadful time getting him to want to work again. I'm very glad I followed my instincts and DIDNT deschool regardless of the cacaphony of people telling me I should.

[Xuzi]

When I have heard deschooling recommended it has been described as doing nothing except following your childs interests, no formal learning at all.

I agree with Elizabeth, I believe it to be bunk in regard to every child needing it.

I launched immediately into using curricula that I had purchased. My feeling was that if I let him cruise for a while it would be hard to ever get him doing bookwork again. I wanted him to understand that homeschooling involved maths too. I have a friend who pulled her DS from school, and after a period of deschooling has had a dreadful time getting him to want to work again. I'm very glad I followed my instincts and DIDNT deschool regardless of the cacaphony of people telling me I should.

This is what I'm leaning towards as well, even doing "school" over my child's summer break (although perhaps on a lighter schedual, maybe just reading/phonics and math at first? with a little bit of science mixed in). I feel like I would rather catch the momentum of "school learning" that she's already built up, than let it lag and then try to introduce her to a whole new "system" of learning cold turkey.

[angela in ohio]

I always thought this sounded like edubabble...I think it is easier and better for the child , if they are not being pulled as an emergency situation to have the school area , materials etc all ready to go with no gap between. That sends a message that the discussion regarding school is over, you are on a course to accomplish great things and most importantly , the parents are ready, prepared , committed and they know what they are doing. I think the child can relax and let the parent steer the ship so to speak. Some sort of transition serves only to confuse and muddy the waters regarding the new role of educational leader as well as parent. YMMV though.

 

:iagree:

 

Some dc do not take well to deschooling. I think books that tout it as an absolute necessity, without consideration for the dc's experience or personality, do homeschoolers a disservice.

[Suzanne in ABQ]

I would start with one subject: something that's not too challenging, and that the child enjoys, to start getting in the habit of doing lessons at home. I would also do lots of field trips, and trips to the library, and perhaps watching educational DVDs, and stuff like that. I would get my dc involved in projects around the house, ideally projects that involve some sort of calculations or other pseudo-educational skills (building a bookcase, baking cookies, etc). Keep them busy, and engaged, and having fun.

 

Then, when things start to settle in, and child starts getting fidgety, I'd add another subject, and do those subjects for a week or so. Gradually, the academics will replace the projects and field trips.

 

They say it takes one month of deschooling for every year the child spent in school. I don't know how long your dd has been in school. And, I don't know if it ALWAYS takes that much time, but I wouldn't start beating yourself up (or your dd) until that much time has passed. Of course, summer could be incorporated into that time, so that by next fall, you'll be fully adjusted.

[cougarmom4]

For us, we started with a basic structure--kind of the absolutes that needed to get done (math, grammar, writing)...and did a lot of fun things in the afternoon. Part of our reason was to help ds see the benefits of homeschooling and how awesome it could be. As the weeks went by, we added the other parts to our plan in...history, science, logic, etc. In about a month we were up to where we wanted to be as far as our schedule & curriculum was concerned. So we didn't start Day 1 with EVERYTHING in a set schedule minute by minute...but we did work up to our ideal gradually. Then, of course, we tweaked many things, too!

 

But especially that first month, we piled on all of the great things that ds was excited about. Wii Outdoor Challenge for PE, Mark Kistler online art lessons, Building Bridges K'Nex kit for science, Memoir 44 for history, read alouds that he was excited about, afternoon play-dates with other homeschooling friends, trips to the museum, etc.

 

I agree with a previous poster that I was worried about deschooling & doing very little for fear that we wouldn't be able to motivate ds to do much afterwards. But I suppose it all depends on each specific situation, student, parent philosophy, etc.

[Guest]

My daughter went to private school -- her first time at "regular" school -- this past fall at age 13. By Thanksgiving she was home again. It was a combination of huge pressures (homework load and overemphasis on grades), sheer boredom (lots of assignments below her level), and mono, which we didn't know she had until I took her to the doctor for a check on her headaches and he ran blood tests that showed she had it.

 

I had always read that there is a rule of thumb: one month "deschooling" for every year in school, but my daughter needed FAR, FAR more, perhaps because she was still struggling with the aftermath of mono. But she also had an extreme negative emotional reaction to anything resembling schoolwork, even a science project (which she had previously loved).

 

So what deschooling meant for us was that for several months we just stopped everything. Cold. I put away the books and reassured my child she didn't have to do anything like what had gone on in school. She read frantically, nothing but Star Trek books, for about two months; she played; she rode horses. That was about it.

 

Just when I thought it would go on forever, she became more emotionally stable. When people would ask her about school she didn't burst into tears any longer. She picked up a history book (NOT a textbook) and read it. She started drawing lessons. And, realizing she didn't want to have to take algebra all over again, she decided to finish the book and have that out of her path by summer.

 

So while we do far less than we did when I previously homeschooled her, we're moving in the right direction. I am most concerned at this point about her recovering her energy and recovering from the stress and depression of a school that looked like such a good fit but turned out to be way more rigid than we suspected.

 

It just depends on the child, and the previous school experiences. I can imagine if a child asks to be homeschooled, for instance, that child being perfectly willing to start the very next morning. On the other extreme are cases like my daughter. And there are probably kids at every imaginable stage in between.