As far as being overwhelmed, having children in school is a job too! At 3 and 5, in my opinion, its easier to run your own ship and keep them at home. Otherwise, you introduce school's schedule into your life. Now you have homework, parties, and issues with teachers, other children, etc. At home, you can plan play dates with the friends you want your daughter to be with. There's so many groups to be a part of for socialization without the commitment of 35 hours of school/week.
Do what you know you are being called to do, and your mother will see.....