Please help me figure out how to move on and still be a mom present for my kids and not a hot mess. we have been homeschooling for 8 years. This year our dd(14) starts high school and wanted to go to a brick and mortar school. We said ok, tried several out, visited them, shadow days. Everything. Our ds(11) 6th grade actually went on a lot of these visits and staunchly said that he wanted to stay at home. I have kept telling him that staying home is an option and that I would keep homeschooling him. Well, the entire time we have been homeschooling, my husband has really not been into it and has wanted to send the kids to school. This has been an awful year for a variety of reasons and we are seeing a marriage counselor. This past week she suggested that we talk about what a ‘good year’ of homeschooling DS would look like for us. We were never able to even start talking about it. After much soul searching I decided in an effort to try and save my marriage and make my husband happy, I would agree to send our DS to a school (that is legally not even a school because they only meet 4 days a week for not enough weeks so technically we are still homeschooling in the letter of the law in our state) but is really a school in that except for homework, they do everything else. We have not told our DS about this change in plans (he is at summer camp) and I am dreading it. I don’t really want to send him, I have good reason to thing he is not going to want to go. I am really worried that he is going to say that I ‘lied’ to him and that this is going to wreck our relationship. I am quite worried that he is going to make mornings so miserable that I am going to have to take up jogging in the morning or something to physically remove myself from the house while ‘getting ready for school’ happens daily. It will be my DH who takes them to school on his way to work. Then, there is the logistical and other issues. I run a big for our area homeschooler field trip and specialty class type group. Almost all my ‘mom friends’ are a part of it. We could keep attending things on Friday (the day ds does not have school) but I am worried that it will be too difficult to try and have friends in both ‘worlds’. But then I worry that if schooling does not work out, then I should make an effort to keep the ties in the homeschooling community. Please help me find peace with sending my kids to school even though they don’t want to go and I wish they were not going too.

She unlocked the phone for us and nothing except silly selfies, texts between her and her two bffs, and of course the usual social media apps were found. Whew. Oh. My. Word. I am so relieved. Lots of tears all around, but I think we managed to muddle through. It was basically given to her from a friend who’s parents purchased her a new uncracked phone. They considered it ‘junk/trash’ and it didn’t even cross their mind that their child would give it away. And a big thank you you to everyone who replied, at least I know we are surely not alone in this.

In our family, we have had issues where kids don't want to get up in the morning and do what needs to be done (co-op, church, fieldtrips, playdates, etc.), because they are tired and have not got enough sleep. Screens seem to affect my kids/us and all of us make an effort to put all screens away at nine PM. So yes, if she had been reading a paper book I would have been ok with that, or playing her flute, or cleaning her room, or writing a letter for that matter. Also, we do not like screens in rooms, period. And yes, the adults in the house follow this rule as well.

***Update from OP*** She did not come asking about the missing phone, so I finally asked her where it came from. She told me that it was from a friend (who is also homeschooled since birth I know this board will wonder), and then gave an explanation about how friend didn't have a charger cord for the phone, she (friend) thought she (daughter) might have one, so friend lent it to her to charge the phone. She said this happened last week when they saw each other. The phone was not physically near us when this conversation happened, but today I plan to ask her to unlock it in front of me so that I can see what is on it. Assuming that story stays the same, then plan to go meet the mom of the friend for coffee and give the phone back to her to deal with as she pleases. I don't quite believe all aspects of this story, but I think that the bones could be believeable. This particular friend has expressed that she (DD's friend) thinks our rules are a bit strict (but talking with the mom we agreed that friend only heard daughters side, when hearing all sides it is much more reasonable) and she also has several older siblings who are young adults and I could see them letting her have 'castaway/old' phones of theirs that she then gave to our daughter. Daughter also reminded me tonight of exactly why we had been taking all screens. Last night we went to bed early and only took cellphones because we were tired it has been a busy weekend. The laptop was left in the common area. In the middle of the night I got up because I could not sleep and wanted to do a little work on the laptop . . . it was found with a dead battery on sleeping DD's bed. I looked through the history and she had been watching youtube make-up tutorials . . . sigh

We took the ‘new, not her’s, unauthorized ‘ phone last night, and it is currently at dad’s work. We are hoping that sometime today/tonight she comes and asks us about it. If not, we figure it is the ‘cooling-off’ period that we need to try and be calm and rational when we ask her about it. Unfortunately we are unable to turn off, change the password, or disable the internet that reaches our house. It is a ‘public utility’ where we are living and we would have to move to change it. This is one reason why we have been taking physical possession of all wireless devices at bedtime. At first we did not, but it soon became apparent that her friends parents were not keeping their kids off the devices and our child was getting all kinds of messages/texts/pictures from her friends until WAY late in the night. Nothing nefarious, but not a situation that we wanted going on. Thanks so much for all the replies

She is on her cell phone currently.

The location where the phone was found, makes us think that she is deliberately hiding it from us. I have no idea where the phone came from, I doubt that any friends just left it at our house if it was their working phone, that has happened in the past with phones, and it seems parents come looking for them quickly. We think it ‘might’ be an old ‘forgotten’ phone from someone, possibly. It seems to be an LG phone, the phone is cracked, and it seems to have apps installed. At our house, we have WiFi that is provided to all through the management, and from the lock screen, it looked like it was connected to the public WiFi.

We have in the past had ‘sneaking’ cell phone issues with our daughter. And we have a very strict ‘no cell phone in room’ policy. Additionally we take physical control of the cell phones overnight to charge in our bathroom (including ours) that all phones/devices are on overnight. We did not start out our parenting journey this way, but have felt like it was necessary due to the ‘sneaking’ behavior going on. So tonight my husband was in the child’s room to do some house repairs (that child knew he would be doing) and in the meantime, he discovered a newish cell phone, charged, has service, in the room. We just took it, and are now trying to decide what to do. Child has not yet been in room or anything. What would you do now as the next step???? Help, this parenting is hard work. I have no idea who it belongs too.

If you knew that the reading list for 9th grade English co-op class included: A Pioneer’s Search for an Ideal Home -Judson Oedipud the King - Sophocles Through The Gates of Splendor- Elliot Lord of the Flies - Golding Life of St Francis - Bonaventure Julius Caesar - Shakespeare Great Expectations - Dickens and Lights in the Northwest by Hannula and that this is the first English Classroom type experience your child will have had, what do you think might be a couple of good books to read/listen to this summer to ‘get ready’?

Thursday will mark the 5th day in a row of all the local public schools being closed due to weather, my kids always find out, and then all hope of doing school work is basically out the window because of attitude issues. However, it is really not 'go play in the snow' weather either. We are just trying to make it through. I am 99% certain that we are not going to be able to go to the 'already re-scheduled once' valentines exchange tomorrow either, so that is going to be fun. Goal: make it through the day without yelling or resorting to daytime drinking :-)

I think Carnival has very reasonable prices. They also allow you to bring a little bit of alcohol on board if that is something that you are interested in. You do not have to do excursions through the cruise line, and our family generally just hires a taxi and goes to the beach. On Carnival you can do pre-paid gratuities, I’m not sure about other companies. We have always driven to the cruise terminal, so I am not help on trying to find flights.

We live where it is dark and rainy in the winter. Very little snow, but can get to snow in the mountains in under an hour. It will be at a house or possibly the small fellowship hall of a church.

Our homeschool group has been having monthly teen fun night. We have had about a dozen kids come each time, so far they have mostly been ‘holiday’ based theme activities. It is a drop off event for the kids except for the mom hosting, and sometimes one or two others who have helped assist with the activities. Please help me think of a ‘theme’ for January and maybe some easy ideas. Please!

With my first - my mom was at the hospital for the labor, and we were staying with them, so yes, she was able to see dad first. With my 2nd, it was MIL we called to come watch older sister while we went to birth center by ourselves. So MIL got to see ds when he was hours old as we returned home, and then she stayed several days to help run the house before it was possible for my parents to come up. I think it just depends on a lot of factors, physical location and general closeness or relationship aside.

I have now managed to read the first 90 pages of The Language of God - I think I am probably going to attempt to assign this instead, and try to not skip the strand. I have seen a Janice VanCleave book suggested as an alternative, and did actually buy that instead, but actually have not had a chance to look at it yet. Lol, I have been too busy stressing out over the science books and trying to come up with a workable plan for our family. I can not decide, I will probably read aloud whichever book is ‘less likely’ to get done. I have read The Golden Goblet before, and really liked it actually, so I think we could easily talk about it. We are also doing a few other classes with reading in addition to BYL. We also do quite a few audio books in the car, so I can see us doing that as well instead of reading some of the books. We are not starting until after Labor Day either. It seems like a lot of weeks worth of work. I can’t see us finishing it as planned out. This is also our first year trying a planned out package though. And it was specifically requested by my student, so I hope it works out.

We are, this is the first time trying it out. I have finished reading the Reality of Magic and will definitely not be using it, if my kids want to read it and talk about it, fine, but I am not going to assign it. I just picked up The Language of God from the library today but have not had a chance to start it. I will most likely assign that instead, or simply declare it ‘easing into school’ and just not do anything with that strand until the next book is scheduled.

Thanks for the ideas! They are also scheduled to read A Short History of Nearly Everything a little later in the year. I was thinking it (this book) would be a great way to discuss issues, but it seems to me like every single paragraph would need a lengthy conversation, and while I actually agree with it on some points, the book seems to have a serious axe to grind in my mind.

Our curriculum has my 8th grader reading The Magic of Reality by Richard Dawkins basically a chapter a day for almost 3 weeks. I have now read the first 5 chapters and I am not really comfortable assigning it. I am ok with evolution, and I am ok with old earth, BUT the book just seems like it is trying to make an atheist out of the readers and we believe in the Bible. I am wondering if anyone has read it, and also other books from a creationist standpoint and has a recommendation for an alternative text? I have read It Couldn’t Just Happen but don’t want to assign that as the alternative either. Any suggestions for me?

They have them in Oregon to be sure, I have participated in several. They go much smoother with a police escort, I have been in ones both with and without.

The great wolf lodge in our neck of the woods added a huge outdoor zip line thing. I only mention this because we packed no close toed shoes and couldn’t go on it, Since it was new from the previous time we went, we didn’t know to pack them.

Thanks for the ideas and suggestions on how to go forward. Hopefully this will help!

I have a child who is sometimes very difficult to understand. I don’t think it is quite bad enough for $$$ speech therapy - but at the same time, I am starting to think it needs to be addressed is a systematic way. I can not pin-point exactly what sounds he is mid-pronouncing, it seems like sometimes he just is not enunciating his words or making an effort to communicate well. You know, making eye contact with the person, speaking loud enough to be heard, etc. I am wondering if there are any on-line resources on how to address something like this? I am not the only person who notices the difficulty in understanding his speech. Any ideas?

I think it is really pretty far from Seattle. That being said, there are some amazing trails and hikes/walks that are absolutely different from other areas. We really like the lava tubes (not weather dependent) and the tale of two forests and have seen many a toddler to adult having fun climbing through the old lava tubes. We also enjoy the trails in Lava Canyon, although have not gone very far on the ‘difficult’ trails as I found them WAY past my comfort zone, I would take toddlers on the easy trails and either not go over the bridge, or carry them across. As mentioned, Mt St Helens is actually closer to Portland, if you were going there I would stop between the two cities.

to see how it looks

It you want to offer a single class - I would suggest you do something that you are passionate about.