If your husband doesn't like yardwork now, he's probably not going to like it when it's multiplied by several acres. Try to find out what the draw of "rural" is for him. Does he want more "elbow room"? Less traffic? Fewer neighbors? Growing his own food? To start a Christmas tree farm? (Don't laugh; my DH found a tree farm for sale, and it was all he could talk about for weeks). If the draw is producing your own food/self-sufficiency, there is a lot that can be done on a suburban plot. A lot of towns allow people to keep backyard chickens for eggs. Are you close to being empty nesters or do you still have young kids? If you don't have young kids tearing up the backyard, you can have quit a nice garden that will feed you very well. My grandparents put in a well-planned garden in the backyard of their 1/8 acre property and had more veggies than they knew what to do with, (and I still had room to play when I stayed with them during the summer). We live in a rural part of our county, about 12 miles from the nearest decent grocery store, Home Depot. the post office, etc. It's not bad, but there's no quick-run-to-the-store-to-grab-that-thing-I-forgot. We also don't have any access to city services, like sewer, trash collection, etc. There's no recycling services, so if that is important to you, you'll have to figure it out on your own. You know how sometimes a town will have free bulky trash collection, or give out free mulch, or let you drop off tree branches for free? Yeah, we can't do any of those things because we are outside of the city limits, (yet I pay as much in property taxes as people that live within the city limits. Funny how that works. 😒). I have to pay extra for trash collection through a private company. My mailbox is 1/4 mile from my house. Yeah, I could walk to it, but people let their dogs run loose and there have been issues with bite incidents, so I don't walk. Likewise, I don't let DS12 ride around on a bike out here, because the dogs have chased kids on bikes before. If you have young kids or teens that like going places, you will drive a LOT if you live in a rural place. I had to work really, really hard to find social connections for my kid because we don't have a neighborhood he can tap into. Before Covid, I was driving hours and hours every week to bring him to activities just so he had a chance of meeting kids. It was fine when he was little because he was content with park days, but now that he's a middle schooler, digging a hole at the park doesn't cut it anymore. I don't regret our country living experiment, but I can honestly say it's not the life for me. Whether you'll be happy living in a rural area depends on what you and your DH are looking for. If you are outdoorsy homebodies, then you might be pretty happy in the country. If you like restaurants, museums, having easy access to stores, then you might feel really frustrated in the country.

I love my air fryer. We make chicken tenders, fries, air fried zucchini, and wannna-be sausage mcmuffins in it. Mine is used several times a week.

Don't. Just don't. This isn't even remotely close to the same thing and you know it.

The situation is unfortunate, but not unexpected. The post a lot of angry, ranting fake news about Covid. I've been expecting them to come down with it, to be honest. Now we just get to see how bad they get it.

I unplug to toaster, too. I could see one of my cats fiddling with the lever and toasting us all.

Big hit with kiddo has been an Oregon Trail electronic game, of all things. He hasn't even touched the lego kits yet. Every so often I hear him say "Doh! I died of dysentery!" Lol!

No fails here that I can see. Kiddo got a kit for making a wood marble run, but it is WAY beyond his skills. No worries; DH has been happily assembling it all day, lol. I guess 50 year olds still like toys, too. Dinner was declared delicious, even though I thought it was kind of mediocre: instant mashed potatoes, jarred gravy, box of this, can of that. It was just the 3 of us, and well...it's 2020, and I wasn't feeling it. But they loved it and are looking forward to leftovers tonight. *Shrug*

I'm pretty excited about the sparkling water maker I got for Christmas. 😄 I didn't imagine myself being this happy about fizzy water, but here I am!

My stupid cousins, who all refuse to wear masks, stay out of restaurants, do the right thing, etc all have Covid. My equally stupid aunt and uncle are driving down to Florida from NYC to visit them tomorrow. None of them plan to get vaccinated against Covid when it's available. 😒

Um, I would open those gifts on the 21st of Never. I would give it at least a week, probably 2, but I am kind of paranoid.

Coworkers! Oh, yikes! No way do I ever want my coworkers to contemplate how I might like my tEa, lol.

Oh no! Well, in a way, they made things "easy" for you. They showed your DH who they really are. Now you are cleared to never, ever deal with them again.

Wait, is this a thing? People host showers where the guests buy them...implements for brewing tEa?! "Thanks, Aunt Lucy! We'll think of you every time we..."

I don't think it's rude, but I'm not sure it's exactly polite, either.

Yes, definitely. I've made some new "Rules of Engagement" for dealing with the tricky people in the family. Like being even more hands-off with MIL. She's 100% DH's responsibility now. I will initiate and offer nothing regarding her, and only respond to specific requests that come from DH. I can still be kind and polite to her this way, without interactions going side ways. Rules of Engagement with dad: No staying overnight at his house while he is romantically involved with anyone. Too many fights and power struggles originate from staying at his house. I'll either stay with one of my sisters or get a hotel. It's a bummer, because I like staying with my dad and hanging out with him, but this will hopefully lead to more pleasant visits and less opportunities for his partners to feel insecure and angry. Or at least, I can leave if they start shouting at each other or me!

When I got married, my step-mother gave me a giant copy of Emily Post's book on etiquette as a shower gift. As I took it out of the gift bag, step-mother made a statement to the room that since I was to be married, it was time I learned to behave appropriately and with some manners. The irony of the moment went flying right over step-mothers fat head.

Thank you for this advice! I went for a drive and thought on what was REALLY bothering me. The issue is feeling like I have no control, that other people are calling the shots and I am stuck with the result of their bad decisions.

Hmm, if they are that crazy and confrontational, then they would get downgraded to greeting cards and a 2 minute "hello! Doing well? How's the weather? Ok, here's DH!" type chat on the phone. If they try to veer off into crazy town, "I am sorry to interrupt, but the pot is boiling over/the dog needs to go out/the kids need me/someone is at the door. It was good to talk to you, here's DH!". You can just remove yourself from the toxic dynamic and let DH handle his parents forever more. Your baseline duty to inlaws is to be polite. You don't have to be friends or love them or find ways to bridge gaps. You don't have to educate them on why conspiracy theories are dangerous; that's DH's responsibility.

Two years ago, my MIL contacted my father and asked him to send her photos of me as a child, so she could give them to me for Christmas. She didn't tell anyone this was her plan. I had no idea what was up until I opened the box and saw my face staring back at me. I could see some people thinking this was a sweet gesture, but my MIL and I aren't close like that. It seriously sent me into a panic when I opened the box.

What is the most truthful apology you can offer to them? Can you truthfully say something like "I am sorry we argued"? I don't think you should apologize if it isn't true, and the end result will be more bad treatment from them. Do you have to see them? Can your husband visit his parents without you being there?

Yeah, your nephew is the one getting the short end of the stick with that situation. 😞

Indeed. Merry Christmas, eh? The man is an idiot. I feel embarrassed for him. And then I feel like a jerk for feeling that way. It probably feels terrible for him to know I think he's an idiot.

They won't get married because of money. She has more money than him, and he is still paying alimony from the last divorce!

He deflects, says he doesn't recall things the way I do, says he has good reasons for why he acts the way he does, says it's different, because blah blah blah. Lately he has taken to claiming he "can't remember" because he is "too old". He absolutely can remember. He just doesn't want to acknowledge his part in a problem behavior.

No in person drama. There is some side-drama because DH and I have told all family we will not see them until we are vaccinated for covid. Now one of them isn't speaking to me and blames me for "keeping the family apart". The "final straw" for my bad mood was my dad calling me to announce he was getting engaged to his latest girlfriend. This is "wife" #5. They don't plan to legally marry, just "live in sin", as he says. My father considers himself to be Uber-Catholic and likes to lecture me on my life choices, while ignoring the raging hypocrisy of his own decisions. I am simply exhausted by it all. I am sorry for the rant.