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Everything posted by Joker

  1. We are landlords and wouldn't give anyone keys without the deposit and first month's rent. I've never taken nor given post dated checks, though.
  2. I haven't read the whole thread. I would encourage dh to read those books he wants her to read. My dh read Anne of Green Gables, Animal Farm, Watership Down, Romeo & Juliet, etc. when dds were young and they are some of their favorites still today. He took the time to read and explain. They all laughed a lot and it's something they will remember (not just the stories but the time). They've also reread many of those books over the years as they've gotten older so they get things now they didn't the first few times around.
  3. She sounds like a twelve year old. If the bedtime routine is bugging you that much, have her do most of those things before it is actually bedtime. I have one that moves slowly at night as well so she puts her pjs on, lays clothes out, etc. before she relaxes for the evening with us.
  4. Almost all teachers I know have went to college and received a degree in their interest. If they couldn't find work, they applied to teach and finished the education requirements during their first year. The original thread was mine about my oldest. She had zero desire to teach but knows she could choose to do so at a time after college. Our problem is that she feels, at the moment and only almost sixteen, that we don't have faith in her since we are pushing toward a back up plan. I do think she will mature in this area as we get closer. Honestly, I'm not overly concerned with her finding a job to support herself even with a creative writing degree. It may not be a job she wants but I do believe she would find something. We've also told both dds that times are different and it's perfectly acceptable to move back home after college and work for a few years to save up or pay off loans.
  5. We loved it! We also had a great theater group to watch with as there was lots of clapping (at beginning, end, and when old characters appeared on screen) and laughing. I knew Solo was going to die but I still was unprepared to see it and cried. We absolutely loved Finn and Rey!! We've decided we will see in in theaters at least once more while on break. We've also already used these lines a few times. "We'll use the force." "That's not how the force works."
  6. Dh's family have traced themselves back to John Rolfe. Dds think it's neat.
  7. We're are definitely suggesting she decide on something she could do to support herself while she writes.
  8. Thanks for this! I forwarded it to my dd to give her something to think about.
  9. She is applying for a summer writing program there because we've read and heard great things.
  10. We're just getting ready for this whole college thing. Oldest is a sophomore. She has her heart set on going overseas but we have been honest that it would be probably be too difficult financially. We will let her apply to her favorites but she knows she needs to look closer to home (we're in the Midwest). So, she wants to major in English or Creative Writing. She loves writing and hopes to be an author but knows she needs a backup plan. She's not yet sure what that will be yet but wants to pursue writing while in college as well. She's currently in the top 5% of her large class (almost 700 students) and is taking all Honor's and/or AP classes. She's taken the PSAT since 8th grade and I'm not really worried about test scores. She has talent and drive. I am getting overwhelmed though and this is our first time through this. I didn't go directly to college and dh's parents pretty much picked his college and he just followed along. Neither of us has experience searching out a college based on an actual interest or major. Her guidance counselor wasn't much help either. Where should we start? Does anyone have any recommendations?
  11. I really don't understand blanket statements like this. My dds have their weight, height, blood pressure, blood sugar, and cholesterol checked annually. They are very healthy and enjoy their white bread and granola bars.
  12. Yeah, my youngest teen is the healthiest of all of us. She usually has an apple every day in addition to berries and grapes in her lunch for school. We also also always keep granola bars on hand. Both of my dds are on the very slim side so I can't imagine cutting out those foods. Different diets work for different people so blanket statements about good or bad food really don't mean much. OP, I would stop pushing breakfast. I quit it in middle school and both of my dds only have something in the morning once or twice a week. I would also go back to keeping prepared fruits and veggies in the fridge. I also keep cut up cheese to go with crackers (Triscuits here) and hard boiled eggs.
  13. This is something I don't think all really get. Drugs, especially those for mental health, work differently on everyone. I can't imagine my dd being forced to take medication she is not comfortable taking. Thankfully, health providers have mostly listened to her/us when she says a drug makes her feel worse/bad/funny/etc. Maybe all aren't really listening and trying to force meds on some of these people instead of working with them to find the right medication and dosage. I have had to advocate for her sometimes in this regard but my end goal is to find something that helps her. Sometimes the professionals get caught up in thinking they know more than the patient and society definitely thinks they often know more. It is really difficult to find the right medication, dosage, and therapy to help someone. It's not a quick fix.
  14. I also want to point out that our pediatricians and psychologists/therapists feel confident in regards to what medication dd should be taking but they aren't the ones who are supposed to be doing it. Is there maybe something that could be done to consolidate the job of a psychiatrist? Her therapist and doctor know her better than her psychiatrist but the psychiatrist is the most trusted and listened to in regards to medication. Maybe we need to change that. The psychiatrist is prescribing the medication but truly talks and sees her less than other professionals. The other professionals don't seem to want to take the responsibility, though. There are children that need help and aren't getting it and that should be most important.
  15. We live in a suburb of a very large city. There are several other large cities we would drive to if care was offered. They aren't super close but not too far for the care either. My understanding has been many do not want to see pediatric patients anymore due to liability. They try to help and if/when a patient does something wrong they are blamed. I also have been led to believe the requirements necessary to see minors may be unsavory (length and debt) to many. The ones we can get in to see the soonest we would pay OOP and it is high but they are still months away. The ones that will take our insurance are scheduling very far out.
  16. We've been dealing with bad mental health care for the past year. It's ridiculous how long it takes to get into a psychiatrist or a psychologist. We recently moved and have had to take appointments with a not yet licensed therapist because that is all available at the moment. My teen wants help, has asked for help, and yet it is extremely difficult to get her that help. We finally have her a therapist but a psychiatrist is a long ways out even though her current medication isn't helping. Her pediatrician can try to change and work on the medications but it's not what dd needs. This has been the most frustrating and difficult thing I have ever been through, so I can only imagine what it's like for her and others in need. ETA: We have offered to pay cash, not use insurance, use those not on our insurance, etc. but it changes nothing. There are just not enough psychiatrists to go around.
  17. We're the ones that moved. We are now just a few minutes from my family. Dh's parents live across the country but two of his siblings moved to them as well. Good luck!
  18. This came across my news feed a bit ago. We really need to figure out why so many would stand around and do nothing? I don't get it. Who is raising these people? If it's not the parent's fault then where have we failed so spectacularly? ETA: Other article discuss the fact that the girl thought she was drugged and wasn't sure what happened. She knew something happened but wasn't sure exactly what that was.
  19. Oldest didn't read until almost 7 and youngest taught herself at 3. Youngest actually had the hardest time at ps when she attended Kindergarten (she was then home schooled until middle school). The majority of the students were not able to read well so important things, such as tests, were read aloud. She hated having to go slow for the teacher to read things. It actually affected her grades on tests because she would become so frustrated not being allowed to read the questions on her own and at her own pace so it threw her off. She had a great teacher, though, that started allowing her to do them on her own when she was informed of the issue. Youngest loved the fun part of K but was really rather bored most of the time, which is a huge reason I home schooled after that year. Dd who didn't learn until 7 is the one who loves to read the most. She was in ps for K - second grade and it wasn't much of an issue at all. Some were better readers and some were worse. Both girls entered ps again for middle school in Honor's programs and are A students, so when they learned to read didn't really affect them long term at all.
  20. My dds were home schooled through elementary school and entered ps for middle school in sixth grade. I continued to somewhat afterschool grammar. It's not really taught in ps so I continued to go through Rod & Staff but slowly and just every now and then. Oldest still goes through them for certain things here and there. I'm hands off for school work unless they ask. Oldest is in a magnet school for the arts in a writing program and often asks me to read her assignments. Both dds will ask for math help every so often. I am not hands off in regards to their schedules and teachers. This year I requested a meeting to have youngest switched to a different math course and different teacher. I usually always get what I ask for because they know I successfully home schooled, I am able to present my case clearly, and they want my dds in their schools. I have noticed in talking with other parents here that it seems they are much more involved today than when I was in school. Many order their own copies of textbooks and know everything that is going on in the classrooms. Everything is online now and I can check it daily and see what assignments are due, what's been turned in, what's late, and what's coming up. It's makes it easier to be involved.
  21. I reported or removed the few pictures I found. Only one was a celebrity picture - Anderson Cooper (it appears Slartibartfast made me do it...).
  22. I have to admit that I saw your examples as more of just normal discussion here and nothing that makes anyone upset or angry. Your third example would have frustrated me and had me shaking my head but dds and I would have shared a laugh over it and moved on. I have two great dds, 12 and 14, who are polite and kind. We talk and question a lot. I guess disobedient and argumentative mean something very different here. They have been each of those things but the examples in the OP aren't something I would label either.
  23. :( I will be sending good thoughts out for her family. I rarely ever PM anyone here but she is one that I have for questions and help with my phone. She was always so nice and helpful. Her posts were always interesting and funny - even if I didn't agree. I will miss her voice here.
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