I have been so tempted to do this. . .good thing I didn't!

[Jean in Newcastle]

Here is an article about a mom arrested for making her arguing kids get out of the car. She then drove off.

 

http://enews.earthlink.net/article/top?guid=20090421/49ed44c0_3ca6_1552620090421-44897919

 

Dh actually did have the kids bike home once from the park 3 miles away because instead of getting ready to go home like we'd asked, they had gone the other direction. But (and here is the big difference) we followed the kids very slowly in our car to make sure they were safe the whole time.

[DawnM]

She should have known better.....she works in a LAW FIRM! Sheesh!

 

Dawn

[AndyJoy]

Presumably the kids didn't know their way home? Or the mother told them something, like "I hate you" or "Don't bother coming home"? Or is this considered a dangerous area? Otherwise, I don't see the big deal with this. If they knew the way home and were being uncontrollable in the car, 3 mi. is not too long for a 10 and 12 year old to walk. My sister and I went much farther at younger ages. I kicked my 14-year-old sister and her two 13-year-old friends out of the car 1.5 miles from my home because they were screaming repeatedly while I was trying to drive (I warned them several times). At 16, My husband kicked his 9-year-old cousin out of his car (2 miles away) because the boy was intentionally damaging the door (after several warnings).

 

Edit: Ah, I missed the line about her threatening to "leave you here." It sounds like this was out of line assuming they actually believed she abandoned them and didn't just expect them to walk home.

Edited April 21, 2009 by AndyJoy

[gardening momma]

Edit: Ah, I missed the line about her threatening to "leave you here." It sounds like this was out of line assuming they actually believed she abandoned them and didn't just expect them to walk home.

She did leave them there, whether she expected them to walk home or not. I do think 3 miles is too far from home to drop 10 & 12 yr old kids off, whether they're physically capable of walking that distance or not. Driving behind them would be ok, but leaving minors by the side of the road is not ok.

[Laurie4b]

I think it depends on the kids and the community and community standards. My parents had way more responsibility and leeway to roam as kids than I did (they were routinely more than 3 miles away from home and independent at quite young ages) , and I had more than mine do. It's not a black or white issue of morality in and of itself. It needs context to determine whether it was traumatic to the children and thus in need of intervention. I think the fact that the 10 year old was essentially lost and crying and helped by a stranger was the issue. If the kids didn't know how to walk home, and obviously they didn't, that is a traumatic situation, whereas the same behavior by a mom in a rural area where the kids routinely roamed further might be appropriate--the logical consequence of not behaving appropriately in the car is that you have to switch transportation modalities to foot power. However, while CPS might appropriately document emotional abuse or neglect in this situation, unless there is a pattern of this type of behavior by this mother, an appropriate response would be counseling and monitoring of the family situation rather than taking the kids away or forbidding the mother to have contact. That is traumatic, too, and the long-term negative impact could be much greater.

[Lovedtodeath]

I would assume that my child could make it home from only 3 miles away. I would also assume that the older child would not abandon the younger one and that the experience would be good for their relationship.

 

I also agree that every situation in this case like this would be different.