bethben Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 I am reluctantly homeschooling my adopted daughter. She is pretty typical for the chaos that children who had early childhood trauma bring. I tried to get her a school situation that would allow her to be successful and couldn't find it as a lot of the schools around here with smaller classrooms are college prep. That being said, I'm doing the best I can. She has a one day a week co-op type situation that teaches Composition, history, and science. I teach her Algebra as she had to drop that class due to the pace. I am really wondering why I am going to such efforts. She forgets topics easily. What's the point? She argues/complains constantly when I teach her. I have learned how to be calm when verbally challenged. I am trying hard to survive emotionally. I can't hire a tutor because she needs help constantly and that would get so expensive. I've calculated based on people's quotes that it would be around $200 a week so she can learn algebra so she can promptly forget it. Honestly, what is the point? Also, how do I get enough credits for high school? She doesn't want other homeschool classes I try to give her. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cintinative Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 Gently, you sound so very exhausted and burned out. I just want to sit a moment with you in these ashes and acknowledge that what you are doing is so, so hard. I know this is a post about school, but can you share a bit about any therapy she is receiving for her past trauma? Do you know at this point if the learning issues are all trauma-based or if there are any other learning challenges (ADHD, dyslexia, etc.)? Do you have any support at all beyond these boards? Friends that understand and can help you on the hard days? I don't have personal experience with all this, but I have watched a friend navigate it. The trauma affected brain is just different. Learning is different. And some days it just can feel impossible. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted February 14 Author Share Posted February 14 She is receiving no therapy. She did in the past and refused to do anything the therapist suggested. She has agreed to go to OT to help with organization and anger issues, but she has already told me "it won't work". She is empowered by anger and rage. She likes it. The learning issue with math is most likely she's just bad at math - she has the ability, but get's flustered when she doesn't understand something and shuts down. We have some good days and some bad. I've found a program that is doable but when her brain isn't working, she forgets addition/subtraction math facts. When her brain is working, she can do pretty decently. Her trauma looks like ADD when she's in a large classroom with a more permissive teacher because she's scanning for threats constantly. I have a friend 1000 miles away who knows how to sit in the ashes with me. I don't have anyone close by. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cintinative Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 @Dmmetler Do you have any insight? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted February 14 Author Share Posted February 14 I just need a road map to get her through high school. Her co-op ends her senior year as most of the kids go on to dual enrollment. I feel like her senior year will be us trying to figure out how to get her to a good place where she can move out (her wish). Not sure how to give credit for that since doing the traditional English, science, etc is not going to ultimately help her the most with the trajectory she is insisting upon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 (edited) 4 hours ago, bethben said: I've calculated based on people's quotes that it would be around $200 a week so she can learn algebra so she can promptly forget it. Honestly, what is the point? Would she work with an online tutor? Two of my sons have studied math with international tutors on preply.com who charge $12-15 per hour. For calculating credits, you can use time invested rather than amount of work completed. NARHS uses a minimum of 80 hours for a credit, less than the more typical 120 hours but it meets the requirements of Maine where the school is registered. Edited February 14 by maize 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted February 14 Share Posted February 14 This may be helpful as far as planning. While this is specific to this cover school, it's a pretty standard way of looking backwards from the goal. The "Modified" path track may be what would be a good fit for your DD for mathAnd it might be that involving her in the planning would help. There are course lists that may also give you a place to start. https://homelifeacademy.com/academics/high-school/high-school-planning/ Then, if she's in agreement, look at what she wants to do where. Maybe something like Teaching Textbooks or Math U See might be a good options, or maybe Keys to Algebra or even Hands on Equations for a "Modified" or "Foundations in Algebra". After that, my favorite math course, bar none, for kids who struggle in math is Elementary Math Teaching Techniques at a community college or using a textbook from such a class, or possibly finding a continuing Ed class (there's a nice one on Singapore Math Teaching Techniques available through most colleges that do Ed2Go) This class is, quite literally, elementary math, with a focus on how to present and teach it. Because of that, it has kids playing with C-rods and counting cubes and other manipulatives so they can learn ways to present the content-which lets a kid who missed some foundational skills learn them without having to do, say, 3rd grade math, and if you do the college class route, it can often tick a math box for a non-math intensive major without having to take college algebra. What does she enjoy? What does she want to learn? To do? Look at those for electives or even alternative ways of meeting the core requirements. Outschool might be a good place to find low stress courses, as are my favorite two providers, Athena's Academy and Online G3. For the last two, consider looking at middle grade classes-because both of these cater to gifted and 2e kids, middle grade classes usually are high school content, but with low writing requirements (and are graded based on completion). The same thing that makes them a good fit for younger kids who need high content and minimal output can make them a good fit for older kids who need high content and minimal output, as long as that older kid can handle being in a virtual classroom (with cameras off) with some younger kids. I've found that for every one tutorial class, I have to find two lower stress ones, at minimum, and I have to have the day after "school" be super-light. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted February 14 Author Share Posted February 14 I tried giving her what I thought were high interest/easier academic electives. She draws constantly. I have a friend whom she loves that is a professional muralist who tutors art. She barely worked on her assignments throwing together something last minute. So, the next semester, I tried a class with other students. A little better but bare minimum effort. She just wanted to do her own thing and not make it a class where there were expectations(her words). I’m at a loss of anything. We are doing keys to Algebra with some measure of success. It seems to be about the right speed and content for the most part. But I still sit there wondering why I’m going through emotional chaos to teach a class that ultimately doesn’t matter. I’m a math person. I know the reasons why algebra and some other high school math is beneficial. I just can’t find my “why” in this case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maize Posted February 15 Share Posted February 15 38 minutes ago, bethben said: I tried giving her what I thought were high interest/easier academic electives. She draws constantly. I have a friend whom she loves that is a professional muralist who tutors art. She barely worked on her assignments throwing together something last minute. So, the next semester, I tried a class with other students. A little better but bare minimum effort. She just wanted to do her own thing and not make it a class where there were expectations(her words). I’m at a loss of anything. We are doing keys to Algebra with some measure of success. It seems to be about the right speed and content for the most part. But I still sit there wondering why I’m going through emotional chaos to teach a class that ultimately doesn’t matter. I’m a math person. I know the reasons why algebra and some other high school math is beneficial. I just can’t find my “why” in this case. If she draws constantly I would give her an art credit with no additional instruction or work. So far all of my high schoolers have had some credits that were entirely made up of stuff they were doing on their own because they wanted to. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bethben Posted February 15 Author Share Posted February 15 1 hour ago, maize said: If she draws constantly I would give her an art credit with no additional instruction or work. So far all of my high schoolers have had some credits that were entirely made up of stuff they were doing on their own because they wanted to. This is what I did. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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