S/O So, define "relaxed"

[KJB]

I'm trying to decide if I'm a "relaxed" home schooler or not. LOL!!

 

I feel pretty relaxed, but we get a mountain of work done (almost) every day. However, I'm happy to chuck it all and go on a field trip if the mood strikes us. Does that make me relaxed? If not, what does?

 

I won't be able to relax until I know if I'm relaxed. :lol:

 

What does "relaxed" look like to you?

[nukeswife]

Relaxed in our house looks kind of like this...

 

1. We do have specific subjects to do but they don't have to be done in a certain order.

 

2. We start when we are ready for the day, no set time. Some days this is 9am some days it's 1pm or anything in between or outside of that.

 

3. If we want to just chuck it all for the day and go on a field trip, no problem it will all get done another day.

 

4. If mom wakes up and just doesn't have school in her, then it's a "snow day" even if it's June.:001_smile:

 

5. The Yearly plan may change at mom's whim. Like we recently just up and took a 3 week vacation to WI, which after adding in travel time, packing etc. ended up being about 5 weeks total. So now the "last day of school" will come sometime in July instead of May or June. No big deal.

 

I feel lucky that I can do this because even though VA requires me to send in a standardized test, it only has to be in by Aug 1st and I don't have to teach any specific subjects or hours. There are also other options if I don't want to test, but for us that's easiest since I can give the CAT from Seton which is quick and pretty painless for the kids.

[battlemaiden]

This is a good question. I have wondered the same thing.

 

How old are your kids?

 

 

 

edit: I would like to see the ages and number of children of those who are relaxed...if they are willing to share, and it isn't already in their signature.

Edited October 21, 2008 by battlemaiden

[KJB]

(But I don't home school the 3 or the 3 mos! They're just along for the ride!)

[battlemaiden]

I'm trying to decide if I'm a "relaxed" home schooler or not. LOL!!

 

I feel pretty relaxed, but we get a mountain of work done (almost) every day. However, I'm happy to chuck it all and go on a field trip if the mood strikes us. Does that make me relaxed? If not, what does?

 

I won't be able to relax until I know if I'm relaxed. :lol:

 

What does "relaxed" look like to you?

 

Obviously I'm free streaming thought here :tongue_smilie:.

 

I think we *may* be confusing or interchanging the terms relaxed and child-directed. Could this be?

 

edit: good grief! Never mind me. I can't seem to finish a thought while nursing this baby. It has been too long since I read a philosopy of education book for me to comment on this topic. I'm really interested in others answering. I'll shut up now and read. :lol:

[KJB]

I'm hardly "child directed". I'm wayyyy to bossy to be that. :001_smile: I love rabbit trails and get excited when my children show special interest in a topic, but, I (without question) "direct" our schooling.

 

However, if one of my children doesn't want to write the silly paragraph asked for at the end of his Spelling Workout lesson, I've no problem saying "No biggie. Let's let it go." I adjust the plan on a whim for any number of things. And, "the plan" isn't engraved in anything either! So, I kind of feel "relaxed" even though we accomplish quite a bit.

[Laurie4b]

Yes. I think that relaxed is being used two different ways. There was a book some years ago called The Relaxed Homeschooler. If memory serves (it doesn't always!) the book supported a child-directed model that would fall under the unschooling umbrella. I think some people are using the term "relaxed" then in the technical sense of that book, while others are meaning they are more easy-going than strictly structured.

[RebeccaC]

When I first read the WTM (first edition) I wanted to chuck it in the trash because I knew for us it would spell burn out. Relaxed for me/us means that the rigor is gear to what my kids can handle not to what some one who has never met my boys think kids should be doing at ____ age/grade. That means no Latin. Due to the language delays my boys had, vision is their first language not English, since English was acquired as a second language adding a third before the second was mastered did not make sense.... Hope that made sense.

 

Math is also a language and my oldest son is not working on Algebra yet. He will be by Jan but not yet. So we are not on the WTM track for math although this boy is college bound but as an theater maybe history major. His uncles think he has a brilliant career ahead of him as a producer in the entertainment industry. Which is what his uncles do, produce ideas for TV shows and movies and then pass those ideas on to writers who put the idea into writing for a pilot via a script, ect.....

 

We do a certain amount of work each day. We home school year round but we school 4 days a week from 12 noonish to 6 or 8pm. That will soon change to 2pm to 10pm because d's work schedule is changing so our home and school schedule will change with his. I am relax about the time we start and end school on the days we do school. Dh's days off were Friday Saturday but they will change to Sunday Monday from Nov through March then his hours and days off will change again. We keep dh's schedule with the exception that Sunday is never a school day and Monday is scouts and co-op, third day off is one of dh's days off.

[KJB]

was a synonym for "unschooling" which I am surmising is the gold standard child-directed home schooling method.

 

I guess I'm not relaxed afterall. At least not by this definition!

 

Thanks!

[jamnkats]

For me, relaxed homeschooling and unschooling are nothing alike. Unschooling has nothing to do with academics; it is a way of life.

[Word Nerd]

I consider myself a relaxed homeschooler and do share some similar views as unschoolers, including the view that learning is a lifestyle and happens all the time, not just during set school hours. We don't even have set school hours. I lean more toward the unschooling end of the spectrum than the traditional school-at-home end. However, I'm not an unschooler because I don't give my daughter a choice about doing the three Rs (partly because of state standards). We still have a lot of time for child-directed learning and rabbit trails. I don't know what you would call that, but I know a lot of others who do the same thing and call themselves relaxed homeschoolers.

[RebeccaC]

was a synonym for "unschooling" which I am surmising is the gold standard child-directed home schooling method.

 

I guess I'm not relaxed after all. At least not by this definition!

 

Thanks!

 

 

I am not sure if you are responding to me or not because we do not unschool here. We don't keep a traditional day or hour schedule but we school according to our schedule and I chose the subjects and the curriculum. We just don't go by what other folks think we should study. We school a bit to our kids interests but interests and ability are two separate things. My oldest son did not read short vowel words until he was 10 because of dyslexia. I could have burnt him out drilling him with sight words or short vowel words instead I built the auditory skills that were the foundation for reading. So while other kids were learning to read, I read aloud and we worked on short term memory, sequencing, auditory skills, etc.... He now reads at college level but he does not write at college level.

 

Right now my kids use;

 

Apologia Science

Several curriculum for History ala Logic stage WTM BJU texts, KingFisher, time lines, out lining, Teaching Company dvds etc....

LOF and Lial's Basic College Math and Video Text algebra for younger son

Movies as Literature

TC DVDs on shakespeare along with Asimov's guide to shakespeare

Ect...

 

I was unschooled as a teen in 74-76/77ish and I would never ever do that to my boys. Relaxed means we move at our pace which for the most part which right now is logic stage not Rhetoric in some subjects to use WTM lingo. I don't think 10th grade means the middle ages in the 4 year cycle using x. I decide how rigorous our schooling is not some outside force. Unschooling is the child directing their learning and the subjects studied but I direct the learning based on what I know the kids can handle and curriculum texts are used and take into consideration areas they express interest in.

 

Since oldest ds is behind in math, and math is the language of science, he is not doing traditional high school science and he hates science but he works on what I give him. He wanted to study Shakespeare and he is but I chose how and what books and lectures would be used, as in Asimov and Teaching Company Lectures and the reading of plays.

 

When I was unschooled I chose both the subjects and the books and did whatever I wanted, when ever I wanted or could with NO input from either parent. There were no texts of any kind used when I was unschool. I did read all of Tolstoy and most of the major Russian and selected Brit lit works, as in all of a certain authors works but did no analysis and learned no lit terms. I did no math, grammar, writing, however my boys do all of those subjects every day but at the level they are at not at the level some education guru thinks they should. Because of the way I was unschooled when I got to college I had to take remedial math and english and my boys will not have to do that because they work on those areas every day. Hope that makes sense. We do not unschool here :001_smile:

Edited October 22, 2008 by RebeccaC
Because I think faster than my fingers move and spell check is not my friend.....

[Peela]

Relaxed here means there is structure- we are early risers, kids are up by certain time, chores, school starts pretty much on time each morning. Our work gets done.

But we work for about 20-25 hours a week, and the rest of the time is personal time, social time, recreation time. Since my kids are ages almost 13, and 14, that is considered "relaxed" I gather, from hanging out on the highschool boards a bit.

 

I prefer to think of "relaxed" though as a way of living, and a style, rather than how many hours we work. The western world is caught up in thinking if you are not stressed, you are a lazy good for nothing. We don't value just being, we don't value ourselves intrinsically, we only value being productive and our self worth is centred around our career, our productivity, our contribution to the machine of consumer society.

 

I want my kids to enjoy their lives NOW not spend their childhood preparing for later and then the rest of their lives preparing for later until they die. I don't want to train them for the treadmill of consumer society- I want to train them how to live well within it without being caught up in it- in other words, how to be happy. To me relaxed means this is our life NOW and we are going to enjoy it to the best of our ability. That is the best training for a happy life for them.

But to be self disciplined is also necessary for a happy life- not disciplined to fullfil someone else's ideas of anything, but able to be disciplined enough to get where they want in life. Discipline is part of happiness.

So relaxed doesnt mean undisciplined. It just means not driven toward some future goal to the extent where one doesnt enjoy and savour the present.

 

I truly think that the world would be a better place if everone workd a few hours a day. There would be work for all and everyone would have plenty of recreation.

[Plucky]

.

Edited October 24, 2008 by True Blue

[Zelda]

Oh, heck no.

[nukeswife]

I prefer to think of "relaxed" though as a way of living, and a style, rather than how many hours we work. The western world is caught up in thinking if you are not stressed, you are a lazy good for nothing. We don't value just being, we don't value ourselves intrinsically, we only value being productive and our self worth is centred around our career, our productivity, our contribution to the machine of consumer society.

 

I want my kids to enjoy their lives NOW not spend their childhood preparing for later and then the rest of their lives preparing for later until they die. I don't want to train them for the treadmill of consumer society- I want to train them how to live well within it without being caught up in it- in other words, how to be happy. To me relaxed means this is our life NOW and we are going to enjoy it to the best of our ability. That is the best training for a happy life for them.

But to be self disciplined is also necessary for a happy life- not disciplined to fullfil someone else's ideas of anything, but able to be disciplined enough to get where they want in life. Discipline is part of happiness.

So relaxed doesnt mean undisciplined. It just means not driven toward some future goal to the extent where one doesnt enjoy and savour the present.

 

I truly think that the world would be a better place if everone workd a few hours a day. There would be work for all and everyone would have plenty of recreation.

 

:iagree: That is an excellent view on life. I love it. That's just how dh and I want to raise our kids. I couldn't have said it better.

[Rosy]

For me, relaxed means we don't start at the same time every day, we adjust the schedule if we want to go somewhere (this happens once a week or so), we have some subjects we do regularly (daily or twice a week) and some we do when it works for us, and we're not concerned with staying at grade level or finishing books at the end of the year.

[WTMindy]

the view that learning is a lifestyle and happens all the time, not just during set school hours.

 

I wouldn't consider myself a relaxed schooler or an unschooler, but I whole-heartedly buy the above statement!! I don't really have a definition for relaxed schooler, actually. I think it probably means a lot of different things to different people.

[Parrothead]

:hurray:

From the descriptions here I think I'm a relaxed homeschool mom.

 

We don't start on time every day. I have chucked plans for something for fun - like video game day (hand-eye coordination practice), or baking day or a field trip.

 

I do try to finish all the work I set out to do by the end of the year. This means that some weeks we really buckle down and get a lot done to make up for the time we "good-off."

 

I'm also thinking that the long we do this homeschooling thing the more relaxed I'm taking it.

[Amy in Orlando]

We're relaxed if it means I don't care when the boys get up nor do I care about the order in which they do their work. We're not unschoolers by any stretch, but I do admire those with the fortitude to truly unschool.

 

I'm very up front with the boys about what I hope to accomplish each week. If we finish early, we usually have a beach day (funny how they'll get up early for that!) on Friday. If not, oh well. I don't want them to grow up thinking you HAVE to be busy every single minute of your life. I don't want them to be "consumers" in the way many of their friends are consumers. More than anything I want them to be able to find the information they need, make solid decisions for themselves and to be able to function when things don't go according to plan. So far, mostly, so good.

[Mama Lynx]

Relaxed here means:

 

We have only a loose structure to our days

 

The more independent children have lots of control over their schedule

 

Minimal amount of academic work in the early grades

 

No busy work, no time wasters (which has occasionally come back to bite me, when I've learned, down the road, that something I thought was busy work was actually laying an important foundation)

 

We try to stay flexible to take advantage of opportunities, and days when we just don't want to do the normal routine. As my kids get older, though, we are becoming less and less flexible.

 

We strive to not have school take up the whole day