Sunshine State Sue Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 Ds has finished his first year of college. I have observed signs of maturity that I would like to share to offer hope to those with high schoolers. I'm shy, though, and don't want to go first. :blush: Please share signs of maturity you have observed in your college students. I'll come back later and share my own observations. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadeOrchidSong Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 Such a wondful thread! i need the encouragement to know that my boys will turn out kind, gentle, considerate, courteous, responsible, cheerful, godly, and so on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine State Sue Posted July 17, 2015 Author Share Posted July 17, 2015 I described ds as a bright but unmotivated student. I spent too much time pushing, pulling, dragging him through schoolwork. He spent (imo) way too much time playing video games. These are the things he's told me or I've observed: 1. At Christmas, he told me that 4/6 basketball freshman didn't drink. That surprised me. At the end of the year, he told me he was the only one now that didn't drink. That surprised me as well. I certainly did my fair share of experimenting with alcohol in college. Ds heard me say a number of times that I quit drinking at 19 because I got tired of worshiping the porcelain god. Dh doesn't drink. Alcoholism runs on both sides of ds's family. I think ds knows this, although the active alcoholics are dead now. I do keep small bottles of wine around for cooking, and offered a few times during his teenage years for him to try it. He's a totally picky eater, though, and I think that works in my favor here. 2. Students generally don't spend more than a year on campus. So, second semester, ds started house/townhouse/apartment hunting. He actually created a spreadsheet (an example of organization that never before had been exhibited) with name, location, distance from school, #bedrooms, #bathrooms, price on it. Noted which places had bathrooms on the hallway as opposed to the master bedroom. Noted garage space. Added square footage at my suggestion. He did the vast majority of the legwork. They needed an extra roommate and he contacted the athletic secretary to send out an email to all athletes, advertised on craigslist, and spoke with potential roommates. Eventually, got a couple of CC basketball transfer students. 3. GPA first semester 2.8. I was happy with that because he needs a 2.5 to keep his academic scholarship. Apparently, he was not happy with that, though. Cumulative GPA second semester 3.25. Dh asked him what made the difference. Ds basically said he stopped procrastinating. 4. We knew that ds would spend the summer at school because the basketball team still practices and plays in a summer league. Ds knew we expected him to work during the summer. He actually prepared a resume and asked us for feedback. He was going to apply for a summer job on campus. He asked who he should ask for a reference. We told him his coach and a teacher. When he talked to the coach, the coach set him up with a company in town that is owned by a couple of former basketball players. They give the guys summer jobs. So, he's doing boring manual labor 40hrs/wk this summer. He's not very happy about it. But, he's doing it. I hope this encourages others. I can remember a few times as ds grew up where he came through a situation and I would think "maybe he'll turn out all right after all". Not that I really doubt it, but these are all good signs. 22 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 Ds is just beginning his college years this fall, yet he's already had one experience that kind of wowed me. He's an average student, path of least resistance type of guy, and non-competitive. He had to take a placement test for one class and has some testing anxiety. He took it once and didn't pass. He said he wanted to try again and would continue to try until he made it. He took it again and was within one point of the cutoff. He was mad, at himself mostly. Later that week he got a call from the department that said they hand graded his exam and he wouldn't have to test again. He was thrilled. He went to orientation and it wouldn't let him sign up for the class he placed into. I was on campus but not with him. He opted to not test that day as he wanted to study more. I was pretty upset because he would have had time to test again before registration if we'd have known. He was upset, yet his attitude wowed me. Apparently his score had caused some conflict in the department, as most thought the second score should get him into the class. The head of the department said no, while others in testing area went to bat for ds. We ran one of those people when we were leaving and ds spoke up, said he understood the rule, was planning on testing again if necessary anyway, and generally handled the conflict very well, with great maturity. We had a long chat about how attitude and reputation are as important as grades. The next week he tested again and got a 90%, allowing him to sign up for the class with no issue. 11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dina in Oklahoma Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 DD hasn't graduated, but this is ENCOURAGING!!! Congrats on your DS's progress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connections Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 I am having one of those weepy days- wanting my children to stop growing up and wishing things were as simple as when they were little! For some reason these glimpses down the road have touched my heart and reminded me of the big picture. Our children all have work to accomplish in this world and it is a blessing to be able to help form them and to celebrate their successes (big and little) as they make their way. Thanks for taking the time to share! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy+2 Posted July 17, 2015 Share Posted July 17, 2015 I love this thread! I have no stories to post as my boys are still a little too 'immature', but it is nice to see the light at the end of the tunnel! My oldest is just starting to turn toward a more mature thought process. All of a sudden it seems he is no longer 'flying by the seat of his pants' and he is starting to think more about what he wants his future to look like. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bugs Posted July 18, 2015 Share Posted July 18, 2015 2. Students generally don't spend more than a year on campus. So, second semester, ds started house/townhouse/apartment hunting. He actually created a spreadsheet (an example of organization that never before had been exhibited) with name, location, distance from school, #bedrooms, #bathrooms, price on it. Noted which places had bathrooms on the hallway as opposed to the master bedroom. Noted garage space. Added square footage at my suggestion. He did the vast majority of the legwork. They needed an extra roommate and he contacted the athletic secretary to send out an email to all athletes, advertised on craigslist, and spoke with potential roommates. Eventually, got a couple of CC basketball transfer students. Ooooo...so I will continue to hope and dream for my son. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2att Posted July 19, 2015 Share Posted July 19, 2015 My dd just finished her freshman year. It was refreshing to see her take charge in areas where I felt like all I did was nag while she was in high school (Did you turn in that essay? What's the deadline for that application? Did you search for more scholarships? Etc . . .) About halfway through her freshman year she decided she wanted to study abroad for the summer. We told her she would have to contribute financially if she were to go, so she applied for the program, paid the deposit, spent time submitting searching out and applying for scholarship opportunities, and got an on campus job. All on her own time/initiative and without any input from me. During this time she was also taking more credit hours and getting better grades than her first semester. She spent six weeks in Spain, had the time of her life, and can't wait to go back :-) 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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