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s/o what do you say for motivation when the child is giving up

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“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.â€

― Theodore Roosevelt


I use the above quote often especially when kids have to tackle something that puts them out of their comfort zone.  I used it last year when I taught public speaking to a group.  Dh has it posted in his art studio.


Galatians 6:9 - And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.   


I use other Bible verses too at times, but I wasn't sure if you wanted them.


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I try to be motivational when the child is experiencing sincere difficulties and the "giving up" is a result of those issues; I try to stay positive, and will occasionally slip my eldest notes with... don't laugh... Dr. Seuss quotes, lol. I love some of his quotes!


When "giving up" is the result of poor attitude, I'm prone to saying "suck it up, buttercup". Lol.

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I don't do quotes. I remind the kids of a time when they did persevere and how they felt when they did. I empathise with it being a hard thing to persevere, and let them  know that they're not alone in finding 'giving up' attractive.

Yes, I do this as well.  

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We do a lot of "put it on the backburner." It changed math for my K'er in a big way. Instead of giving up, negative attitude, "I can't!," she'll ask to put it on the backburner for 15 or 20 minutes. It's enough time to finish some other lesson, and often when she comes back to her work she finds it's easier than she'd thought. Often, not always, because it's not a magic trick.


For activities that my kids have wanted to quit, I'll often agree that they can quit after we finish our commitment (month paid in gymnastics, month paid for piano, etc.). I think knowing that they can quit helps them when they're feeling frustrated. We've not quit anything - yet. 


Sometimes, I tell them that we've got to "keep our heads down and power though," but Arrested Development quotes fly over my kids' heads.

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This first came up in our house in the context of fear (fear of failure), so I asked, "Who's the boss here? Is fear the boss or are you the boss?" Later I overheard my daughter saying to herself, "I'M THE BOSS OF FEAR!" :)


This applies to other things, too:


I'm the boss of math!

I'm the boss of spelling!


Can't let those things beat you :)

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My/our favourites:


We practice to make hard things easier (our violin teacher but useful in all contexts). 


Doing hard things helps your brain to grow big and strong. 


And for me:

Victory is never final; failure is never fatal. It's the courage to continue that counts. Winston Churchill I think. 

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