Preteen Boy Behavior

[Paige]

Is it normal and typical for preteen boys to just turn into jerks for a while? DS used to be so incredibly sweet and considerate. For the past 6mos or so, he's frequently acting like a jerk. He teases his sisters for fun, he does mean things to them when they play video games (attacks their characters, boxes them in, sends monsters after them) because it amuses him, and frequently moans and groans if he's required to be patient or show consideration for someone else. It's not all the time, but it is a problem. He's not angry or intending to hurt anyone's feelings- he's just having fun (picture that last part said in the most annoying preteen voice possible). But- he really doesn't seem to care that nobody else is having fun, whereas in the past, he would have cared.

 

When I see him playing with other boys his age, it seems that they all enjoy acting like jerks together. Usually, none of the boys get annoyed with each other and they aren't fighting. He doesn't understand that he can't behave the same way with others as he does with his friends.

 

Is this normal preteen boy behavior for DS and his friends? We don't have many opportunities for him to be with other boys his age, so I'd hate to tell him he can't play with his friends anymore. Mostly, they are polite to outsiders as a group. If the boys are over here, they aren't rude to his sisters or us. It's only when they leave and DS doesn't have anyone else who enjoys his jerk comments or games.

 

I'm hoping to hear this is normal and that with patience and care, he'll outgrow it.

[Snickerdoodle]

Some moms and I were just talking about this.  Apparently, girls don't own the market on preteen nuttiness.

[Goldilocks]

My sweet boy is gone too.  He is often grumpy and impatient with me and his siblings.  

[momto10blessings]

Unfortunately it seems to be the norm. However, my boy who was my hardest baby and child had sailed through with no problems (yet)! My sweet gentle son was the worst. Attitude, harshness towards younger siblings, etc. I've found that it helps to make sure they have plenty of physical activity, including manly chores like chopping and moving wood, cutting grass and spending plenty of time with dad or another manly figure.

Good luck!

[Kalypso]

Both of my boys have been this way, too. Unfortunately, my 14 year old doesn't seem to show signs of improving yet. I don't know why I am posting because I have no advice better than what you have been told already, I guess I wanted to let you know that there are many of us dealing with preteen and teen boys issues.

[Dory]

My oldest is turning into that sort of boy too. He is normally a very sweet, super tender fellow, but not anymore I guess. It's better on the days that he works more. His chore amounts have gone up. When he has chores in the morning that are more physically active type of chores and the same for the afternoon/evening, he is a much, much nicer boy to be around. This summer he is going to be taking over the mowing and helping build me a root cellar. Although I'll send the youngest out to help with that too, might as well get him started before he turns into a jerk.

[Guest]

OMGosh yes.  Mine are now 21 and 18, and we are all lucky we lived through their preteen/teenage years.  Thankfully, dh is big on the kids showing respect, especially to me, so they usually knew when they were getting really close to crossing the line.