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Advice needed: 60 yr old needs psychiatric assesment


JVA
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If you have any experience with trying to persuade a 60+ yr old man that an assesment and therapy will help him, let me know how you did this. My bil exhibits many Asperger symptoms and has had lifelong struggles with interactions, reading emotional signs from people and being very offensive with his words and seemingly oblivious to theoseoffenses.

 

To add to the situation, his family and the extended family are cowards about pointing things out to him and any kind of 'confrontation' is viewed as mean and an attack. Even if it is done in a loving manner, it is seen as vindictive.

 

He has had a successful military career , a family, is highly intelligent and well educated. He reminds me a great deal of Bill Gates and Dr. Hugh Ross. Smart, but clueless when it comes to human interaction. His wife passed away last year and he married within a year, is very healthy and fit and loves his children and grandchildren . So, despite his age, he has a lot of life to look forward to and we think professional help will benefit everyone. If you have any advice, I'm all ears

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Well.... if his immediate and extended family don't think there is a problem, and he is living a successful life, I'm not sure it's any of your business to suggest that he get a psychological evaluation.

 

I'm sure you mean well, but this isn't really your concern, and nothing in your post suggests that he is unhappy, so I'm not sure why you would think he needs some sort of intervention.

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You can bring it up, but it sounds like that has been done.

 

I had a relative who was quite a terror in the community because of mental illness, and there was *nothing* we could do. She thought that the rest of the world was crazy, not her. So that was that. Unless they are breaking a law and/or hurting someone, you're stuck.

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Ha! I think you might be describing my dad.

 

It's sad. I love him and he loves me, but it's impossible to have a relationship with him. It's like he's in a bubble and we can't get to him. I fully understand the bit about making highly offensive comments and being clueless about it. It's exceedingly difficult to get close to someone who doesn't understand even the bare basics of how to interact with others.

 

I talked with my mother about it and she said that he is convinced nothing is wrong. And that's key. If your BIL knows something is amiss, you can talk to him. But if he thinks everything is hunky-dory, then nothing you do or say will have an impact.

 

 

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