Update on my son

[SeekingSimplicity]

Y'all remember my delima with the public school? I pulled my son out of school and have been doing time4learning as well as book work from memoria press. I'm really pleased with his progress. My friend who babysits and his grandmother and father all find it easy to do t4l with him while they are watching him. Then during my free time I'm working out of books with him.

 

One thing that gets me, there are things the teacher said he couldn't do. Well of course, we hadn't gotten to them. That's why he was there, to learn these things and get caught up. So, things like adding 3 digits that he couldn't do he's now doing. He just needed someone to show him how. Once he was shown he caught on fast. That tells me no one at the school took the time to show him the things he didn't know. They just said he doesn't know this, he should go back a grade, no way to catch him up.

 

Trying to let that go and move on. But they still want dd2 (11yo in 5th) to be retained and that there is no choices there either. I'm struggling with this one because I think she could get some help with things at school that I'm not as equipped to help her with, but don't want her to be held back solely because she had to be put into a tier 1 class. I've asked her how she feels about it, and she does't want to be held back, but she is enjoying school and making friends. SHe asked if I could get her caught up so she can move up, told her it doesn't work that way. The school won't let her do that. So she doesn't know what she wants either.

[bobbeym]

I'm glad things are working out for your DS and he's catching up.

 

I only vaguely remember your previous post, and so maybe I'm just missing something, but why can't you work with your DD on the areas the school says she's behind in so she can get where she needs to be by the end of the year? If she's on level with your school district's requirements for end of year 5th graders, the school doesn't have any basis to hold her back. Is pulling her out to hs an option?

 

IMO, I wouldn't hold back an 11yo to repeat 5th grade. That would make her much older than her peers and could potentially create self-esteem issues. I'd just work harder to get her where she needs to be on our own, or to push the school into doing it.

[SeekingSimplicity]

The school says she has to be held back, they have no choice, and even if I did work with her and get her caught up to grade level they can't have her place tested because they just don't do that.

 

It really doesn't make any sense to me. :(

[Dahliarw]

If the school won't move her up you can either bring her home (even just for a year, get her caught up and then enroll her in 7th the following year) or take it higher, and appeal to the school board.

[Arcadia]

The school says she has to be held back, they have no choice, and even if I did work with her and get her caught up to grade level they can't have her place tested because they just don't do that.

 

It really doesn't make any sense to me. :(

 

Does not make sense to me either. Public schools have remedial resources for language arts and math. My area use Mark12 for LA and Aleks for math.

Would 6th grade be in different school or same? Here they do place testing for new students and for students recommended for retaining. Parents need to consent for the child to be held back. I would check the state's rules on retaining though.

[itsheresomewhere]

Assuming you are in the US, you have to sign paperwork agreeing to her being held back. Does she have IEP? If not, get the ball rolling and demand one. Check out wrightslaw.com for help.

[Anne in CA]

This is so maddening, because I smell that there is another reason why they will not let you work with her and help her catch up. Most schools go out of their way to pass failing students. They must have a small class next year and want extras??? Or they are getting some kind of funding if they keep her back?? I don't know what it would be, but there is something that stinks about this. Whatever you do, don't give in and let them hold her back. Another year with the same teacher that didn't do well this time is not going to help anything.

[itsheresomewhere]

This is so maddening, because I smell that there is another reason why they will not let you work with her and help her catch up. Most schools go out of their way to pass failing students. They must have a small class next year and want extras??? Or they are getting some kind of funding if they keep her back?? I don't know what it would be, but there is something that stinks about this. Whatever you do, don't give in and let them hold her back. Another year with the same teacher that didn't do well this time is not going to help anything.

 

 

I wonder if they have a big/highly rated state test in the next grade. One that means a certain amount of funding if they have so many passing/certain level.

[bobbeym]

I agree with the PPs.

 

It sounds really fishy to me that a public school system would have no remedial options available, no way to do grade placement testing, and would force a child to be held back regardless of whether it's in the child's best interest to do so. Something isn't right there, and it's probably what they're telling you.

 

Whatever you do, don't let them force you into something you don't agree with. Trust your instincts, momma; they're not wrong.

 

Years and years ago, my brother was held back in 7th grade b/c ONE teacher insisted he wasn't ready for 8th grade. A second year with a teacher he already didn't get along with only made a bad situation worse. He ended up dropping out of school at 16, got his GED, and then passed CC admit tests with perfect scores. Only now do our parents wish they'd fought more for him and trusted the school system less.