Moral/Christian...If you know there are people starving in the world....

[Carol in Cal.]

One of the things that makes overseas work so enticing is that money goes so much further there. So for maybe $2 you can enable someone in Africa to have a malaria net, and literally save his life. Literally.

 

(Check out the Lutheran Malaria Initiative. It's awesome.)

 

So compared with buying someone locally a new toy for Christmas, it's difficult not to feel that the net is A) more efficient and B) more important.

 

But I do believe that the human contact is also important, and also that it is when we have compassion that we are most like Christ, and that if we don't ever have compassion locally, there is something amiss. I don't want to say what I do exactly, because that feels a little like not giving in secret, but I kind of balance these things.

 

As a Christian, too, I believe in the Communion of Saints, and if it's real, then we should care for each other--directly, materially, spiritually, and emotionally--close up and at a distance.

[SunnyDays]

OP, I can tell you have such a heart for caring for others. But you can't be too hard on yourself. No one person can serve all causes. :) We each do what we're able to do and what we're called to do.

 

Many of you mention the church serving/giving locally vs. internationally. I will say that's one thing I love about our church. Our Lenten project was to raise funds to build churches in an African country. But once a week, the doors of the church are opened to anyone of need in our community... services and prayer are offered, and so is a hot meal, and either a food pantry or clothes closet. I love the balance and people strongly have a heart for serving both locally and globally.

[SunnyDays]

OP, I can tell you have such a heart for caring for others. But you can't be too hard on yourself. No one person can serve all causes. :) We each do what we're able to do and what we're called to do.

 

Many of you mention the church serving/giving locally vs. internationally. I will say that's one thing I love about our church. Our Lenten project was to raise funds to build churches in an African country. But once a week, the doors of the church are opened to anyone of need in our community... services and prayer are offered, and so is a hot meal, and either a food pantry or clothes closet. I love the balance and people strongly have a heart for serving both locally and globally.

[Shawndrese]

OP, I can tell you have such a heart for caring for others. But you can't be too hard on yourself. No one person can serve all causes. :) We each do what we're able to do and what we're called to do.

 

Many of you mention the church serving/giving locally vs. internationally. I will say that's one thing I love about our church. Our Lenten project was to raise funds to build churches in an African country. But once a week, the doors of the church are opened to anyone of need in our community... services and prayer are offered, and so is a hot meal, and either a food pantry or clothes closet. I love the balance and people strongly have a heart for serving both locally and globally.

 

Our church sounds similar...we (the church) help and donate a lot to local charities, and have traveled to other states to help when needed, but we also have built churches and wells in the DR and Haiti and do yearly missions trips. I don't think its right to say that one is more worthy than the other.

[Laurie4b]

I think these are very good questions and ones that each person has to pray about for herself. I think as Americans we're out of balance with our sense of what we "need." We just watched Schindler's List the other night. This hedonistic, greedy businessman eventually became truly engaged with the Jews he had hired and began essentially buying them with bribes to save them from death camps. At the end of the war, he was portrayed as saying things like, "Why did I keep ____? I could have sold it and saved 2 more." etc. There does come a point where things could get out of balance the other way, but I think most Americans are in very little danger of that.

[Liz CA]

I think some of us are wired to be more bothered by this and have a "soft" spot for those kind of plights. This is why I sponsor a child through one of the organizations. I cannot save and feed everyone but I can feed one child...Others see opportunities in other areas where they feel called to help.

[myfunnybunch]

Part of my problem is that I'm constantly feeling like I need to do more. We have six kiddos currently....the youngest two are foster babies but we are hoping to adopt them. Several of our kids have special needs. I realize that's quite a bit to handle right there....BUT...my heart hurts for the homeless man that is always standing outside of Target.....the many many special needs children on waiting lists in our county, the teeny babies in the NICU at the hospital who will be there for several months until they are finally stable enough to be placed in a foster home, etc.....

 

:grouphug::grouphug: Mine too. This helps me:

 

Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by accidents of time, or place, or circumstance, are brought into closer connection with you. (St. Augustine)

 

Prayer is a wonderful place to find clarity and peace.

 

Cat

[myfunnybunch]

I think some of us are wired to be more bothered by this and have a "soft" spot for those kind of plights. This is why I sponsor a child through one of the organizations. I cannot save and feed everyone but I can feed one child...Others see opportunities in other areas where they feel called to help.

 

:iagree:

 

I think of the starfish story.

 

Cat

[dalynnrmc]

As a Christian, too, I believe in the Communion of Saints, and if it's real, then we should care for each other--directly, materially, spiritually, and emotionally--close up and at a distance.

 

This! :iagree:

 

 

Part of my problem is that I'm constantly feeling like I need to do more. We have six kiddos currently....the youngest two are foster babies but we are hoping to adopt them. Several of our kids have special needs. I realize that's quite a bit to handle right there....BUT...my heart hurts for the homeless man that is always standing outside of Target.....the many many special needs children on waiting lists in our county, the teeny babies in the NICU at the hospital who will be there for several months until they are finally stable enough to be placed in a foster home, etc.....

 

(There is also this whole other thing going on in our family right now. My MIL, who is toxic, is dying of liver cancer. She lives alone so we are all taking turns helping her out. She has hospice care ...but of course I feel badly for not doing more for her. There is no verse in the bible that talks about helping family who have inflicted years of hurt into your life)

 

But I digress (sorry...I'm sort of all over the map here). I know that I need to spend much more time in prayer. I'm sure that's where my clarity will come from but I do appreciate all of your help here. :grouphug:

 

 

LOL I could've written so much of what you've said here.

 

We have 5 children, none of whom are foster kids though; my oldest deals with HFA. Helping SIL as we can with her situation and her kiddos (one of whom has special needs).

 

MIL is in stage 5 kidney failure, after a dx 2 years ago of heart failure. She's not with hospice, "but."

 

(And as for helping those who've inflicted hurt, there are *plenty* of verses on forgiveness, which is up to YOU, not up to them. It's a decision, not a feeling, and it doesn't matter if they change or not. Christ forgives us *as* we forgive others, and if we do not, He does not. Period. Decision time. But that's neither here nor there, for the topic's sake.)

 

 

What's more, as far as situation goes, we aren't even in a position to be helping anyone. Hubby lost his job, working now for peanuts so he can go to school (which he started this week, YAY!), and we are rolling change for gas let alone thinking about giving anything away. We do what we can, even down to giving away things which we could have sold because they were needed. Locally, btw.

 

And one day I will be in a position to help a wider circle. One day, God will use me as a funnel to help those He has allowed my heart to ache for. Until then, I can pray for them, I can sow the seeds needed now to reap later... so I can continue to sow in larger fields. Our lesson now is watching which fields we sow into, and that includes not only our money but our TIME.

 

Know what? I can't give away much time right now either. But I can spend it properly, with the Lord, and guiding my children in it. I can share with my husband, kids, family, anyone who will listen, about what the Lord has laid on my heart as far as others and giving. And I can let the Lord teach me about compassion and loving others. I think that's what He's trying to teach me - it's all about LOVE. Not pity, not.. not.. not.. what's the word here.. uncomfortableness because of the social differences I see (guilt? maybe). Doing all things out of LOVE. Seeing people and situations as Christ would see them. That's terminology I've heard all my life, but only recently was able to get hold of and wrap my mind around.

 

 

Be sure that, whatever giving you do, is out of LOVE and not out of a feeling of guilt and condemnation for what you have. :)

[mykdsmomy]

This! :iagree:He's trying to teach me - it's all about LOVE. Not pity, not.. not.. not.. what's the word here.. uncomfortableness because of the social differences I see (guilt? maybe). Doing all things out of LOVE. Seeing people and situations as Christ would see them. That's terminology I've heard all my life, but only recently was able to get hold of and wrap my mind around.

 

 

Be sure that, whatever giving you do, is out of LOVE and not out of a feeling of guilt and condemnation for what you have. :)

 

I need to sit and let this soak in ;) I think I am guilty of feeling pity and guilt over people's situation...maybe I'm mistaking that feeling for empathy? I need to turn those feelings into actions of love rather than feelings of sadness and pity.

 

Thank you!!!

 

And thank you again, everyone!

[homeschoolkitty]

I suggest that you start at home, where you and your kiddos can see the difference. there are those that are able and CAN give more... since it sounds that you are having a heart opening, start at home small, and then if you want to can have a garage sale and give the proceeds to a ministry in a one time basis, and if you and your kiddos/hubby catch the "bug", you might end up in a mission trip or so, then your kiddos will save up for that, etc.

 

Small for us has been buying bunnies / chickens for the poor in Asia, helping the gospel for asia... one time a year... since we cannot afford even Starbucks...

 

Then another year was ANGEL TREE! my 3yr old and 5yr old, got it!!! got the idea of buying for someone with out a mami or daddy that can buy a present. so we did it, and delivered it.... They walked to the salvation army and gave their present to be wrapped. my 3yr old, didn't want to... so he gave his walmart bag, with toys he had chosen for another 3yr old... saying... "its not for me"

 

The most debilitating, freezing thing you can do is do nothing, and feel guilty. do a little and see if you like it...

[FiveOaksAcademy]

I have gone through much of this myself. I've felt guilt and made resolutions that I didn't keep. :lol: I've prayed a lot about this topic and read some books that would help me to make decisions about how to make changes. I'm really having to learn how to "think" like Christ in this matter, not giving reluctantly or under compulsion but to be a cheerful giver. It's been hard because of the guilt I had relating to this.

 

One change we did make was to start a change jar to give to missions. I usually gear it towards orphan-related missions in Africa. Our church has a yearly drive to earn money to give to the local pregnancy crisis center, so we give to that during that time. Most of the time when I pay for something, rather than paying with dollars and change, I pay with dollars and keep the change to put in the jar, even if I'll get back most of a dollar's worth. It adds up quickly. Sometimes my older kids will get extra money and throw a $20 bill in there. We saved about $350 in one school year by being serious about putting our change in there every time we had any!! This year, with tax money and change we were able to support two orphans for a year.

 

There is a lot more I would like to do!!