Night Elf Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 After getting opinions here about handwriting and typing, DH and I sat down with ds15 (Aspie) and talked about what new goals we would like to set for him. He got angry. Then he sunk into a depression and started verbally beating himself up for being 'stupid'. He is taking all the blame for not being able to do what other kids do easily. But he'll do anything we ask of him, so at least I know he won't be defiant. I know it's too much to ask that he approach this with any kind of enthusiasm, but this is exactly why I always dropped the idea over the past 11 years of homeschooling. I'm trying to impress upon him that these are skills that will serve him even more than some academic subjects and that now is a good time to start working on them. He can't see what we mean. We're starting slowly. I suggested we both start a journal that will gradually increase his handwriting speed. We're going to start with 2 minutes of writing. I have no idea how he'll do but I feel like it's a good place to start. We're just going to free write. I don't want him having to think about an assignment because the goal is to increase his speed and confidence. And he'll do typing for 10 minutes a day because it will take about that much time to go through a lesson. I also suggested that he do the same practice for several days in a row because learning to type won't be an overnight endeavor. I just feel like the bad guy. I really believe he needs to do this but I hate being the enforcer. He depends on me for so much and has very little confidence in being independent. He says he struggles enough with school work that it makes him miserable but that he doesn't struggle enough to qualify for any special help. Academically, he's a very bright student. It's the writing assignments (essays of 1 paragraph to 5 paragraphs), of which there are many with an online program, that bother him the most. Dh doesn't want to change his high school program because we like the idea of an accredited diploma. We need the accountability of an outside program because we're too lax about assignments if we don't need to turn them in. We'll just keep plugging away. Maybe he'll get used to the new things. At least they won't have writing assignments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happycc Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 I like how you are implementing both handwriting and typing skills. I like how you are documenting the improvements by timing. I do believe that many families need the accountability (ours included). I have a child too who takes things very personally and is very sensitive about any kind of improvements needed to be done. (most people call this constructive criticisms.) I have learned over the years with my son to be very minimal with them due to his "beating up with himself." Most parents are able to see what the child need improvement on and then we find ways to solve the problem and then we implement the plan. Most kids take this in stride. Other kids -either go ballistic on the parents or on themselves when anything is suggested. HYPERSENSITIVE. I am curious if your son is able to make his own observations about himself. My son (now age 17)at first couldn't but as time goes on he is able to see what he needs to work on on his own. Then he come to me and says "Mom I am struggling in such and such." Then we sit and brainstorm possibly solutions ..... I start by saying,"what kinds of exercises/games do you think could help you improve in this area?" Brainstorm.... Then we come up with a plan to implement some of these exercises and collect data. Then I say "We can spend money on a tutor and have it come out of your Christmas and Birthday money and have them implement a similar plan.Or we can work together to implement the plan and save some money at the same time. But in order to implement the plan we have to be willing to work together and be consistent in order to see improvements. " I say something to the effect that "everyone one struggles with something. People need extra practice in order to master the skill. Some people may need the skills broken down in parts and maybe someone may be struggling in just one part of the whole skill. This is a normal part of learning for everyone. " Regardless, these kids are the hardest to work with because they know they are different but not different enough for help. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funnygirl Posted February 20, 2012 Share Posted February 20, 2012 I think you're awesome and your ds is so LUCKY to have you on his side. Of course he doesn't realize the importance of writing/typing. That's why you're the grown-up, and he's still the kid. Your 2-minute free writing and 10-minute typing ideas sound like a great place to start. Are you scribing for him at all other times? I know that scribing for my dd has helped her understand that I'm there to help her, I want to help her, and I'm GOING to help her. Maybe you could add up the time you spend writing for him, and compare that to the 12 minutes a day you are asking him to do. Might give him some perspective. :grouphug:!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 20, 2012 Author Share Posted February 20, 2012 I am curious if your son is able to make his own observations about himself. My son (now age 17)at first couldn't but as time goes on he is able to see what he needs to work on on his own. Not for the most part. He did come to me and ask if we could do something about his depression. I took him to a therapist and he was put on medication which has helped. But I don't think he recognizes other problem areas such as academics, sleep, and hygiene. Your 2-minute free writing and 10-minute typing ideas sound like a great place to start. Are you scribing for him at all other times? I handwrite his math notes as he works the problems on a dry erase board. I also take more notes in math than he thinks is necessary but he uses them when he takes his math tests. He types all other work and he no longer needs me to type for him. He uses 2 or 3 fingers and has gotten pretty good, but I know he would do so much better if he could touch type. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted February 21, 2012 Share Posted February 21, 2012 My ds 15 has found writing a whole new thing now that he can type well. It's worth the practice time. We are going back to handwriting as well. It's not easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heathermomster Posted February 21, 2012 Share Posted February 21, 2012 (edited) Private high schools and colleges all over the country allow their students to type and carry laptop computers. Many professionals type as well. Incorporate basic computer skills like how to use Excel and Power Point as you teach typing. He could present a project to you using Power Point. My 14 yo niece has done that for a public school English class. Typing is extremely common, not a set back. ETA: When I taught DS, we set a digital timer. The typing program that we used allowed us to set the typing speed low, something like 10wpm. It could have been lower, but how low is irrelevant. Stress ergonomics and accuracy. I used rewards. He typically practiced 20 minutes, with a break after the 1st 10 minutes. Typing will empower your DS. My son thanked me when it was all done. Edited February 21, 2012 by Heathermomster Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted February 21, 2012 Author Share Posted February 21, 2012 His first two days of handwriting and typing have gone well. Despite how upset he was when we first talked about it, he did the work with a cheerful attitude. He was surprised at how fast the 2 minutes went by when he was journaling. He only wrote one sentence. But today during the 2 minutes, he wrote two sentences and was pleased with himself! He said that he wants to move it up to 3 minutes tomorrow. So maybe this won't be so horrible after all. He likes the Typing Tutor program we have. It doesn't set the speed, it just clocks you as you type in a lesson or on a test. Since the time isn't counting down or anything, he's fine with it. I told him there was no rush to learn it all at once and he said he preferred to spend a couple of days or more if necessary on a lesson. Yesterday he did the 1st lesson twice and today he repeated that 1st lesson and did the 2nd lesson twice. I'm hoping as he learns more, his confidence will grow. I have a couple of books I'm reading on Aspies. One is how to develop at a talent into a career and the other is on life skills. Hopefully they will help too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happycc Posted February 21, 2012 Share Posted February 21, 2012 Keep at it! Yes perhaps you can continue adding in more minutes or sentences each time. But just stay consistent. Both he and you will soon see improvements! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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