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what to say to friend's "only cute to parent" photos


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As my mom used to say, "ugly in the cradle, pretty at the table." There is hope for every child.

 

That is so often true! Really awkward looking children many times grown into their looks to become very stunning adults. And on the flip side, how many times have we seen those "beautiful baby" actor/actresses who turn out really weird looking in adulthood.

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My kids are now fairly beautiful children, however, when a couple of them were born they were not pretty. Namely, the girls, the boys were instantly cute. I was not fooled by people who told me that they were so cute or pretty. They were not. Now by the time they were 3 or 4 months old they were pretty adorable, but those first few months were iffy.

 

Even when you don't think a baby is cute (and I have seen some ugly babies!) you should still make a positive comment. I think it is especially important to a mom with a less than cute baby to hear those affirmative things from people.

 

SO weird that they call you if you don't comment, though!

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I don't comment very much on FB. I am on FB maybe a total of 15 minutes per week. Not much at all. I couldn't imagine being hunted down on why I wasn't making comments. It has nothing to do with whether the baby is attractive or not. Actually, currently I don't have any friends with a baby and haven't had any in a few years.

 

On the attractiveness of babies- I think many babies are not very attractive and most newborns aren't. I don't gush about the kids but just say something like How nice, or how sweet or some such platititude. I know that just because I don't find most babies attractive doesn't mean they won't grow up a lot better looking and of course, has nothing to do with personality. My baby who was my least attractive turned out to be a gorgeous young lady.

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Our family has a code word for less attractive baby pictures. As my grandma said, "Every baby is precious, no matter what they look like." So we all took to pronouncing babies precious, when there wasn't anything one could honestly declare about their appearance.

 

It actually turned into a bit of a family joke, in which we siblings would call each other precious when we turned up with bed head or morning breath or a bad case of acne. Although, now that we are all grown, we have to be careful not to accidentally refer to any niece or nephew as precious. One of my more sensitive sisters even reminded us when pregnant with her first that we better never call her baby precious. :lol:

 

Nevertheless, for non-family folks, "precious" has come in handy many, many times.

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Honestly, my primary reason for posting pictures of DD is for my parents, who don't live locally and LOVE the pictures of DD at gymnastics, or dance, or whatever. I don't expect friends who have kids of their own to even LOOK at those pictures, unless of course their child was at the same event, in which case I'll probably tag them in the album so they can share the picture with THEIR out of area grandparents :).

 

:iagree: I have tons of family on fb who beg me for pictures. So I often post pictures. I would NEVER hound someone for comments! I could care less! However if someone feels bothered by me posting pictures then I would rather they "unfriend" me. I love looking at my friends' kids and all of their pictures. I hope that everyone on my friends list cares enough not to feel burdened by there being a picture of my kids. :confused:

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:iagree: I have tons of family on fb who beg me for pictures. So I often post pictures. I would NEVER hound someone for comments! I could care less! However if someone feels bothered by me posting pictures then I would rather they "unfriend" me. I love looking at my friends' kids and all of their pictures. I hope that everyone on my friends list cares enough not to feel burdened by there being a picture of my kids. :confused:

 

This is what I was thinking. I like looking at people's pics, but I don't particularly enjoy seeing a day-by-day progression. I don't put pictures of my kids up a lot, maybe 1 set for every season, 4x a year, but I put them up for grandparents and aunts who want to see. When FB asks if I want to post, I put no. Then I put a note on Grandma's wall or something. Then no one else knows I put pics up unless they're friends with both me and Grandma or they come to my wall.

 

Definitely just say "Precious" or something like that.

Edited by 3peasinapod
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