Eval meeting frustration - Need advice!

[Princess Peach]

I am really frustrated with trying to plan an evaluation meeting for DS8. We are working with the public schools. They have been great so far, but yesterday the case manager called to tell me that the meeting would be on a certain date and time next week that doesn't work for us. At all.

 

I called her today to reschedule and she told me they can only do Wednesdays for meetings. And the meetings have to be done by 3pm, so basically we're looking at a few hours per week in which to schedule the meeting, since it's a long one (her words). I want both DH and I to be there (which means DH getting a sub, most likely) and we would also like another person there who is a school psychologist (family member).

 

They are making this very difficult!! So basically, on paper, it looks like we have 3 weeks in which to have this meeting (and that is with an extension), but in reality, we are talking about 3 Wednesdays, one of which we cannot do (next week). Can they do this? And what do I do?:confused:

 

Did I mention I hate confrontation in any form, no matter how mild? I was stressed simply calling her to try and reschedule! :001_unsure:

[QueenCat]

If this is for special ed reasons, federal law requires them to meet with you at a mutually agreeable time. However, you might not have all the players you need from their side due to some positions having it in their contract that they are not required to stay past a certain time. Early in the game, I'd try to work with them on the time, as you want to save your battles for things like services, if that is what you are trying to achieve.

[chiguirre]

In my school district, you can do the meetings by phone. Would that work for you?

[Parrothead]

Turn it around on her. On paper. Write her a letter (or email) informing her that you, dh, and your professional will be at the meeting. Tell her that this date and time, this date and time along with this date and time (make sure one of them is a Wednesday before 3p) are when all members of your party will be available. Then put in there, please send back confirmation of which of the above dates and times will work for her and her staff.

 

The ball is in her court then to pick one. Any thing else just makes her look whitchy, and you have it documented.

[Princess Peach]

If this is for special ed reasons, federal law requires them to meet with you at a mutually agreeable time. However, you might not have all the players you need from their side due to some positions having it in their contract that they are not required to stay past a certain time. Early in the game, I'd try to work with them on the time, as you want to save your battles for things like services, if that is what you are trying to achieve.

 

Yes, I was thinking this too. I do not want to burn any bridges. We could make it work to have both DH and I there, it's having my BIL there that is difficult. My DH insists he be there. I would let it go. I'll have to talk to DH further if we have no other option.

 

 

In my school district, you can do the meetings by phone. Would that work for you?

 

I asked about Skype, it was a no-go. But phone would be something I could look into.

 

Turn it around on her. On paper. Write her a letter (or email) informing her that you, dh, and your professional will be at the meeting. Tell her that this date and time, this date and time along with this date and time (make sure one of them is a Wednesday before 3p) are when all members of your party will be available. Then put in there, please send back confirmation of which of the above dates and times will work for her and her staff.

 

The ball is in her court then to pick one. Any thing else just makes her look whitchy, and you have it documented.

 

Thanks, that's a really good idea. She seems like a nice woman, but she was annoyed when I called to reschedule today. She said they already sent a letter out, that we had a whole team involved, blah, blah, blah. I get that, I really do, but I don't have BIL's schedule in my head, I had to call him. And yesterday when she called to tell me the meeting time, she was dismissive and rushed off the phone.

 

I have an email into BIL to see what he can do. Then I will email her. I think having it in writing will be beneficial.

 

Thanks everyone!!

[katilac]

I honestly think that "pick one of the next 3 Wednesdays" is fairly reasonable. It's tough to schedule so many people, so having the meetings on set days makes sense. That way, one "side" of the meeting is always precoordinated, which is easier by far than trying to coordinate both sides on a case-by-case basis.

 

Have you checked with dh and the other family member yet to see if the other Wednesdays might work?

[Princess Peach]

I honestly think that "pick one of the next 3 Wednesdays" is fairly reasonable. It's tough to schedule so many people, so having the meetings on set days makes sense. That way, one "side" of the meeting is always precoordinated, which is easier by far than trying to coordinate both sides on a case-by-case basis.

 

Have you checked with dh and the other family member yet to see if the other Wednesdays might work?

 

Yes! I got a date from my BIL and talked to the case manager and it works for her, so she is going to check with the others. Hopefully it will work out!

 

I do understand that picking a set day of the week is not unreasonable. It just narrows down the available days considerably and makes it very difficult. "We have to meet sometime before Oct 1" seems a lot more doable than "We have to meet one of two Wednesdays", kwim?

[katilac]

Yes! I got a date from my BIL and talked to the case manager and it works for her, so she is going to check with the others. Hopefully it will work out!

 

I do understand that picking a set day of the week is not unreasonable. It just narrows down the available days considerably and makes it very difficult. "We have to meet sometime before Oct 1" seems a lot more doable than "We have to meet one of two Wednesdays", kwim?

 

Oh, I definitely know what you mean! I guess I've just come around to the view that, when beaucracy is involved, one might as well bow to the inevitable and suck up the pain, lol. It seems like a shared calendar type of thing (online) is what's needed here, but that would make too much sense.