When do you "stop"?

[hsbaby]

Well, my dd is now 14. We are creeping up on your average graduating age of 18. Yes, I know, I've got four years......but, it just goes by so fast! She is on the spectrum and currently working at a second grade level across the board. Obviously she won't be graduating with a real diploma or GED. I think she will get a certificate of completion.

 

My question is, when do you stop formal schooling? When she's 18? I can't imagine stopping in four years. I guess I have not come to terms with the possibility she won't progress much past an elementary level education. It would feel so weird to give up. What in the world would she do? I guess we could look into adult services such as life skills training, job placement, etc.

 

I apologize if I am making no sense. It's late and I'm in one of those panicky "What is going to happen to her as an adult" modes. Anyone here graduate a special needs child yet? If not, do you plan on schooling them past 18?

[Love_to_Read]

I haven't been there yet....our dd's needs are more mild and she's still younger...but I do know that on her public school IEP before we pulled her home, there was mention that they start exploring career plans at age 13 or 14. Not that you need to look to PS for cues, but just saying, some people do start thinking about this at this age.

 

I think you should go for however long you seem to still be making progress, but in the meanwhile, any time in the next 4yrs, it's probably not too early to incorporate things. For example, I graduated with a girl who had a real heart for animals and small children, so she was placed as a volunteer working with them as a high school elective, and later did work as a daycare assistant while living at home as an adult. When I volunteered in a high school autism class, there were fieldtrips to go grocery shopping and other life skills that might lead to a job or to increased independence at home.

 

I don't think you can guess yet where she'll level out if she's still learning and progressing now, but if you see anything that interests her that she could visit more, or notice any additional life skills is ready to learn, or if you think she might need additonal savings to survive if anything happens to you...it's probably better to start working those things in gradually than a crash course at 17yo lest she suddenly decide to move in with a friend or something on her 18th birthday.

 

I think it's awesome that you're already looking into this, and that she'll be off to a great start, whether her life changes at 18 or continues on with homeschooling for additional years beyond that.

[Tarreymere]

My twenty year old is 'done' this year, mainly because we are working with OVR for sustainable employment and looking at more independent living situations. His physical issues are a lot more signifigant than his intellectual ones but he really benefited from two more years of formal education IMO. I don't think you have to be done at age eighteen.

[hsbaby]

Thank you both for your input. I think I will start looking into adult services in the area. Sadly, it's possible she may have already leveled out with her academics. We seem to have hit a wall a few years ago and she just can't get past the concrete material of the lower grades to the more abstract, critical thinking levels that upper elementary and beyond requires. Not to mention, she despises school and has zero motivation to learn. There are more tears in her school day than I can count.

 

Anyway, thank you again for your input and advice. I think I may start to really hit the three "r's" with her this year while exploring adult services. If anyone would have told me when she was 6 or 7 thatshe would make such limited progress, I wouldn't have believed them. I really thought that she would end up higher functioning that she is. It just makes me sad for her:(

[SonshineMama]

Just want to give a hug ((hug)) I am sure this is so hard. :grouphug:

[SweetMissMagnolia]

:grouphug: are there any programs like for work training in your community? in our town there is a place where people with "special needs" get training---and I'm pretty sure they have a place where they train them for certain jobs and then help them with the job situation--meaning that whatever the job is it's like under the "umbrella" of the program--sorry if it doesn't make sense-I'll try to see if I can find a link to the one in our town and post it..............

 

I would keep teaching her until she was old enough or able to get into the work program like I described above (if it's available in your area)...... :grouphug:

[chiguirre]

You can start looking at the public school. Here in TX sn kids attend until they are 22. There really isn't anything other than ps services until then. After age 22, our cc system offers job training programs. Special Olympics is a great social outlet and a lot of fun. It will also give you a good source of information and support.

 

Ds1 is on track for these services, even though he's in a private school. It's not too hard to follow along this path once you start it. His academics are similar to your dds, but I do think he'll find employment in a sheltered environment (or at least I hope so). Ds2 is harder to call. Since his great passion is to be a mechanic, I think he'll attend public high school, but a lot can change in 5 years.

[momtotkbb]

When I was in the ps we had dc w/ special needs that were provided educational and vocational services until age 21. At 21 most had transferred over to some type of Voc Rehab training program and VR helped to place them in a "work" environment.

[wy_kid_wrangler04]

I would not stop at 18 if you are not comfortable with it. I would get her basic math facts down (addition, subtraction, multiplication, division and fractions) then do something similar to this and maybe some of the money matters books (they have one for kids around 8-10 years old I believe is the first? Maybe start with that one) to make sure she has those basic life skills she will need once in a job. Yes I would also look into the job placement and training possibilities that are available.