Neighbors and balls going out of their yard into our fenced yard.

[laundrycrisis]

The next time they come by, let them know you're busy at the moment but will toss the toys over when you're out in the yard X amount of time later. If they ask if they can go get it themselves repeat that no, you're too busy right now but you'll toss them over later.... repeat as necessary. If they find they have to wait four hours for their toys they'll likely become a little better about watching out for their toys in the first place. And maybe if it gets to be a rare occurance, you won't feel so bothered to drop what you're doing and help them out in the moment.

 

:thumbup1:

[laundrycrisis]

You sound like a grump of a neighbor.;)

 

 

I guess this is a hazard of life in a community with kids.

 

Then I guess I am a grump too. I do not like to be repeatedly disrupted by neighbor kids. I also will not allow our children to pester our neighbors. IMO it violates their enjoyment of their home, and that's not okay. Things will happen once in a while but it's not respectful for it to go on and on. When we do need to bother them, we always apologize. They do likewise. It's really nice when neighbors respect each others' space.

[momma aimee]

I guess I don't understand. My kids have lost things over the fence while I am out there supervising and while we were trying to have control of the item. The frisbee didn't go the way we thought it would, the paper airplane caught the wind and so did the beach ball. Sometimes when kids play the ball (or something else) doesn't go where it was expected.

 

We do go to the park to play much of the time, but part of the expectation of having a yard is that we can play in it. Our yard is only so big and we really can't play that far from one fence or another. I suppose it depends on how often the ball is coming over the fence, but I would try really hard to not let this be a big deal.

 

I agree, I guess I do not see what the problem that you are trying to nip is -- they knock, they ask nicely -- they are kids .. that is doing pretty good IMO. :)

 

I don't see what the problem is -- kids are kids -- they are not being rude, distructive, mean or crude or ....

 

frankly -- if people do not want to deal with other people -- go live on 33 acres , we do and i can't SEE the 'house next door' -- and it sucks -- i'd love to have the kids next door, nicely, knocking on the door daily --

[Cheryl in NM]

I agree, I guess I do not see what the problem that you are trying to nip is -- they knock, they ask nicely -- they are kids .. that is doing pretty good IMO. :)

 

I don't see what the problem is -- kids are kids -- they are not being rude, distructive, mean or crude or ....

 

frankly -- if people do not want to deal with other people -- go live on 33 acres , we do and i can't SEE the 'house next door' -- and it sucks -- i'd love to have the kids next door, nicely, knocking on the door daily --

 

It is my understanding that this is happening several times a day on many days. I agree, that occasionally it's not a problem, but I know sometimes it seems that I spend all day answering the door.

[2cents]

I'm not the OP, but with our dog, there's no way I'd give anyone permission to come in and out of the yard.

 

She's friendly, but a) protective of her family, b) I don't want to be chasing her down the street if someone lets her out, always a possibility and c) she's huge. An enthusiastic greeting could knock a kid flying.

 

In today's sue happy world, giving anyone permission to come in and out of the yard where there are dogs is a lawsuit waiting to happen, imo.

 

:iagree::iagree::iagree: Giving permission could be a slippery slope.

[Margo out of lurking]

I don't think it's "grumpy" to expect consideration from neighbors and expect that they won't bother you repeatedly with the same request. Nor is it rude to stop agreeing to immediately return the balls they continue to throw over. If their backyard is really that small, they perhaps should find toys that are more neighbor-friendly.

 

I'd be embarrassed if my kids had to knock on someone's door more than once every month or two to get a ball. I can't imagine thinking it was okay for my kids to impose on someone a few times a day.

 

Yes, I live in a neighborhood. But so do my neighbors. The consideration works both ways. They are the ones imposing; they can do whatever is necessary to minimize disrupting you.

 

Kindly telling the kids that you will just return the balls when you happen to go outside is a neighborly, appropriate response. You can still be nice without bowing to unreasonable demands.:001_smile:

[MelanieM]

Everybody keeps talking about this being multiple times every day, but the OP didn't actually say how often this is happening, just that it's happening often enough to annoy her. Just pointing out that it's possible people are jumping to conclusions with this multiple times a day thing... or not.

[Virg]

I feel horrible now! At our last house our yard was small-med and the three boys accidentally hit/threw balls over the fence all the time!. I even stopped letting them use frisbees and bought a wiffle ball for them to try and curtail it. I know they were always nice but we really didn't mean to annoy anyone. They are boys and were trying to keep them in our yard. One neighbor gave them standing permission (we watched their baby every day) and the other would always let tell them when they knocked to go in the backyard and get it for themselves.

 

I will say that it wasn't every day since we were in Oregon and playing ball in the rain isn't the most fun :lol: Now that we have a house with a really big yard in hasn't happened once in the six weeks we have been here!

[Margo out of lurking]

I feel horrible now! At our last house our yard was small-med and the three boys accidentally hit/threw balls over the fence all the time!. I even stopped letting them use frisbees and bought a wiffle ball for them to try and curtail it. I know they were always nice but we really didn't mean to annoy anyone. They are boys and were trying to keep them in our yard. One neighbor gave them standing permission (we watched their baby every day) and the other would always let tell them when they knocked to go in the backyard and get it for themselves.

 

But that's the difference! You had a closer relationship with one of the neighbors, and the circumstances of the other made it possible for you to go into their yards to get their balls. The OP has dogs, so she understandably isn't comfortable with the kids going in on their own.

 

There's no reason to feel horrible.:grouphug:

[laundrycrisis]

It's not about the object over the fence. It's about interrupting us multiple times by laying on the door bell while we're trying to do our thing. Rinse, repeat. If we are out and see it go over, we toss it back. If we are out and see something that is not ours, we toss it over. I don't understand why they can't play with another ball until we are out in our yard again and return it?

 

The OP did specify that it is happening multiple times each day and is disruptive to what she is trying to do in her own home with her own kids. I have also experienced this. I have become a grouch about it. I need the use of my home without constant disruption by other people's children.

 

Now, in the summer, I put a sign on the door - school in session - please don't knock. I also use the sign once school begins in the fall when it's time for the bus to arrive in the afternoon and kids will be around again. For any kid who knocks when the sign is up - I will answer the first time and ask them to please come back later when the sign is down. If they knock again I do not answer. I cannot reward constant knocking. We have three dogs and two of them go off barking for five minutes every single time someone knocks. The doorbell - disconnected. When I am done with what we are doing inside I take the sign down and send the kids out. The sign has been effective and saved my sanity. It took a few experiences for the neighbor kids to learn to take it seriously but now they understand they will not get anything from our household when the sign is up.

[unsinkable]

Everybody keeps talking about this being multiple times every day, but the OP didn't actually say how often this is happening, just that it's happening often enough to annoy her. Just pointing out that it's possible people are jumping to conclusions with this multiple times a day thing... or not.

 

Yeah...myabe I am missing it. Michele does say multiple times but doesn't really say each day, does she?

 

:confused:

 

Or I am the only one who doesn't understand that it is assumed to be multiple times each day (besides you, Melanie!)

[justasque]

...construct some kind of ... structure

 

My relatives play tennis in their suburban backyard. To keep the lost ball problem down, they added additional chicken wire above their regular fence, then grew a hedge that engulfed both fence and extension (to make it more attractive). They keep the hedge well-trimmed, on both their side and the neighbors' sides. It's worked well for 35 years or so.

 

The OP's situation can probable be solved without construction, but it is certainly an option.

[twoforjoy]

Why can't the parents supervise their children and tell them to either play further away from our fence (which is already ten foot inside our property) or control the ball better?

 

I wouldn't assume parental negligence is the issue. I've never been out with kids, particularly young kids, in a yard with a ball, even if there were numerous adults around, when at some point the ball didn't end up going over a fence. It happens.

 

I think it's perfectly appropriate, if it's happening a lot, to say that you'll return the balls once a day, or once a week, whatever makes sense for you. But, it just seems to be one of those things that happens when you have adjacent yards.

[LibraryLover]

Put in a gate so they can get it themselves?

Edited May 25, 2011 by LibraryLover