Celia Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 I'm sorry, please pardon me for coming on to the board with so little of substance to say, but just complaining. I just have no one IRL who can empatize with these worries I'm having about my kids. My ds6 has symptoms of Aspergers or High Functioning Autism, or something that I just can't figure out. His recent OT assessment wasn't very encouraging, although he is making strides with his lower body, the conclusion is that he's likely to continue falling behind with upper body and fine motor skill stuff He's also having vision problems, and underwent an electroretinogram recently, which I don't have the results for yet, and am hugely concerned about. His melt downs are happening several times daily. I'm so tired of it. His psych-ed/autism spectrum assessment is coming up mid April, and as I go through his medical notes and get things ready, I'm just grieving what a difficult life he's had. And to make it all that much worse, the more I google and try and work through what symptoms he's shown through his life, I find myself panicking about my youngest ds. Today is his 2nd b-day. He has 2 words, if you count uh-oh and ewww words. He has fascinations with doors, light switches, and this morning he spent a good portion of time taking all the nintendo games out of the box and lining them up on the shelf. He's due for a regular check up now, and I've been holding off on making it, because I really can't handle any more bad news, if there is some to be heard. I feel like I've been worrying constantly about the welfare of my kids for the last couple months. I'm exhausted, yet stay up late on the internet reading about what could possibly be. Last night I lay in bed for hours unable to sleep. Then when I did sleep, I was woken shortly after because of having nightmares about it. Oftentimes I'm in tears, emotional about everything, and usually I'm somewhat sick with a cold because I'm not getting proper rest. I'm sure some of you must have been where I'm at now. Thanks for listening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LizzyBee Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: It is normal to go through a grieving process when we realize that our kids may not have the lives we envisioned for them. Just keep taking one step at a time. Learn all you can about your kids' disorders and diagnoses, because knowledge is power! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendi Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 Hang in there! You're not alone. I know how emotionally draining it is to deal with meltdowns, and see things being so difficult for your kid when they seem easy for other kids. It will be helpful when you have more information. And know that there are people on these boards who know how you feel! :grouphug: Wendi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElizabethB Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 And to make it all that much worse, the more I google and try and work through what symptoms he's shown through his life, I find myself panicking about my youngest ds. Today is his 2nd b-day. He has 2 words, if you count uh-oh and ewww words. He has fascinations with doors, light switches, and this morning he spent a good portion of time taking all the nintendo games out of the box and lining them up on the shelf. He's due for a regular check up now, and I've been holding off on making it, because I really can't handle any more bad news, if there is some to be heard. . :grouphug: Both my kids did all those behaviors and turned out fine. My daughter was talking very well, but my son was not saying much at 2. I would limit the 2 year old's TV and computer time, though, and completely remove time if he has a hard time turning away from the screen while watching. The TV/rain/cable study did show a correlation between TV time and autism rates, and my friends with autistic boys all say their boys cannot turn away from the TV. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dobela Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug: Juggling the needs of one special child is tough, and having concerns about another is overwhelming.:grouphug: One, stop googling. It just makes things worse. Believe me, I know. BTDT. Just look at your child and note what you are seeing. With appropriate therapies the diagnosis can change and the outcome can be dramatically different than what google has you imagining. Where I imagined 2 years ago my son would be today, and the reality of where he actually is are light years apart. Two, if the youngest is showing signs, absolutely get an appointment and ask for evals. Better address any concerns now than waiting. I saw many kids receive therapy at that age then never need it again. You mentioned vision problems - have you been to www.covd.org and reviewed the signs and symptoms page? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merry gardens Posted February 28, 2011 Share Posted February 28, 2011 :grouphug: Hugs and prayers for the original poster! :grouphug: Both my kids did all those behaviors and turned out fine. My daughter was talking very well, but my son was not saying much at 2. I would limit the 2 year old's TV and computer time, though, and completely remove time if he has a hard time turning away from the screen while watching. The TV/rain/cable study did show a correlation between TV time and autism rates, and my friends with autistic boys all say their boys cannot turn away from the TV. I hadn't heard of that study. Thanks for mentioning it. I looked for that study after you wrote that because it relates to some concerns I've had lately. (Off topic--maybe I'll start a different thread.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Celia Posted March 2, 2011 Author Share Posted March 2, 2011 Thanks ladies :) I just needed to get that out, I guess. Other than dh, I just haven't felt like talking about these worries to anyone IRL yet. And yes, I will stop googling, at least for a week or two until I calm down ;) So nice to have handy a group of people who really get it, knowing the ups and downs that comes with this territory! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 :grouphug: :grouphug: I've been where you are. It's so hard. I know. I have two kids only. My son is profoundly Autistic and my daughter is Asperger's, OCD and ADHD. I remember crying A LOT and not sleeping A LOT. Shoot I still cry and don't sleep, but I guess you get kind of "used" to it? Sometimes you just have to take it a day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time, sometimes just a minute at a time. I don't know what else can tell you that will give you comfort. Just know that you're not alone. :grouphug: :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElizabethB Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 Thanks ladies :) I just needed to get that out, I guess. Other than dh, I just haven't felt like talking about these worries to anyone IRL yet. And yes, I will stop googling, at least for a week or two until I calm down ;) :grouphug: I also do not recommend reading anything about attention disorders with a 3 year old boy in the house! When my son was 3, I was reading "The Complete Handbook of Reading Disorders." Almost the last half of the book was about reading disorders combined with various types of attention disorders, and the author described each type and gave symptoms. I had to keep telling myself "This is for a school age child. My 3 year old is fine." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
merry gardens Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 :grouphug: I also do not recommend reading anything about attention disorders with a 3 year old boy in the house! When my son was 3, I was reading "The Complete Handbook of Reading Disorders." Almost the last half of the book was about reading disorders combined with various types of attention disorders, and the author described each type and gave symptoms. I had to keep telling myself "This is for a school age child. My 3 year old is fine." With my oldest was that age, I remember reading a book called "Oh No! Maybe My Child is Normal!" I can't remember anything about the book except the title, and it brought me comfort. I totally get that there are some children who's behavior is so far off the charts that they deserve a diagnosis and need special treatment. I have a son with some special needs, so I get it and I'm not pointing fingers at any of you. BUT... as a psychologist PhD friend of mine has said, if you look hard enough, you can find a diagnosis for EVERYONE. I see bits and pieces of various disorders in all of my children--and most of them are perfectly normal children. Children being the operative word. Sometimes I think the rise diagnosing childhood behavior issues is because we look at childish behavior and say, "This can't be normal!" No, it's not normal behavior for an adult, but sometimes it's perfectly normal behavior for children. I suggest that the op watch for problems, and be aware of them, but don't panic. Your child might simply be a child--and that will not last forever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niffercoo Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 (edited) :grouphug: The TV/rain/cable study did show a correlation between TV time and autism rates, and my friends with autistic boys all say their boys cannot turn away from the TV. Good grief. Watching TV does not cause autism. http://aut2bhomeincarolina.blogspot.com/2006/10/she-turned-me-into-newt-or-why-tv-does.html http://aut2bhomeincarolina.blogspot.com/2006/10/happily-ever-after-for-some-or-why-tv.html http://aut2bhomeincarolina.blogspot.com/2006/10/tale-of-two-doctors-or-why-tv-does-not.html Edited March 2, 2011 by Niffercoo Added links Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeidiD Posted March 3, 2011 Share Posted March 3, 2011 psychologist PhD friend of mine has said, if you look hard enough, you can find a diagnosis for EVERYONE. Yes!!! :iagree: And not just kids, either! Plenty of adults have those "bits and pieces" as well. Our society is so focused on achieving perfection, and the flip side is that we analyze everything and everybody to death. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mergath Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 :grouphug: It's so hard when you have a young child at risk for autism, and all you can do is sit and wait. My dd has a genetic disorder that left her with a one in three chance of ending up on the spectrum. She was only saying a couple of words right before she turned two. She didn't even start walking until eighteen months. She didn't have great eye contact, and I spent every day freaking out. I just knew she was going to be autistic, and since I work with autistic children at my job, that made it even worse. Now, at two years and nine months , she has a vocabulary of seven hundred words and is making five and six word sentences. They can change almost overnight. I know how hard it is, though, to stay objective when you see autism on a daily basis. And with the internet trying to scare the living crap out of you. My dd can spend an hour arranging books, too, just for the record. Lining things up is normal for kids this age. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mission-Driven-Mom Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 My kids, as well, have had challenges... It's hard, confusing, and exhausting when you are in the thick! You're right, you are not alone...:grouphug: I encourage you to cover them with prayer, just love them through it all, get their little bodies healthy from the inside out (find a DAN! doctor to help you), and try to help yourself too. We have seen great strides in our home with this recipe...there is hope! Prayers for you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mission-Driven-Mom Posted March 4, 2011 Share Posted March 4, 2011 Yes!!! :iagree: And not just kids, either! Plenty of adults have those "bits and pieces" as well. Our society is so focused on achieving perfection, and the flip side is that we analyze everything and everybody to death. :) LOL...so true! :iagree: Not to mention our growing toxic world...it's causing all kinds of things to manifest...in everyone!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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