Son driving me nuts

[Haiku]

Please help me. My son is making me crazy. He's a sweet kid, but he feels the need to comment on or ask questions about EVERYTHING I do. Any conversation I have with anyone else, he butts in to ask a question about it. Anything I look at on the computer, he runs over to have a look (in fact, if he is in another room and he hears me watching something on the computer, he will run in from the other room). If I pick up a book, he asks me what book it is, what it's about, and what I plan to do with it. If I head toward the bathroom, he asks me where I am going. If I talk to someone on the phone or text someone, he asks me who it is. He hangs out in the kitchen while I cook and asks me 40 questions about what I am doing. He will ask me 40 times what time we are leaving to go somewhere. He will ask me 40 times when it will be time to watch a certain tv show. He's making me absolutely crazy. Nothing I have said to him about it has had any effect.

 

Tara

[Peela]

That would drive me nuts too!

Is he really craving the attention? Can you give him 100% focused attention for a while, fill up his love bucket, then tell him you need some space to yourself- and enforce that? Is he insecure or just really curious?

[Night Elf]

Yeah, that would drive me nuts too. Have you asked him directly what the intense sudden interest in you is about? I wonder if he would have an answer? Maybe try asking him a question when he asks you one? If he asks so many, you might have to pull some random ones out, like schoolish ones:

 

What's 10 x 5?

How do you spell 'insert word here'?

What was the name of that giant structure that the Greeks gave to the Trojans?

 

:tongue_smilie:

[*********]

Zee gets kinda like that sometimes. Only it's not so much asking me questions, but informing me of every.single.detail of everything he thinks, says, or does. Seriously. Every excruciating detail until I'm sitting there screaming in my head 'WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS?!'

 

Sorry.

 

Anywho...

 

It drives me a little crazy, LOL. I love him to BITS. I love to hear what he thinks about things, I love to talk to him. But I don't need to know that he set his cup on the counter, and now he's going to go to the bathroom. Ok son, just go ahead, no need to tell me.

 

I talk to him about it, and try to explain that while mommy loves him very much, and he can talk to me about anything at anytime, there are some things that I just don't *need* to know. Kinda like he lacks an 'importance' filter in his brain, and I'm trying to help him develop one.

 

I love that kid. But I don't need to know that he blew his nose, then he's gonna use a blue crayon, then he thinks he'll get a drink of water. :tongue_smilie:

[TKDmom]

Is this your 9yo? Because my 9yo does this to a lesser degree. :glare: I'm tired of saying "MYOB!"

 

I remember my mom yelling at me for sticking my nose in her business and correcting her when I was 10....

[Robin M]

Yes, I have one like that. Must know what is going on every step of the way. Must talk. We went to a funeral the other day. I told him if he had to talk to me during the service, he would need to whisper. We arrive and the whispering starts, asking about the church, pastor, and just general conversation. After multiple sh's from both myself and husband, finally told him. My telling you to whisper didn't give you permission to talk through the entire service. Be quiet.

 

"Oh!"

 

Even when you tell the child it's none of your business, He just NEEDS to know what's going on. I've established a few boundaries with him. Such as not allowed to look over my shoulder when I'm on the computer. And no I don't care to watch another cat or fill in the blank you tube video, thank you.

 

By the way has anybody seen the youtube video's of the "Annoying Orange." My hubby introduced son to that. Just had to ban it. Run, don't walk away, fast. Oh my head!.

 

Once I leave his room at night after prayers, he's no longer allowed to get up, ask questions, find out what's going on in the household, what are we watching etc. This has to be reinforced every few days with a big reminder.

 

You just need to set some times when questions aren't allowed or give him a question limit and the rest he'll have to save for later. I've begun telling my son when we go places, save the why's and whats for after it's over and I'll explain then. It works - sometimes.

 

And.. "he's off to poop." Thanks for sharing.

 

You gotta love boys!

[Haiku]

No, it's my 8 year old. I think he is a bit insecure. He was in an orphanage until he came to us, and he has always been somewhat sensitive to being left out or feeling shafted. But there is only so much I can do, ya know? I make sure that I tell him and demonstrate that he is a valued and important member of the family, and I don't know how he could feel like he's not getting enough attention because I am home with my kids ALL DAY. Sometimes I feel like I have trained my kids to be attention whores by always being here, kwim?

 

I just want some sense of a private life and not to feel like Iam somehow accountable to my son for everything I think or do, and I want him to understand that some things are just not. his. business.

 

Yesterday I took him to the pulmonologist. We stopped by my 16 year old's doctor (16 year old was not with us) to get a "hat" for her to poop in because she needs to provide some stool samples. I put the "hat" in a paper bag and folded the top down. I didn't feel the need to tell my younger kids what was in there because, really, it's none. of. their. business. and dd16 probably wouldn't want them to know what she has to do. My son asked me no less than SEVEN times in 15 minutes what was in the bag. Even after I told him, "It's something your sister needs and it DOESN'T CONCERN YOU!" ARRRRGGGHHH!

 

Tara