vlgimmelli Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Hello, Anyone have suggestions on how to gain your 11 year old respect back. My son who is 11, and on the autistic spectrum is very disrespectful to me. He laugh in my face and when told to do something he says no and doesn't listen. He just laughs at us. He has no respect for his parents especially me(his mother). Lately, all I do is cry daily. He constantly making funny noises making fun of what we say. I have taken his computer privileges away and he seems to get worse and cries like a 2 year old. I am at my wits end and do not know what to do to regain his respect or to at least have him be a respectful child. Please, please if anyone can give me some suggestions that I can do right now to help me mentally and emotionally and also to help him be the child he should be. Thank you and praying a lot. Lillian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TechWife Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 You might want to cross-post this to the special needs board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tap Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Honestly, I would get to a Behavior Therapist ASAP. Dd4 goes to a BT and she has helped us so much. She not only helps to give me suggestions on how to parent dd4, she helps me to see things from dd4s point of view and to change the way she perceives things OR alter my behavior accordingly. She role plays with dd4 to help her gain understanding and she points out the small milestones or touchstones for her development that are nice for me to see. She will also do private sessions for my other kids, understanding the unique home situation they have with having an adopted little sis with mental issues. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted January 8, 2011 Share Posted January 8, 2011 Honestly, I would get to a Behavior Therapist ASAP. Dd4 goes to a BT and she has helped us so much. :iagree::iagree: I was going to say the same exact thing. That's exactly the types of behaviors they deal with. Good luck to you hon. Raising Autistic Spectrum kids is challenging to say the least. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted January 9, 2011 Share Posted January 9, 2011 I've not dealt with that type of behavior, but I have had to deal with other kinds of issues. What worked with my Aspie is plainly talking with no emotion. I had to explain that he was going to have to learn there were some things that just weren't acceptable whether he agreed or not. I gave an example of people cutting in front of someone else in a line. It isn't illegal but it is clearly a very rude behavior. These types of social skills do not come easily to Aspies. I agree with the others that a behavior therapist might be in order, but if for some reason you cannot do that, you need to remember to deal with him unemotionally. Do you have another child? If so, have him/her help you run through some scenarios with the incorrect behavior while your Aspie watches. Then talk about what he saw and how he interpreted it. Next, do it again with a more appropriate behavior and talk about it some more. One book that my son loved was The Social Skills Picture Book. I would also talk to him about how his words and behaviors affect others negatively. But I would talk with him when he's calm and receptive, not in the middle of the type of behavior you are trying to stop. My son never responded to privileges being taken away, except when I messed with his bedtime. He hated to go to bed early. But that was when he was very young. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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