New to board and recent diagnosis of Aspergers

[SandiM]

Hi,

 

I have been home educating my kids from the get go following the WTM with a few detours :o). This year I am heading into grade 5 with my oldest, grade 2 with my 7 yr old son who was just diagnosed with Aspergers. Honestly, before my son started any formal school i thought I new what I was doing LOL! My daughter has taken to classical approach so easily and well...until this last year. I think it was all the stress with my sons behaviors. I also have a 22 month old baby boy...he just follows us around looks cute and gets into everything.

 

My question is mostly related to teaching my Aspie son. He is SO resistant to learning. They did mention he may have some learning disabilities on top of the autism. We are starting some ABA/CBT in a few weeks to address some social/emotion issues.

 

I am struggling to find the right learning material for my boy. I am most interested in hearing what others have used with their Aspie's in the area of math and reading and why it worked for you.

 

We did try RS which is some ways he understands but the ALL the manipulatives seem to distract him. We are at his pace going through a Singapore wkbk because the pictorial really works for him but I am not sure it is enough.

 

And he reads but its rote and not a whole lot of comprehension yet he has an adult vocabulary.

 

Thanks for any input you can offer.

[elise1mds]

We are using Math-U-See for math, and it seems to work. The pages are black-and-white, so there are few distractions. There are manipulatives, but if he doesn't want to use them, he doesn't have to. My boy only uses them until he gets a concept and then leaves them behind. I still sometimes have to explain things five and six times because it takes a while for it all to sink in. Math is his least favorite subject even now, but he doesn't scream when I mention math... unless I break out index cards, but I learned my lesson there.

 

I have nothing for reading. I took Dr. Seuss books and put a sticker on each page that he was able to read, and when he had a sticker on every page, he got the book to keep. I also found a lot of leveled reading books on subjects he was interested in - bugs, dinosaurs, space, volcanos, etc. (Scholastic is my BEST friend in this area) - and helped him get through those. He loves reading now and can read anything under the sun. Comprehension comes with ease of reading; he'll get there :)

 

Good luck with the therapy!

[Greta Lea]

Hi,

 

I have been home educating my kids from the get go following the WTM with a few detours :o). This year I am heading into grade 5 with my oldest, grade 2 with my 7 yr old son who was just diagnosed with Aspergers.

 

 

My son was 7yo when we got the official dx of Asperger syndrome (he's 16yo now).

 

My question is mostly related to teaching my Aspie son. He is SO resistant to learning. They did mention he may have some learning disabilities on top of the autism. We are starting some ABA/CBT in a few weeks to address some social/emotion issues.

 

My son had no trouble learning to read. What I used to teach him to read usually does not work well with a child who is struggling to learn to read.

 

He DOES have a math LD. He will be in 10th grade in the fall and we are still working on fractions, percents and decimals. Over the years, we've used Saxon, Math-U-See, Rod and Staff, Teaching Textbooks and now the Key To books. Honestly, he's learned from all of them, but hit a wall with all of these programs too.

 

I do know what you mean about the manipulatives being distracting. He has always needed the manipulative work, but they do distract him. I wish I could say I found the answer for math, but I haven't:(

 

I am struggling to find the right learning material for my boy. I am most interested in hearing what others have used with their Aspie's in the area of math and reading and why it worked for you.

 

We did try RS which is some ways he understands but the ALL the manipulatives seem to distract him. We are at his pace going through a Singapore wkbk because the pictorial really works for him but I am not sure it is enough.

 

And he reads but its rote and not a whole lot of comprehension yet he has an adult vocabulary.

 

My son hasn't struggled in this area, but I've heard this is very common in Aspies. I wish I could be more help. For us there's been a LOT of trial and error. The main thing I did for my son during those elem. years was read aloud to him a LOT. He stayed in the picture book stage much longer than his peers did, but I'm glad now I didn't push him on to chapter books too soon. He is 16yo and still prefers books with great pictures and photos.

 

Thanks for any input you can offer.

 

I wish I could more help, but honestly no two Aspies are the same.

[sparrow]

I wish I could more help, but honestly no two Aspies are the same.

 

 

:iagree: It seems it is a constant process of trial and error.

 

We also use MathUSee. It's the only math program we've ever used and ds doesn't hate math, so I stick with it *despite* the fact that ds has a diagnosed math LD and I still have to go over, and over, and over, and over things with him :001_smile:. I did find that ds has an easier time associating pictures with math facts, so we try to incorporate visual cues for multiplication facts. He also has difficulty writing, as in, he will say the correct answer to a math problem and write the wrong number. Sometimes I just let him dictate math answers to me and I write them.

 

Reading came slower than I expected, since he started decoding at age 2.5 years, but he really started hitting his stride at 9 years. We didn't use a special reading program, just TONS and tons of reading by me and him.

 

Writing/spelling has been our biggest struggle. He also has a diagnosed language LD. He can do his grammar work and diagram a sentence like a pro, but when I had him trying to write, it was a disaster. I remember reading a post from JennW in SoCal about how her son's writing seemed to click around 12 years old and she was taking mostly dictation from him during that time. The stars aligned and I realized, "duh, let him dictate or type". Since that time, ds is MUCH less stressed (me, too!) and his work improved 1,000 fold. We started All About Spelling and that also seems to be working for him.

 

You're going to find yourself trying lots of different things and being surprised at what does, and doesn't, work. Just go with the flow, don't stress, and let your ds guide you.

[Food4Thought]

I wish I could more help, but honestly no two Aspies are the same.

 

I have to agree with this too.

 

I've switched to Math Mammoth for Math, but it's because my DS really *loves* math, and likes having lots of problems to practice with. Singapore had too much color so he got overstimulated trying to figure it out.

 

We're still working our way through reading. My son is very rules-based, so I work through phonics rules with him. I absolutely can't push him, so it's a slow process - but he's getting better about decoding every day. I don't do any formal system.

 

I read at least 3 books out loud to both kids every single day, so they are interested and love reading. DS will work hard decoding words from a book he likes, so I just work to get something interesting in front of him every day. I never force him to read out loud though - just encourage him when he does do it.

 

Oh, and DS *loves* the Between the Lions games at PBSKids.org. He's learned a lot of the phonics blends from there.

 

When I went to DS's doctor to first talk about Asperger's with him, he told me that homeschooling is the best thing I could do for my DS. It was really encouraging to me, and I hope it is for you too! :grouphug:

[sbgrace]

Every child really is different. If (when?) you get more information about the particular learning issues he has it might guide you in selecting a program. There are things (like LindaMood Bell) that work on comprehension for instance. I think lack of visualizing while reading and comprehension issues is relatively common on the spectrum. We're targeting visual spatial stuff with my son right now to try to help with math issues. Basically, I'd try to look at the learning issues and make selections related to that on their own in making decisions. Then in areas like autism social issues I selected programs (RDI for us) that addressed those.

[SandiM]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. It is helpful to know it really is just try and see. I have decided to wait for now before buying anything new or even really planning for the upcoming year. I still haven't received the detailed report and I want to see if the upcoming therapy is what works for us.

 

I do plan to slowly start FLL in the fall, continue reading to and with him and work thorugh the Singapore workbook for now.

 

 

sbgrace,

 

May I ask your reasons for choosing RDI? Have you tried ABA or CBT. I only ask because I am new to all this. Thanks.

[sbgrace]

 

 

sbgrace,

 

May I ask your reasons for choosing RDI? Have you tried ABA or CBT. I only ask because I am new to all this. Thanks.

It's just another option--it's developmental rather than behavioral so comes at it from a different point of view and technique set. I decided it was a better fit for the goals I had for my son. It just resonated with me essentially when I was deciding what to do. While not a major factor for us because I would have selected it anyway it was significantly less expensive than a full ABA program. That said, we never tried ABA or Verbal Behavior, CBT, or any behavioral approach. So I can't compare them for you directly.

 

RDI is essentially about changing your lifestyle and approach so you are able to guide the child to make developmental discoveries he missed along the way. So it's a lifestyle approach--cooking together, playing, talking, cleaning, eating--all of it is RDI here. I like that RDI is parent led and doesn't cut into family time like other approaches tend to do. I think naturally typically developing kids are following their parents as guides from very young ages--6 months for sure. Spectrum kids don't usually naturally do that at least in a complete way. But all kids need guides and need to know they can rely on us to interpret the world. RDI was very helpful in helping my child develop feelings of competence in his interactions and ability to handle the unpredictability of people and the world as a whole. A huge theme is helping a child operate in a fluid/dynamic way because in reality the world is indeed unpredictable. Specifically for my son one of the early things he did was learn to handle unpredictable responses in his partner (me mostly at that time). I think that's helped him deal with life in general and especially other kids which are extremely unpredictable! It helped him develop referencing skills (looking to the other person for information/assurance/response/etc.) because he discovered the need for them. It helped him coordinate with others in a more fluid way. So instead of trying to teach him to make eye contact we guided him to discover that referencing the other person visually gives him more information than just listening to words. Very early my son developed a sense of competence in his interactions (that he could handle things) that opened up lots of opportunities for him. Every child is so different in their strong and weak areas. My child's won't match your child's or anyone else's. I like that RDI recognizes that and is tailored to what a child's needs and strengths. But another approach may better fit a particular family. I found this--I can't tell whether the person is doing both ABA and RDI or switched to only RDI or switched back or what but it does do a good job of hitting the initial things you work on in RDI so gives you an idea of the flavor. http://gooagoo.wordpress.com/rdi-un-therapy/ I think (suspect) it lays out the differences between the two better than I could--things like emphasizing nonverbal and declarative communication.

Edited July 25, 2010 by sbgrace

[Greta Lea]

I've heard of RDI, but never, ever, ever read about it. Had NO idea what is was about.

 

The amazing thing is that I've been doing what this women on this blog describes for my 16yo AS son's entire life. I've always said that God continually amazes me at how he leads me to do what I need to do for my son even when I don't know exactly what to pray for.

 

I've always told other AS parents that my son's dr. has told me many times that my son has made such progress (especially compared to his other AS patients) because I look at LIFE as training ground for my ds. It is only in the past 3 years that my has begun to participate in a LOT of social activities without me being his "shadow".

 

Anyway, thanks for that link. Do you have any other links or books to share that might address RDI with *teens*? I'd like to learn about that to make sure I'm doing all the things I can do with my AS teen right now.

[Greta Lea]

SLOOOOOOOOOOW DOWN

For us, this was the most important thing BY FAR. Slow down. Slow down the pace of interaction, the rate of speech, the amount of things you are attempting to accomplish, and the length of time in which you are attempting to accomplish said thing. Become an under acheiver, in this regard.

 

SIMPLIFY

Simplify routines. Cut out all therapies/trips/ outings that don’t feel essential. Simplify the home setting or at least one room or one section of a room so you have a place to play simple games with very little that distracts.

 

Now, I realize this gal was talking about how she's working with her very young child, but I can *still* see with my 16yo ds that these two things are VERY important for him to be able to truly learn and at times simply function.

 

As I'm pulling together curriculum and extra-out-of-the-house activities for his upcoming 10th grade year, I'm thinking I'm making the right decision to still keep things at a slower pace (we call it "his pace") and simplified as much as possible.

[MamaSheep]

I'm happy to share what we've used, but I'm afraid I won't be much help. When ds was little he loved learning. He had horrible tantrums and bizarre behaviors, but hadn't been diagnosed yet, so I felt like I was a thoroughly incompetent parent much of the time. But he LOVED to learn things. He begged to know about math and was fascinated by concepts like negative numbers and infinity. He memorized the names of all the bones in the human skeleton just for fun the year he was four. This was fairly easy for him because he had figured out reading on his own by the time he was three--which is partly why I can't be much help with the reading. My soon to be 8yo daughter, on the other hand, really struggles with reading. I think things are getting better now, though, since we started her on some meds for her ADHD. The All About Spelling program seems to be helping her a lot with that, and I think it's because of the way it uses letter tiles to build the words. With ds--well, he talked early (and incessantly) and was a little information sponge. He didn't just want to know stuff, he DEMANDED to know, and hounded me until he understood. Before he was two he knew the alphabet song and regognized all the refrigerator magnet letters by name. It was a game he'd play everytime I was in the kitchen cooking (because he could not emotionally handle being more than three feet from my leg). By the time he was three he knew all the sounds the letters make (ditto). Before he turned four he got tired of waiting for me to come read the dialog on his favorite Nintendo game (Zelda) so he decided to start reading it himself--and he did. He didn't ever, as far as I remember, go through a phase of slowly and painfully sounding out each word. He just watched me read, figured it out, and one day my husband said to me, "I think he's reading this book." I said, "No, we've just read it so many times that he has it memorized." Dh said, "I don't think so, let me try something." He handed ds a piece of junk mail, and sure enough, ds read it quickly and fluently and then asked a question about what it said that showed he understood everything he had read. I was floored. All of which is of absolutely no help to you, I'm sure. Sorry.

 

I'm glad he learned to read early, though, because he definitely would not have learned it at school, where we sent him for Kindergarten through third grade. It was fairly disasterous (understatement of the year). When we pulled him out at the end of third grade he hated learning. He LOATHED anything that even smelled like "school". He wouldn't read anymore. He wouldn't write. He wouldn't have anything to do with math. The whole first year we homeschooled he would try to run away, hide under the table, stab me with his pencil, and/or rip the math book into shreds every time I got out the math. To say he was resistant doesn't even come close. So overcoming his attitude has been a big challenge. I'm happy to say that here at the beginning of 8th grade he is happy to read again (and does so at an astonishing speed), and will willingly participate in almost all other learning activities that we do at home. Math and writing are still the activities most likely to produce theatrics. Writing is just a problem activity for him, from motor coordination to the way it feels to drag a writing implement over paper.

 

For math we started out using Singapore, and it was a battle every day. I soon learned to give him one page at a time and have a photocopy of it elsewhere as a backup because then when he was too quick for me and ripped up the page I could bring out a copy and start up again where we left off. After a couple of years of Singapore (he made progress, slowly, and started being more cooperative but it was still a battle) he saw me looking at Teaching Textbooks online and got really excited because it was on the computer. I was all for anything that got him excited about math, so I got it for him. It was a couple of grade levels above where he'd been working in Singapore (we started out a good bit behind because of his attitude issues and lack of learning in public school) but he caught on quickly and loved the little electronic study buddy. This past year he got tired of that format and wanted something different. We tried out Life of Fred Fractions, which he enjoyed, but which I think would be too advanced for your son's age. He has been watching his sister use Math U See and asked me if they had a program at his level and if he could try that for a while. I've thought it over and given him placement tests, and I think it will be a good fit so I'll be ordering it on Monday.

 

So that's probably not a lot of help either. Sorry.

 

In general, I find that the best learning materials for him are ones that break skills down step-by-step so we can work on one thing at a time and then put things together, and that organize content so that there is a clear structure and pattern to what we're learning and he can see how things are connected, rather than just giving random information. For example, it works best for us to study different animal groups within the taxonomic structure in order either from least complex to most complex--worms to molluscs to to crustaceans to fish to amphibians to reptiles to birds to mammals, for example (I'm just throwing these out, I don't remember what order they were all in exactly), rather than study mammals this week, the solar system next week, and magnetism the week after that. He has a very structured, orderly way of viewing the world and learns quickly if he can see the patterns and structure, whereas random topics just seem chaotic and therefore pointless to him. And it's really hard to get him to do anything he views as pointless. (I've gotten pretty good at identifying and eliminating busywork--ugh.)

 

Anyway, I hope there's something useful in all that. Good luck, and welcome to the journey!

[chiguirre]

We've been through a lot of different curricula for math and reading and it's really a matter of trial and error. I've also found that something works for a while and then we hit a wall. That said, MUS has lasted a year here and that's a record. I think the reason for this is that it's really a bare bones curriculum, so you can adapt it to your needs easily. I write all the problems on a small white board, so we can spend a long time on a topic or go back if we need to without ds realizing that he's already done a page once. ;):D

This would be harder with a curriculum that has pretty graphics on its worksheets because ds would want to use them. Since MUS is so boring, he prefers the white board and I can go at his pace without demoralizing him.

 

For reading, it was just a long slog. We used ETC, Pathway readers, SL readers, OPGTR, Abecedarian, MCP Phonics, LLATL, and now Rewards Intermediate. Yes, he needed that much practice/reinforcement, but he is almost at the end of the decoding road and we'll switch focus to fluency, comprehension and spelling once Rewards is done next month. For spelling, AAS seems to be the winner because it's also white board/plain paper based so we can move at ds's pace without him knowing that he's slower than average.

 

We're going to start working on writing paragraphs this year. I'm planning on using Oak Meadow 2 with both hsers as well as the CW primers and some Queen Language Lessons for the Very Young. We'll also go through R&S 2 orally. It doesn't seem like an impossible task anymore, so I think we're ready even if it takes a couple of years to get there.

 

Ds attended an ABA-based school for 3 years in preschool and he's been in a wonderful social skills group for 2 years. He's come so far in his ability to blend in in groups of kids. I think our decision to hold him back a year for extracurriculars has reduced his stress level and given him the extra confidence to participate in groups. He's enjoying his outside classes and I've actually gotten comments on his good behavior this year. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

 

It's easy to be overwhelmed sometimes, but try to keep in mind that your ds will grow and develop, even if it's on a different time table. Things that seem impossible now will be more doable in a couple of years. He may always be behind academically, but if he keeps plugging along, he can go a long way to mastering the skills he'll need as an adult. It's just a matter of sticking to a routine and giving him all the practice he needs. There's no point in trying to keep to "grade level" standards if they go too fast. You'll just end up frustrated.

 

ETA: I forgot to mention content subjects. We've covered a lot of history and science topics by read-alouds and videos. Ds has a good memory for things that interest him, and fortunately history and science interest him, so he's learned a lot in those subjects. As a result, he seems a lot more academically on target in group classes than he does when he needs to write or do math problems.

Edited July 25, 2010 by chiguirre

[Guest Nicolas]

Asperger is a lifelong developmental disability that affects social and communication skills. Each person has got different symptoms and behavior. Applying some simple but effective strategies like having the balance between understanding the needs of a child with aspergers and dealing appropriately with situation will make him feel better.

[cjbeach]

Ds has a good memory for things that interest him, and fortunately history and science interest him, so he's learned a lot in those subjects.

 

Of my kiddos it's glaringly obvious that my AS son can turn on/off like a faucet. If a subject interests him he is ON. If he has little or no interest in a subject he is OFF. I know kiddos lack interest in some areas but my AS puts up a wall! We always say "he can do it. If he WANTS to do it. If he doesn't want to....forget about it." My neurotypical dd hates math but even she can't turn OFF learning the way my ds can.

[MamaSheep]

Of my kiddos it's glaringly obvious that my AS son can turn on/off like a faucet. If a subject interests him he is ON. If he has little or no interest in a subject he is OFF. I know kiddos lack interest in some areas but my AS puts up a wall! We always say "he can do it. If he WANTS to do it. If he doesn't want to....forget about it." My neurotypical dd hates math but even she can't turn OFF learning the way my ds can.

 

Hear hear! And we've learned around here that you can beat your fists bloody on that wall, or you can go have cookies and milk together--either way the learning outcome will be pretty much the same, but there's a big difference in the relationship outcome. Sometimes when that wall goes up my motto is, "She who sighs and walks away lives to teach another day". Or alternately, "You can lead a kid to knowledge but you cannot make him think". And, "Sometimes the shortest distance between two points is to jimmy the lock on the back door" (which means I can't get in the "front" way--the "easiest", most logical route, but sometimes I can teach him the same thing at another time in a more roundabout way, and that is "easier" in the long run than trying to do it the more direct and obvious way).

[elise1mds]

Hear hear! And we've learned around here that you can beat your fists bloody on that wall, or you can go have cookies and milk together--either way the learning outcome will be pretty much the same, but there's a big difference in the relationship outcome. Sometimes when that wall goes up my motto is, "She who sighs and walks away lives to teach another day". Or alternately, "You can lead a kid to knowledge but you cannot make him think". And, "Sometimes the shortest distance between two points is to jimmy the lock on the back door" (which means I can't get in the "front" way--the "easiest", most logical route, but sometimes I can teach him the same thing at another time in a more roundabout way, and that is "easier" in the long run than trying to do it the more direct and obvious way).

 

:lol: Noo kidding.

[SandiM]

I think I am feeling a little overwhelmed and it is good to hear that he will grow and mature in time. Most of his bahaviors are very physical which makes being out much harder.

I can relate to the faucet....if there is interest we do much better around here. Everything is interest based including how he treats people which is typical but something I am still adjusting too.

 

Thanks for sharing about the RDI. Reading about your use of it and the links really helped me better understand what it looks like in daily life. The person we have coming is trained in many things..she was recommended by a friend I know who has three girls on the spectrum. She basically tailor makes a program for your kid and their greatest needs and doesn't just stick to strict ABA. We will see how it goes. My need for help mostly lie in helping him due to the physical nature of his responses and outburst.

 

Thanks for all the input. I found very helpful to read all the different experiences here.

[Food4Thought]

Sandi, I just thought of a book recommendation. I don't know why I didn't think of it before - it was my favorite book on homeschooling last year. I found it encouraging to know there were others out there, and that life *would* be different, but that it is possible.

 

Homeschooling the Child with Asperger Syndrome

[SproutMamaK]

Here's a thread that may be helpful to you. It deals with ASD children in general, not specifically Aspie's, but there's some valuable suggestions in here. :D

 

For Math & Reading, MathUSee and All About Spelling seem to be the most recommended (the spelling seems to help the reading come naturally). I'm using them this year, but don't have enough experience with them yet to give my opinion. :D

[SandiM]

Food 4Thought,

 

I wil definately puchase the book you recommended. I am in the newbie category with ASD and can see this book helping.

 

Sproutmama,

 

That thread was very helpful too. The AAS seems recommended across the board. I have decided to only do language, math and some thinking puzzles which he loves and has great success with for this next year. He will tag along with his older sister where he can and just go play cars with his little brother :001_smile:. He is just turning 7 next month. I also have been realizing that the therapy will take a lot out of him. One of his "rules' is not letting anyone but his mom teach him. It creates some serious social and behavior problems...needless to say.

 

Thanks again for all the help. Now on to thinking about my upcoming 5th grader who basically homeschooled herself last year. I struggle to be available to her with my Aspie and a 22 month old baby.

[Night Elf]

My ds14 was diagnosed at age 9. He has never liked manipulatives. He prefers math programs that have lots of pictures, diagrams, and examples. He has always disliked repetitiveness. Even now, he'll get occasional review and as long as he shows he understands the concept, we just move on. On the other hand, he gets frustrated if he can't understand something. He doesn't like to slow down and spend too much time on one thing.

 

I can't help with the reading. I didn't use a reading program with him. His comprehension has always been good as long as he's only asked to repeat things from what he's read. He is not good at answering questions that ask WHY or ask him to PREDICT. It's never been a problem until we started his high school literature class. Ugh!