Self esteem

[kahlanne]

I know self esteem is a touchy subject especially for women but I have a question. Am I the only woman in the world that sees herself as nicer looking than she really is. LOL. Honestly though, I am 6' tall and overweight but I don't really feel bad about myself. Sometimes I have moments but generally speaking I feel great. All of my friends are quite a bit shorter than me, skinny by most standards (100lbs less than me), and workout/diet constantly. Yet, I am the first to put on a swimsuit and jump in the pool at the party. Now it isn't a bikini like I wish I could wear but I still work it. :tongue_smilie: I don't usually stress about each meal that I eat. I have only been on one diet in my life and am thinking about starting one now to loose a few pounds for me but then again, maybe not. I have started working out more because I like doing the kettlebell and don't mind loosing some weight but isn't a must in my book. I see photos of me and am suprised that that is truly what people see since I think I am a good 50lbs lighter. Still I look good for an Amazon. My friends have coined the term "Carol Land" for me. They say I have the best self esteem and always live in Carol Land. There I may not be a toothpick but I am one of the hottest people around. Even if I am not are you really going to argue with a "healthy" 6' tall woman? My children are all right on chart with their weight, not overweight at all, and have great self esteems too. Back in the day, I used to be model thin and always worried that I wasn't small enough, have enough uhmm...in certain areas, etc but over the years somehow I grew to love myself. I am a big beautiful woman. I listen to my friends talk and I feel sorry for them. Not that I think it is wrong to work out or watch what you eat but do it for the right reasons. One friend will only eat a kid's meal at a resteraunt and jogs 3 miles a day. She is tiny!!! She thinks I am unhealthy but I have had 5 kids without issue, my yearly exams are perfect, etc. My doctor said that it even amazes him how healthy I am. Having said that I did have an episode this weekend. I started having major chest pains on Friday and they got worse all weekend. On Sunday the stabbing pain was gone but there was major pressure. I started feeling lightheaded and dh took me to ER. They did an EKG, Xrays, and bloodwork. I was put on oxygen as a precaution. Everything came back perfect. Well, my bloodpressure was up at the beginning but it came back down before discharge. Turns out, excersize can kill you! My doctor said it is definitely muscular and then I started thinking of the kettlebell. I started it a week ago regularly. Seems that when the muscles/cartilage in that area is sore, it can make it difficult to breath, creating more strain, and then lightheadedness. Anyway, I came home with a clean bill of health and a doctor's excuse to not work out. :iagree:I told my skinny friends that I should have never listened to them and should have stayed in Carol Land because I now know excersize can kill. Just kidding, I am going to workout again in moderation but it did make me think. Am I the only woman that doesn't struggle with self esteem issues.

[kahlanne]

Sorry so long but I wanted to add this little tidbit. I have found that now that I am overweight, it works for me. You see when I was skinny and was horrible at sports, people picked on me or ragged me. Now when I play they are just happy that I am trying. I could do the slightest thing and people will cheer cause the fat woman is at least trying. If I stink, they think it is due to my weight not because I actually stink and thanks to being PC, they won't say anything! Yahoo!!! Having said that I also LOVE when this BIG Plus Size Amazon gets out there and actually schools them at basketball. I mean really I got this big old booty and know how to use it to move you out of the way and score! The look on their faces is priceless!!! I don't ever want to loose it all.

[tofuscramble]

I wish I had better self esteem! I am not thin and not fat but I am an actress, I feel great when I know I don't have to go on set or to a party or anything, but the minute I know I have to, I feel huge (it drives my husband bonkers).

 

Honestly I am big compared to most of the women I work with - I've been everything from a 4 to a 10 and they are all 0's, 1's and 2's. Its tough in Hollywood, people define you by your appearance. When I'm just "mum" I feel great but when I'm on set, in an audition or at an event, my weight is constantly on my mind; as is my age.

[JennifersLost]

I'm much heavier than I was a decade ago, and I have way better self-esteem. I think age plays a part.

 

I tell my husband I have "heft" - gravitas, I guess. I'm in my 40s and I have enough experience to know what I'm talking about/doing. I'm not so easily pushed around. When I wear clothes that fit well, I feel great!

 

I only feel bad when I compare myself to my younger (stupider) self. Sure, I'd like to lose a few pounds, but I'm me. Me. That's worth the price of admission to middle age.

[Parrothead]

I wish I had better self esteem! I am not thin and not fat but I am an actress, I feel great when I know I don't have to go on set or to a party or anything, but the minute I know I have to, I feel huge (it drives my husband bonkers).

 

Honestly I am big compared to most of the women I work with - I've been everything from a 4 to a 10 and they are all 0's, 1's and 2's. Its tough in Hollywood, people define you by your appearance. When I'm just "mum" I feel great but when I'm on set, in an audition or at an event, my weight is constantly on my mind; as is my age.

That has got to be tough. :grouphug:

 

Since I'm not an actress I don't mind running 20-40 pounds heavier than what the charts say. I've gotten into my 40s now and really don't care what others think of my body. If I want I can diet, If I don't want, no big.

 

what I look like isn't important. I'm clean, well-groomed and fairly fashionable. Other than that I don't much care.

[Peela]

I cant see how good self esteem is a problem :)

My husband has excessive self esteem and I think it has been good for my kids. My self esteem tends to be lower and is it FAR better now that I am in my 40s, than when I was younger. Especially around my weight. I am not overweight but I am not slim either and I actually feel comfortable in my body, and lately I have stopped weighing myself, and just checked myself out in the mirror regularly, and really, I dont mind what I see at all!

 

My mother is an "Amazon" bodytype (I am not, I took after Dad's side) and always told me she felt much more comfortable carrying some weight. Not as much as she ended up carrying, but still, she told me when she was skinny, she thought she was fat anyway (the photos of her in her early twenties are amazing, she looked like a model!) and she didnt feel good in her body. She foudn it very hard to be a largish woman in a society that reveres asexual, androidal, hipless, anorexic bodytypes. I wish she had your self esteem....but she is honestly one of the best dressed women I know. She looks great, she dresses beautifully and uniquely and with a style I envy!

 

My dd16 has my bodytype and tends to carry just a small amount of body fat...but honestly, I think it looks beautiful. She is by no means overweight, and a layer of fat, and some hips, make a woman look womanly! She is happy with herself, even though her best friend is super skinny.

 

Enjoy youself! It sure beats the alternatives!