S/O of "bus" thread --Do you have a fear that controls you?

[mominbc]

I absolutely love the forest and I have lived in a home with my dream property now for 5 years with a beautiful forest in our back yard. However, I fear going in it because we have cougars and black bears that visit the area regularly. I have such a fear of cougars and bears that I can't enjoy the outdoors and I long too.:sad: Fears stink!!

[Jennifer in MI]

I am also kept awake at night due to memories of a spinal tap that I had as a newborn. I am scared to death of anything touching my spine, and of anyone harming my baby, or my babies being in the hospital.

 

Oh, I do this... if there is danger to be had, I always imagine plunging myself into it. Oh I hate it!

 

Wow! Me too! My first memory is of a spinal tap when I was 2 years old. My mom and dad couldn't be with me and I was held down. It was terrifying. I think it's why I'm a hypochondriac today.

 

And, yes, I also imagine myself in the situations that scare me. Why do I do that????

 

I'm also VERY afraid of deep water. Knowing there are living things under me freak me out. But, I'm learning to face these fears. I swam with the dolphins earlier this year and it was AMAZING. But, I had to have an "escort" with me in the water from the park to do it!! I really wish she hadn't told me that the water was 40 feet deep though!!!

 

I'm also afraid of being in a place that doesn't have medical care nearby. Watching one of my kids or dh die because nobody could get there in time just makes me VERY nervous. I did a LOT of research before we went on our cruise making sure that we could get to land quickly if necessary.

[FriedClams]

Yup! My greatest fear is going to the dentist. I shake and get all clamy when I go to the dentist. I have to deep breath and unclench my hands when I sit in the chair. I love my dentist, he is the nicest guy. If he wasn't so nice I don't think I would go to another one. A few years ago we moved away from here and I didn't see a dentist the whole three years we were gone. My excuse is that I was tortured by dentists as a kid.

 

:iagree:

[Jayne J]

Well, no spider fears, or snakes. Mine is actually way less normal. I am scared spitless (literally) to drive anywhere I've never driven before. Even if I have been there, driven by someone else. Even if it just a straight line with no turns. When I had to drop my husband off at the airport I nearly passed out with panic--I had to drive 2 blocks east then turn onto a road that was somewhat familiar, drive ten minutes in a straight line and then turn onto a non-panic inducing road. It nearly killed me. And I had a Garmin GPS.

 

I am making a concerted effort though to start driving myself--I've lived in the same town all my life and yet the nearest city (very small!) makes me scared. I really feel like my kids will miss out on alot if I don't conquer this--the playhouse, theatre, art museum, etc. all have hs programs and groups, yet I can't make myself drive the city to get them there.:001_unsure:

[Jayne J]

For me, part of my fear absolutely comes from my lack of directional sense. Once, on my way to work (which is a straight line, no turns and about 10 minutes long) I panicked and wondered if I were on the right road. The reason? Someone had painted their house and the route "looked different". But seriously, with a GPS, one would imagine a grown woman could drive to a museum. :glare::001_huh:

[Mommyof4ks]

Flying. My ds wants to go to Hawaii to see a volcano for his Make-a-Wish trip, and though I want to give him anything he wants after all that he has been through the fear of getting on a plane to get there makes me want to change his mind and I feel terrible about that. Thinking about it makes me want to cry, because that is so selfish of me. I flew on a plane 1 time in high school over 15 years ago, and that was enough for me.

[Lovedtodeath]

Wow! Me too! My first memory is of a spinal tap when I was 2 years old. My mom and dad couldn't be with me and I was held down. It was terrifying. I think it's why I'm a hypochondriac today.

 

 

:grouphug: I had severe PPD and therapy nailed it down to the epideral and my son being severely jaundice triggering my memories of my treatment at the hospital. I had a lot of therapy on it, and it did help tremendously. It was severe PPD. I am so glad that I got some help to deal with the memory. Now I just have some PTS from the event, and muscle memory. I know I need to work on it some more. I just wanted to encourage you to work on that memory. My therapist used different types of energy manipulation (like accupressure) while going through visualization. I would still hate my family today if she hadn't helped me.

[Pretty in Pink]

Really?

 

We openly drink in front of our children and we talk to them about moderation, alcohol, drunkenness. I guess we kind of figure the more open dialogue and modeling of appropriate alcohol use will be more effective than treating it as something evil.

 

I wasn't passing judgment on anyone else. In fact, my dh drinks in front of our children and I don't have a problem with it. Other adults drink in front of my children and that is fine. It just isn't something that I am comfortable doing. My parents are both alcoholics, off and on the wagon depending on the day of the week. I have a true, gripping fear of turning out like them.

 

I friend once gifted me a bottle of wine several years ago. It sat on my counter for less than a week before I poured it out. It wasn't even that I was tempted to drink it or anything. I don't know. I just felt like I couldn't risk it.

[Dana]

 

And cockroaches. There are NO paper bags, boxes, or any other extraneous "roach food" products in my house. I've lived though one infestation of those vile, prehistoric creatures and never intend to again. Shiver.

 

 

 

Dh grew up in CA. He hadn't seen roaches the size we get down South until he moved out here with me. We get the 2" ones that come in from outside. Of course it's me who's petrified of them.

 

Had one in the house a couple of weeks ago. I got ds to kill it for me while I cowered in the other room.

 

It's nice that he's old enough to kill the bugs. Last time there was one in the house, we left the house until dh came home. I stayed in the car for about an hour while he searched the house to kill it.

[RoughCollie]

But seriously, with a GPS, one would imagine a grown woman could drive to a museum. :glare::001_huh:

 

Not always. I have zero sense of direction. I thought the GPS would solve the myriad problems that arise in that context. Unfortunately, the GPS said "turn left" and I'd turn right. Thankfully, once I figured out why I was lost, the GPS got me to where I was going.

 

The think left - turn right or hear left - turn right thing is supposedly some kind of learning disability. All I know is I do and say the exact opposite of what I am visualizing when it comes to left and right. I have all sorts of ways I deal with this to make up for it, but I haven't developed them for hearing the directions from the GPS yet.

[asta]

The think left - turn right or hear left - turn right thing is supposedly some kind of learning disability. All I know is I do and say the exact opposite of what I am visualizing when it comes to left and right. I have all sorts of ways I deal with this to make up for it, but I haven't developed them for hearing the directions from the GPS yet.

 

It's a PDD.

 

Try bracelets.

 

Lavender on the left. Red on the right. Or something similar.

 

Someone I know actually has "left" and "right" bracelets.

 

 

a

[RoughCollie]

It's a PDD.

 

I tell my right from my left by where the fork goes in a place setting.

 

When I have to follow directions, I do a rhythm pattern on the steering wheel by squeezing my hands. I can remember the rhythm (as in 2 squeezes left, 1 squeeze right, 1 squeeze left) and where I am in the sequence, for some reason.

 

I have to concentrate to do it when I'm giving directions to someone. I pretend I'm driving and concentrate on the turns - fork side (left) or other side (right).

[Kelli in TN]

I think Elizabeth was just stating her fear, not making a judgment call on drinking or not drinking in front of one's kids. For her, the act is one to be afraid of. Fears are personal. What I am afraid of, you may not be. However, if I knew someone was going to question my fears, I probably wouldn't share them here.

 

Oh, gosh, I'm sorry. I really did not mean to come across as judgemental. I guess if we were conversing together in a room my tone of voice would have been more of a "oh, really, hmmmm, I look at the differently". More of a "that's interesting, I look at that differently".

 

I meant no offense.

[Kelli in TN]

I wasn't passing judgment on anyone else. In fact, my dh drinks in front of our children and I don't have a problem with it. Other adults drink in front of my children and that is fine. It just isn't something that I am comfortable doing. My parents are both alcoholics, off and on the wagon depending on the day of the week. I have a true, gripping fear of turning out like them.

 

I friend once gifted me a bottle of wine several years ago. It sat on my counter for less than a week before I poured it out. It wasn't even that I was tempted to drink it or anything. I don't know. I just felt like I couldn't risk it.

 

I am so sorry. I did not mean to sound defensive. I really meant it in more of "Oh, really? That's interesting...." conversational sort of way. I am very sorry.

[katemary63]

Yes, I am scared to death that my fears will limit my relationships and life experiences. I am not kidding. So...I don't let fear "help" me make a decision. When I am afraid, I acknowledge it, but I make my decisions based on facts or what ever I think the "right" thing to do is. So, this weekend we were supposed to go camping with the horses. The camp is an hour away down a very steep and winding mountain road. I am often nervous just driving it in our car. Our rig is a steel 3 horse trailer and a manual ford pick up. My DH ended up not being able to go. I was SCARED TO DEATH to drive this thing to camp. But..I was NOT going to miss out on our fun time because I was afraid. So, I gathered all the info I needed and consulted with my DH on what to do in an emergency. Then, I said my prayers and headed off. I felt confident in my mind that I COULD do it, but still felt fear in the pit of my stomach the whole way! Check out my blog to see pictures of the fantastic trip we would have missed out on if I had given in to fear!

[HeathenMom]

I tell my right from my left by where the fork goes in a place setting.

 

When I have to follow directions, I do a rhythm pattern on the steering wheel by squeezing my hands. I can remember the rhythm (as in 2 squeezes left, 1 squeeze right, 1 squeeze left) and where I am in the sequence, for some reason.

 

I have to concentrate to do it when I'm giving directions to someone. I pretend I'm driving and concentrate on the turns - fork side (left) or other side (right).

 

i have to think of my earlobes to tell my right from left...bizarre, i know but it's the only thing that works for me. i've always blamed it on being ambidextrous.

 

by the way, i'm scared of

-doctors

-mechanics

-driving at night