Plucky
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Posts posted by Plucky
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More support, than anything. DH works from home when I'm away, so they are never alone, but there is no way DH could do with them what I've done with them (he couldn't handle implementing K12 with the 3 oldest a few years back, and I thought that was super simple!).
I'm just dealing with feelings of guilt...torn between my "ideal" and "what is realistic." Even if I didn't have this job, I don't think I could handle everything "in my ideal, perfect scenario" for 5 children who vary so much (in interest, drive, ability...). I've read the good, bad and ugly about authors, curriculum, etc. And even though no one has "said" anything, it's like this sort of "black cloud" of disapproval for some of these choices is hanging over me.
You know that feeling when you know you're making the best choices you can given your circumstances, but still hear the very vocal disapproval from others in your head... I just want it to go away. My parents look at the cost of homeschooling and don't get why dh and I are spending this much (vs. something like CLASS), but the problem with something like CLASS is that my kids are all over the map. 2 grades ahead here, average there, 3 grades ahead in yet another area...and if i was going to give my kids just "average" work, why am I bothering to homeschool them at all?
The pressure is mostly real and perceived that I put on myself...and at times it just gets to be too much.
You are right, even if you were home full-time you wouldn't be perfect and neither would your curriculum choices. You are back to work recently for financial reasons aren't you?
I cannot imagine how you must be feeling. What options do you have? Do you have any charter schools or parent/public school partnership programs? Any co-ops that don't require your involvement?
One of my son's friends was hsed all the way through until 16 when he went to community college. Both his parents have high-powered careers running their own businesses - multiple businesses. His mom admitted that she didn't feel they were doing everything they could or should. They supplemented with outside classes and both her kids got there AA by 18.
I like to do a pro/con list and look at my options. I continue hsing when it seems like the best option. I have one in private school for one more year and then off to CC, one going away to uni in a couple weeks, and two that I homeschool part-time right now and they also attend a parent-partnership that they love. It's very different than what I thought we'd be doing right now but it is right for us.
Anyway, I just wanted to encourage you. It is hard work this parenting gig and we can only do our best. :grouphug:
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I also wanted to add we won't be able to afford college and our boys have flat feet. That eliminates the military. My oldest wants to be a beat cop so he can "kick the crap out of bad guys." Our 9yo ds, thinks-with-stomach, wants to be a chocolatier so we may have to find an apprenticeship or money for the Culinary Institute of America.
Flat feet isn't a hindrance most of the time. I am flat footed and I served.
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Yes, it's math with my middle ds. But it's not a struggle for me to teach. He just needs a bit more to get it than my oldest did at that age.
It's good to see that my house is not the only house in which writing instruction turns hair grey.
It does help doesn't it? I know when I first started hsing I only saw and read about perfect days. Well, they aren't all perfect. :D
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My kids couldn't take the isolation, but I might for that price. Great place to retire.
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ETA: And we've told dd18 as much. She seems to think that being 18 gives her license to do whatever she wants, regardless of how it affects the people she lives with. We have told her that if she chooses to live here rent-free, she is a dependent, and the "my house, my rules" idea is in effect. If she chooses to pay 1/5th of the living expenses, she is then a tenant and can do pretty much as she pleases. I'm not saying you have to do this with your child; I'm just letting you know that I'm not saying one thing and doing another in my own family.
Tara
The newly 18 is another fun age. My 18ds has always been very responsible and we treated him as a young adult from the age of 16. Suddenly at 18 he was saying things like, "It's mine. I should have it." and other gibberish. I told him that we'd give him his stuff and he could give us all our stuff back and that included his room and car. He looked a bit startled but got the point.
It takes a while for them to figure out that a real adult supports themselves. Turning 18 is not enough. You can't proclaim you are an adult to your parents and ask them to pay for everything. Poor kid, reality can be unpleasant. :lol:
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Thank you so much for posting that, as it gives me hope. :001_smile:
I see glimmers that my son will someday be a decent writer, but the day-to-day process has been awful. I don't want DS to hate writing, so am trying to be gentle. We are making slow but steady progress.
That is the way my oldest reacted. I had to back off and give him some time. I still had him produce writing but not necessarily in a regimented way where I dissected it.
It sounds like you know your boy. :D
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Sometimes words aren't the answer.
Sometimes, a long, firm hug, and a quiet moment, can go a very long way.
It says -
I see you are upset.
I know I can't fix it.
But I do care about you.
I will be there with you along the way.
I love you.
I accept you just the way you are.
You're not perfect, and that's OK.
I love you.
Sometimes, that's really all you've got.
Sometimes, it's really all you need.
Very true.
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It depends on the kid. Here I would say math for my younger 3. There are sometimes emotional breakdowns over it. My oldest is more math oriented and for him I would say Biology was hard, Chemistry was a breeze for him.
If you are teaching writing don't sweat it so much. We were much more relaxed about writing until 8th grade and then we got serious and it seemed to click so easily and quickly. I'm more inclined to worry about having a child hate writing from too much focus on it too early. My older two are excellent writers and my younger two are showing promise as well. Just a thought.
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Oh, you have one of those intense kids. I say a few mild swear words when something spills or I stub my toes. My kids hate it. I grew up with parents that routinely dropped the F-bomb and more so while I don't like swearing it seems to be ingrained in me somehow over too much exposure. :)
My youngest gets upset when I say bladder, breast, penis and more. Sigh. She's my intense, sensitive one. All I can do is talk and listen and try to explain to her how to act more appropriately. She used to have a lot of meltdowns when she was younger. She cried when we would get rid of old broken appliances. Sigh.
I think they do outgrow it, but they are the kids you really have to watch for as they are more prone to depression and anxiety. Don't hesitate to talk to your dr or a counselor. Some kids are just more challenging.
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I would, but unfortunately my dd's private school can be a bit more intense academically and one never knows when that will happen. When I was just homeschooling 3 and one was in ps part-time we picked up for a week when my grandma was dying and then died. The teacher was very understanding, of course my son was a model student so that helps.
Remember though I'm also the horrible mom that let my dd skip a couple periods and study for a big test from her inconsistent/psycho teacher. We tried everything to not have the teacher again this year but failed. I guess it's another one of life's fun lessons.
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14 is a hard age. I sent my dd to private school for 9th and she will go again for 10th. She loves it and she appreciates me so much more. We are very close now and before we were butting heads. So if you have a good, safe school it might be an option. I don't know that I'd send one to middle school. I strongly dislike middle school for kids.
Either way, know you are not alone. :)
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True, PS teachers have been known to say that. Doesn't mean it has never been correct.
I know a lot of homeschooled teens and most are not socially awkward. My ds even says he met a lot more awkward kids in his ps classes.
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Ok I am in the NW. Seattle area. I *have* lived in a middle of nowhere place around here a few hours away that then built up more......pm me if you don't want to say where. Maybe I can give you some ideas.
Honestly I think financial hardship is of the worse kind. If you have a solid family and go in to this thinking something great is going to come of it I think it's a good idea. Just keep your head up, and if you do it don't think of what you don't have. And there is always Amazon :D
I agree. As long as everyone is healthy and happy then I'd move to where we wouldn't struggle as much financially. I've been poor and it is stressful.
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We can all second guess ourselves and often do, but if she is doing well right now be happy! She's a teenager and so you will have more bumps in the road before raising her is over. She's still a work in process, heck we all are. :)
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There are online options, but he hasn't done well historically in online classes. The other Christian colleges are just as expensive. There is one other college that some people use in our area, but it is not accredited. I don't want him to go this route.
Does he have a plan to pay off the loans? Is he willing to live at home for a couple years after graduation and pay everything off? That could work.
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Living at home, it is just 20 minutes away. His job, church, us and his 2 bffs are all in a 5 mile area. He will need the car. It would be another $7200 for him to live on campus. :svengo:
Does he have any other educational options to earn his pastoral studies degree?
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The plan is for him to pay it ,but we will help as we can. If we can pay it, that would be great, but we don't want him to expect it. He is very good at saving money, but he has never had to make payments before. You know, the little things like remembering to make the payment and having the funds available. LOL Even if we do help out, we will put the money into an account and let him be responsible to pay it.
:svengo: He is a bit of a procrastinator, so I want to get him used to payments, while I'm still available to 'supervise' it. LOL
We aren't going to delay a year, because he is qualifying for a Pell grant/college financial need grants due to our low income last year. Once our income heads back up, he won't have that help any more. If he waits a year, it will cost him $8000 in aid.
Does he have any church backing? He can intern or work part-time for them and often members will donate money towards a future pastor's education.
Is he going to live at home or will there be room and board costs? I just don't see this working out as laid out here. I'm sorry.
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Doesn't that pose a risk to the mattress or something? I would think a musky/moldy smell eventually.
I haven't done it but I think if you have a mattress protector on over your bottom sheet you should be fine.
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Hormones? I wouldn't want to be that age again for anything. :)
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Nevermind. I am waiting for a call back from the dr.
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My dh does trim or shave. He lifts weights and has very little body hair so the little he has bugs him when he sweats. I do not require it. I only ask that there is no tickly stubble.
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I'd prefer an OB I wasn't attracted to. Just sayin'.
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Really, in these threads? I think if you are leaning one way, then you should say so up front.
I think you need some cupcake vodka. If I find some I will send some your way. :D
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Just piping in to say that I think it is very thoughtful of you to consider the siblings feelings like that. I remember when my brother went off to college' date=' I was so sad. I couldn't get over the fact that my parents just left him there. Seems silly now, but it really upset me at the time.
Maybe if college kid doesn't want the youngers to come along, you could take your camera and take pictures. Big brother at the library, big brother at his desk, big brother with his roommate, big brother on his bed. Of course if big brother hates pictures this may be more intrusive.
Hope he has a great year :auto:.[/quote']
That is a good idea. Lots of pictures. He will be home monthly thank goodness. While this is about him we all love him and it will leave a hole in our lives a bit. Change is hard. :001_smile:
How do I make her stop picking?!?
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
Yep, it is a form of OCD. I'd take her to her pediatrician and talk about it. She truly cannot stop.