Do you think there is a possibility that your dd just isn't an auditory learner? My dd, 9, is an aspie. She also has hearing loss, but hears functionally at a very mild hearing loss level (she wears cochlear implants). She can hear what we say, however, she misses it a lot...not because of her hearing loss, but because she's checked out. She is so focused in on whatever it is she is thinking about/seeing/reading, etc. that she doesn't hear anything we say to her. We do read alouds with her but she couldn't care less. She doesn't want to sit there and listen to us read. She wants to read the book herself. She is a VERY visual learner and she loves to read. She is also obsessed with animals and pretends to be one, often. She crawls around growling at her siblings (which they aren't fond of unless they are playing the game too). She gets so immersed that sometimes she jumps on them and "claws" them (not hard, but it still hurts). Thank God, she's never bitten or anything. She definitely relates to animals much more than other people. As for the shyness, my dd isn't shy. She's the opposite and has no friends because she's so "in your face" and has no boundaries. Unfortunately, she scares kids away. :( I have no idea how you could go about teaching your dd to read. I wish I could help you. DD kind of taught herself to read, I think.

Completely agree with this. I've always said it's like my daughter has to be on the right channel. If she's not, she's not getting anything. Some days, she's tuned in just fine and others she doesn't pick anything up. I have no idea how to help her find that right channel.

I've gotten mixed reviews on this. I'm wondering if I should do spelling w/my first grader. We already using ETC (moved back to 2 because I wasn't sure she was REALLY absorbing everything in ETC3, though she was getting all the right answers). I have people telling me that it's not that important and others who swear by it. DD gets very upset when she gets something wrong. She sometimes even melts down. DD1 is using Sequential Spelling and I tried to see if DD2 could do it, but it was WAY over her head. I've heard good things about AAS, but other than that would have no idea where to go.

My dd is 9, 3rd grade. We are currently using Sonlight b+c core for history & bible-she pretty much reads them herself because she loves to read WWE2-but she probably could do 3. We just started really working on grammar this year and I wanted to make sure she didn't miss anything. Apologia science-again, heavy on the reading, which she loves We are getting ready to start: FLL3 & CLE 2 math We used Righstart B last year and I don't really have any idea how much she picked up. She struggles in math and is still having a hard time remembering her math facts. She understands the concepts, but can't process fast. Needless to say, she kind of dislikes math.

Unfortunately, that is a normal cost. Dealing with appts/evals for this type of stuff isn't cheap. We paid about $1500 to get our dd evaluated for autism...and that was only for the eval. We can't afford to do any therapy now because our insurance won't pay for it. It's very frustrating. I hope your niece can get the help she needs.

How did you help him with his random capitalization? DD, who is 9, and very likely dysgraphic, does this ALL the time. I hate constantly telling her "Oops, you forgot to a capital" or "You have a random capital letter there." It seems to happen with certain letters more often (like L, probably because it's more defined as a capital letter.)

I agree with critterfixer. My aspie dd is only 9, but we have these issues. I try to tell her life could be so much easier if she would think through things. I think some of it is the impulsivity aspect of it. Whatever is in front of them is just what they do. Lists help her a lot. I have to detail how to do things every time I'm having her clean something, take a shower, whatever. I'm hoping someday, she'll catch on and not need the detailed explanation. If she sees something written down, she is much more likely to remember it. That's just a part of who she is. She has a memory like a trap when it comes to written words. Also, another thing I try to remember is teaching her the correct way to do things the first time. If she does something wrong the first time she does it, chances are it's going to be MUCH harder to fix. If we are doing a complex task, I make sure to go through each step and, again, write it down. I agree, though. It is very frustrating that these things just don't come naturally. I hate that she has to work so much harder than everyone else. Then everyone else is frustrated because she is holding them back or they think she's not doing her share because she only brought in one piece of trash. We have a rule that the kids have to bring stuff in from the van when they come in the house. My 6 year old will pick up as much as she can. The 9 yr old will just pick up one thing and think that's okay. I've told her over and over and over to bring in as much as she can so the van is clean and she can bring out something else next time we drive somewhere. Nope...still just brings in one thing. Wish I could help you. Other than writing things down and lists, I have no other suggestions. But, I do feel your pain.

I agree. I've pretty much disregarded his advice because I know my kid better than he does (despite the myriad of tests he did). My biggest concern with meds is that I'm afraid they won't really help her. I am not convinced she has adhd, but I am convinced she has the symptoms of it. Add that to the fact that she is tiny (less than 45lbs and is 9 years old). I don't want to risk her eating even less than she already does. I would be willing to do it if I was sure it would help and not hinder her other wonderful qualities. But she is so impulsive and "scary" to other kids (and therefore has no friends). She just too quick and in your face. No boundaries kinda girl. Maybe I should talk to dh...I just wish he could understand how hard it is to teach her. Then again, he is just like her in some ways, so he gets her much more than I do. Anyway...not trying to hijack here. I just appreciate all the viewpoints and info on what works for who.

I'm not much help for you, but I can completely relate. My oldest is 9 and has asperger's. She also seems to have adhd symptoms. She takes at least twice as long to school as my 6 year old. Meanwhile, the 2 & 3 year old get hardly any of mommy's time....which just feels so wrong. :(

Good thread to read. My 9 yr old dd has asperger's and has a lot of adhd symptoms. It feels like school takes so long for her and she gets so frustrated. We've been against medication for a long time, but there are days when I just wish there was something we could do to help her focus. DH doesn't get it because he doesn't have to teach her things that she doesn't enjoy. He has lots of fun teaching her, but it's all things that she loves (which she can hyperfocus on, of course). Our ped said if we ever wanted, we could try it out, but with AS, sometimes things don't work as well. Our psychologist who deals with AS told me flat out she couldn't have add or adhd because she was capable of focusing on reading (she is hyperlexic). The ped said she would put her on clonodine since she has so much trouble sleeping already. I'm almost at the point where I want to try something because we spend our whole day just trying to get her to focus. It's hard when you've got 3 younger kids to tend to who are all doing what they are supposed to. They get left with no time with mommy because I have to spend so much time with the oldest just trying to get her to focus. Meanwhile, my 6 yr old has long since finished all her work and is vegging in front of the tv (which is not at all what I envisioned for my family). So, thanks to everyone for sharing. This may come in useful in the coming months...if I can convince dh it just may be necessary.

We have the same problem with our 9 year old dd who has asperger's (and I suspect some form of dyslexia). She is a phenomenal reader, but can't sound out words. It's like she just memorizes the patterns to the letters and figures it out. There are many words she understands the concepts to, but has no idea how to pronounce them. She also struggles in math, but it's not the conceptual knowledge. It just the computation. It takes her a long time and she tends to get bogged down. She reverses things all the time. We just got past called 12, twenty one and so on. It still happens occasionally. We are just starting with CLE 2 (well, hopefully in the next week). I've seen a lot of good things about it here on WTM, so I'm really hoping it works for her. I hope you find the right program for your dd...it's so tough finding the right program. Everything else is fine, but math is killer here. She hates it because it's so tedious for her. It's like she has to think through each problem. I have no idea whether it's a dyslexia problem or just a processing issue.

Ahhh...sounds like many of us have been there. My 9 yr old dd does this too. My 6 yr old might not be a fan of something, but she sits down and does it. The 9 yr old will try to weasel her way out of it. And then we end up working into the evening while her siblings play. She doesn't really care. I try to tell her that it would just be easier if she would just get it done, but she just won't do it. We are getting ready to start up Accountable Kids. It's a responsibility program and it has cards for homeschooling subjects. I'm hoping it will help. She did really well with it a few years ago before we were homeschooling.

We have been using Sonlight with dd#1 because she loves to read. It suits her well, but now that dd#2 is added to the mix, it's tougher. We have cored B+C (I think, used to be 1+2). It's way over dd#2's head. I've moved away from using their LA because it's just too hard for both dd's and they hated it. We're currently using WWE and am going to start FLL's soon. So, I'm looking at SOTW. I've got gotten WTM and am planning to read it, so the classical method is still new to me. I'm hoping that SOTW is more hands on. I know that's what dd#2 needs. She loves the hands on stuff. She is really not enjoying the history aspect of it right now. She will sit and listen, but it's all way over her head. I'd also like do incorporate DD#3 into some of the hands on stuff. So, tell me about SOTW. DD#1 is content to just read the stuff from Sonlight, but I need something more "involved" for dd#2. Sara 9yr old dd, Asperger's, bilateral cochlear implants using Sonlight B+C, WWE2, FLL, starting CLE soon, HWT2 and reviewing ETC 6yr old dd, Sonlight B+C core, WWE1, FLL, Singapore, HWT1, and ETC 3yr old dd, easy workbooks just because she loves them 2yr old ds, learning through osmosis

So many good things about CLE. We are in a similar situation. We were using RightStart B with my dd who is in 3rd grade. She was almost through with it, but I felt like she didn't get anything out of it. Technically that's a first grade curriculum (but it was tough!). I just bought the first 5 light units of CLE 2 for her. I'm excited to get them and see how she does. She is one of those kids who gets it when it's relevant. Word problems aren't a huge challenge for her, but the "abstract" numbers problems are harder. Rightstart was way too oral for her. She needs to see everything. I hope you can find something that works. Just letting you know we are in the same boat.

Thank you SO much! We are doing Apologia with my 1st & 3rd grader and it's a bit much for the first grader. Going to look into these supplements to help us out.

DD will be 9 next week and we are really struggling with math. We were using RightStart B (which is supposed to be first grade level), but she just can't do it. Too much oral exercises. I should say she is also deaf with cochlear implants (her functional hearing is quite good, especially 1 on 1) and has a diagnosis of asperger's syndrome. She just doesn't seem to get math at all. She gets a lot of the concepts, but the computation part really gets her. She's very slow and has lots of focus issues when it comes to math (some add symptoms which is common w/aspies). So, I'm looking at some various curriculums and wanted to see if anyone could chime in. Teaching Textbooks 3-computer based would be good for her. We went through the placement test and she passed that. Seems more of a 2nd grade, which is fine for her....probably necessary really. It's expensive though. MUS-we looked into last year and chose RightStart over it. Seems to be highly visual, which would be good for her. Life of Fred-She loves to read and does wonderfully with word problems. They make more sense to her than numbers on a page. However, it looks like the "real" stuff starts w/fractions. I could get the 1/2 grade books and just do them as a supplement/review. I do have a 6 year old and an almost 4 year old as well. Any other suggestions? We really need something that is highly visual. She would do wonderfully with a curriculum that she reads and then does. She LOVES to read. If she reads it, she knows it. Thanks! Sara, mama to Goose (9), Bug(6), Boo(3), & Bud(2)