My youngest is 8 years old and has significant anxiety issues related to trauma. She is in weekly therapy and sees a psychiatrist monthly. In the past week, she has wet the bed, twice. Prior to those times, she had quit wetting the bed for the past couple of years. This wouldn't be a big deal except she's terrified at night and has been sleeping with us for the past five months. She takes medication (klonopin and celexa; but we are weaning her off klonopin so she is at half doses at the moment) so I don't think it's a medication issue. The only thing I can think of is that we recently saw a gastroenterologist as she has fecal incontinence. (We need to rule out medical reasons, we suspect it's anxiety related). I'm wondering if we put so much focus on that part of her body that she's now having urine incontinence as well? Any other reasons that I'm overlooking where a child might start wetting the bed suddenly? I'm not mad, but DH is not at his best in the morning, especially when awakened in this way. He went for a walk and she's in her room refusing to get out of bed she's so embarrassed. Easter morning is NOT off to a good start. :( I'm hesitant to put her in pull-ups at night at this point because we're already dealing with a shame issue and this isn't helping.

She'll be wearing a shrug over it (and shorts underneath the skirt since she occasionally sits with her knees to her chest). The church would never make anyone feel uncomfortable, but I would feel uncomfortable if we didn't blend in. Thanks again :)

I'm always awkward when meeting new people (and new is defined as someone I don't know well - I can meet the same person more than once and they are still 'new'). Put him to work. It will be good for your dd and the young man to do chores together if they are planning on a serious relationship. Ask them to do the dishes, or clean/vacuum one of the rooms. If he's planning on living with you for a summer, I would start having him help out or you will feel resentful if he doesn't do anything later on. Truly, I don't move from the sofa when I'm at someone's house because I'm not very graceful at first. I've always appreciated the hosts who helped me over my shyness (even though people wouldn't picture me as shy).

Thanks everyone! I appreciate the reassurance. :)

My oldest is very hard to shop for due to her autism. I have to guess at sizes (she has gained 20 lbs in the past year, but is not overweight - just a teen). Fabric has to be right, comfort is a must and cannot be tight. Plus, it needs to be long so I can put leggings underneath (she puts her legs up to her chin at times). My church is Presbyterian and they are fairly conservative. We have only been attending a couple of months and I haven't anyone I can ask this close to Sunday. Most dresses I saw while shopping were either short, sequined, strapless, backless or didn't meet my other requirements. I found a nice black dress with large orange/pink flowers on it. It had an orange flower on the belt. Okay, found the picture of it http://www.jcpenney.com/dotcom/kids/girls/shop-all-girls/fair-square-prices/sale/emily-west-sleeveless-floral-cotton-poplin-dress---girls-7-16-and-plus/prod.jump?ppId=pp5002351209&catId=cat1001440004&deptId=dept20000016&N=4294966491&topDim=Product+Type&topDimvalue=dresses&dimCombo=Product+Type%7C&dimComboVal=dresses%7C&currentDim=Product+Type&currentDimVal=dresses Is this appropriate for Easter Sunday? Otherwise, I have a beige/blue dress, but it's not as pretty.

This might be it - synesthesia. Read and see if it is a bit similar. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synesthesia

I have heard of it, but can't recall the name. Does she associate the letters of the alphabet or numbers with different colors?

My middle daughter has awful dental issues. She has had major crowding and impacted teeth. If memory is correct, she has had a total of 12 teeth pulled over the past several years. Today, our dentist pointed out that her molars (I think that's what they are - the next to last tooth in her mouth) on both sides haven't completely come in (these are her baby molars, not permanent). Upon looking at them, I could see that they barely are past the gum surface. The dentist stated that we should have our orthodontist look at them but if she needed them out, we would need an oral surgeon to do the procedure. She said they were too tightly wedged into her mouth. (She took x-rays before speaking with me). Is this unusual for her age? (She is 11 1/2). I'm dreading another procedure for her. Plus, my oldest is having surgery for impacted canines next Monday.

We have seven medical appointments scheduled for this week and oral surgery for my oldest next Monday. Busy, busy, busy!

Thanks for all the suggestions. I will be looking into all of them (I have new tabs stretched out across the top of my screen!). She really likes Khan Academy and I'm glad to see that it will line up with Singapore at some point. Perhaps it will make Singapore click for her. We haven't tried Singapore in a couple of months as she was really struggling. When she left PS in 1st grade, she had a solid 100 in math and it was her favorite subject. I really want to bring her back to that point and I feel confident that she's capable of doing so. Technology wise, we are a very tech household. (My husband is a computer geek and frequently receives old laptops in lieu of payment for repair of other computers. He fixes them up for the girls). The girls each have a 'fun' laptop for games and a really good laptop for academics only. We also have an IPAD and kindle fires. I'm open to any app suggestions. At the moment, she needs to be able to 'speed' simple addition and subtraction (without using her fingers). It would be helpful to put her on something for 10 minutes a day just to increase her memorization in that area. She's slowly in double digit addition with occasional carrying right at this moment. I'm hoping that it sticks and it doesn't go away. I think telling time is going to stick. She can do place value and greater/less than. Her tutor today said that she could tell a definite difference in the past week alone. (The tutor is aware of her situation and knows that she tends to zone out at times). My biggest squirm factor is that I accidentally let it slip to my sister that my daughter has a math tutor and I could tell she was appalled that a child so young needed a tutor. My mother knows she has a tutor and also is disturbed about it. Neither of them know about her circumstances so I'm left with subtle digs about my teaching ability (which I already worry about some days). Thanks for all the suggestions and I'm open to more if you have them. :)

I wanted to mention something that DOES make us feel welcome at church - we do a themed potluck every Wednesday. I receive a list of what the themes will be for the month (spaghetti, soup, vegetables, etc). This way, I can make dd's meal look similar to the others. They also have given her the run of the kitchen and she is able to keep her food in the refrigerator (labeled with her name, nobody bothers it) and use the microwave to heat it herself. As a general rule, she won't eat food - not even fruit - at a potluck as she worries about the preparation and handling. She is very reactive to the smallest amounts and becomes very ill, very quickly. If it's sealed, in a package, with ingredients clearly listed, she will consider it, but only if she is the one to open the package and pull her portion out of the bag. If an adult does it, she very politely asks them to wash their hands first. Our church has offered to do what they can to make us comfortable, but we're most comfortable providing our own food.

It's not considered cheap. I worked in a restaurant for many, many years when I was younger. Lots of people ask the same thing. Many times, when packaging up leftovers we put one in there anyway.

We wouldn't let dd eat anything the church provides. It's not just the grown ups, what if little kids use the same spoon for two different things? Your heart is in the right place, but I worry things will go wrong.

Our youngest daughter will be tested for dysgraphia in the next couple of months (waiting on an appointment time). Currently, her handwriting is messy, but legible. Her oddest habits are forming letters from the bottom to top - right to left, her spacing is poor, she puts letters that should go below the line, like g's and j's and p's into the line, not below. She also randomly throws capital letters into the middle of words like waTer or riveR. She was in public school for kindergarten and half of first grade with the same problems. Her OT said this was still normal for her age and she was unable to correct the way she formed letters. We have worked through letter forming books continuously. She can write sentences and paragraphs, but her writing problems stay the same throughout her writing. She is 8 years old and midway through 2nd grade (she did have regression issues earlier this year and went back to reversing letters, but that seems to have straightened out). Is this still typical for her age or am I right in seeking an evaluation?

My youngest daughter has had a difficult year. She is currently in therapy for trauma and sees her therapist one day a week (which becomes a total wash for schoolwork afterwards) and her psychiatrist one day a month (again, she's too emotionally spent afterwards for schoolwork). We do some school work on the week-ends to help her attendance. She is in 2nd grade and was doing well with Math U See (we had ordered Singapore but she didn't like it so we were using it as a supplement) until November when therapy started. Without going into details, she literally couldn't do school work for part of November, most of December and January. February started back up and her academics were at the level of mid-Kindergarten (regression back to time of trauma). She could not get past single digit addition no matter how hard I tried. I finally hired a tutor (PS teacher) and we made very slow forward progress. A few days ago, I decided to try Khan Academy. For some reason (thankfully), it clicked. She became motivated for all the badges and avatars. She's finally made it through single digit addition and is now onto double digit with some carrying. She learned how to tell time (completely, without even the numbers to help). She has spent nearly two hours a day working on math. I am so relieved that this seems to be helping. The sight of MUS or Singapore books make her wilt and I thought maybe I should try a new program. Unless she catches up completely in math (which might be possible now), she will be working through the summer (light schedule). I'm not overly familiar with Khan but it doesn't look like a stand alone and I can't really tell where grade levels begin/end, it's just a continuous stream of math (and other things, but math is our biggest concern). Any suggestions on how to utilize Khan Academy with a smaller 'spine'? Most of her problems are emotionally based although dysgraphia is a possibility (she will be tested for that soon).

Our school board has a program for literacy education for adults. I also know that some libraries are a meeting place for adult literacy. You didn't mention if there was a learning disability or not, but I feel certain there are resources out there to help out.

My youngest started therapy a month before she turned 8 years old. The first time, I went in there with her for the first part of the session because she was scared to be alone. (I had previously met the therapist and gone over my list of concerns). The therapist now sees her mostly alone other than the last few minutes when I go in and she discusses some of their session. She also emails me and contacts me by phone if I have urgent situations. I look at it this way. If my daughter is upset and doesn't want to tell me something (or have me know about it) and would rather tell someone who is a stranger - in the long run, that benefits my daughter and that's what I want. Also, it's better to start therapy now than wait if there's a problem that needs to be addressed. I think there are too many parents who are afraid of the stigma. You're doing just fine. :)

Microwave a regular potato, skin it - mash with a touch of butter and milk/cream (our daughter needs to gain weight), a small bit of salt. I usually add more milk/cream and make it into a small version of potato soup. I add a bit of chicken broth for flavor and sometimes melt cheese in it. I make 'dessert' with mashed sweet potato and some type of sweetener.

I use flour sack towels and kitchen towels for the kitchen. We go through quite a bit as we cook a lot. They are changed out throughout the day. Nothing is used for more than a day. Cloth napkins for eating - one meal usage but occasionally, if we ate something simple and not messy, we will re-use our own napkin. At the end of the day, after the kitchen is cleaned, all towels are piled up and thrown in a plastic laundry hamper - wet, dry, whatever. Bath towels look different (different color) than kitchen towels. We reuse washcloths in the tub frequently as four of us share the tub (my husband showers). Every few days, we grab all the towels out of the bathroom and throw them in the same plastic laundry hamper. I have one daughter (my oldest) with special skin requirements and we use white washcloths for her use only (or if one of the girls needs one for a specific pre-approved purpose). Those are never re-used, but go immediately into the plastic laundry hamper. If chemicals (other than soap) have been on the towel, I hang it over the hamper to dry. I do a load of towels about every other day and wash all the towels together. If I have to clean something really nasty, I either use paper towels or simply throw the cloth towel away. We've dealt with significant nastiness and I'd rather buy more towels (and sometimes sheets) than go to the trouble to clean and wash the mess.

Thanks or the replies. The nurse referred us to the ER last night and we were there from midnight (it takes an hour to drive there) until 7 am when they admitted her. We were discharged about two hours ago. I asked for a mono test and I thought she was getting one, but for some reason they didn't do one and had decided that it couldn't be mono. The belief is that she injured her legs playing soccer and the headaches were from an increase in medication she is taking (we increased it on Tuesday). We are cutting back on the medication and waiting out the leg pain. They said it will either get significantly better or significantly worse. Since I have slept only three hours total, I am off to bed. Thanks for the wishes and prayers. We go see our regular doctor for a follow up tomorrow.

lol, he does have a crush on her. Actually, I was worried that if it is mono she might have ruptured her spleen. We'll see what the nurse says. I called the after hours nurse and am waiting to hear back.

Although mono wouldn't ordinarily bother me, she started soccer two days ago and was tackled by one of the guys (co-ed group - the younger boys typically are a bit more exuberant in playing). The severe leg pain, dizziness and stomach pain started after that.

Actually, she does have a sore throat as well.

First, I know that when in doubt, check it out. I'll probably call the after-hours number in an hour or so if the symptoms persist. But, I'm hoping that something will ring a bell with someone here and they may have suggestions. My daughter has been lethargic a lot lately (few months) which we attributed to medication and stress (she sees a therapist). Today seems unusually worse. We went to bed at a decent time (8:30) and she was asleep by 9:00. She woke up at 10:00 this morning (slightly more than usual) with a low fever 99.7. She said her legs were hurting (she had her first soccer practice Thursday night - but she's very active anyway). She ate some toast for breakfast, but didn't eat all of it. After eating some soup around noon, she said she didn't feel well and went to lay down with a headache and legs hurting. She fell asleep around 2 and slept until 6. I had a hard time waking her and she mostly mumbled. She finally woke up and sat down to eat dinner. She said it hurt to stick her tongue out and would only eat rice. (She's been drinking plenty of water). She wanted to sit on the couch but a few minutes later I found her crying on the floor. She said her legs hurt so bad they wouldn't hold her up anymore. They hurt in the crease where her hip connects to her body. I helped her back on the couch and asked her to try to stand. She fell again (I caught her). I think she may be exaggerating that part a little. Most of the time she looks miserable, but occasionally laughs and chatters for a bit. She has a bit of a stomach ache, but no nausea, coughing, vomiting, sniffing, sneezing or fever above the 99 range. Any suggestions? And again, if she's not well in a couple of hours, I'm calling the after hours nurse, but I'm hoping someone here will have a thought of what it might be.

I would suggest keeping in contact with all of the grandchildren and doing your best not to engage in discussion about the step-son when you visit. Birthdays and Christmas, and any other holidays would be lovely. Also consideration when it comes to school shopping and purchasing school supplies. I agree with others that you may be a very stable influence (in some cases the only stability) these kids will have.