Help gifted with ADHD

[visitor]

Dear all, the doctor said that my DS almost 6 years old. Probably has ADHD. She said that he is without any doubt gifted and thinks he also has a light ADHD . She advised me to let him tested.

 

I know that he is gifted and advanced but it is very difficult to teach him.

 

Its like his head is full of thoughts and ideas. He has a very strong imagination. When jou give him instructions its like he doesn't hear you at all. It is because he is thinking about other things. When I ask him what's on his mind. He tells me very quick at least 10 things what he was thinking about .It can very from his new intentions he wishes to make and new stories he made up. In daily live DS also forgets instructions I need to repeat it to him a lot

 

He sometimes walks in circles while he is imagining new things. When I tell him not to do something DS doesn't hear me at all. He is the most active boy in our family but not that active as other ADHD kids which are not gifted which I have seen. My question is , is there a difference between a gifted and non gifted kid with Adhd? Are there parents here wth the same problem ? And how can I teach him the best . DS for example can't handle mathematics with manipulatives. When he sees them he will immediately imagine how to build them. I can't give math at that moment because his thoughts will stay there.

 

In my heart I feel that DS hasn't ADHD but I know he has something. He is very social and not shy at all so it can't be autism. He also talks the all day and loves to have people around him and share his new thoughts.

 

Thanks in advance,

Visitor

Edited July 25, 2016 by visitor

[Tumbatoo]

You just described my son! He was diagnosed ADHD and borderline autism by a psychologist at 5. He's also brilliant, and I haven't tested him for giftedness. I do plan for him to take the ACT this year (7th).

 

I started homeschooling him in 1st. In preK and kindy he was always in trouble for unlacing his shoes, wandering, or talking, but he could always answer the teacher's questions no matter what he was doing. I've learned there are best times a day to work with him. He likes to walk around to think and will talk constantly. I still let him dictate papers as he walks, but working on him taking over. Manipulates are a bust here too. All my kids think they are building blocks! Even when I read to him I have to pause and let him say what he's thinking, then resume lol. Now that he's older, I can give him his stack of work to do at his own pace. He'll still do two things at once and get distracted, but he is learning to redirect focus. We tried the recommended med, but it just made him sluggish and lose weight. Caffeine helps, so he drinks hit tea. Exercise also helps. We also try to let him exhaust his obsessions. I'm hoping for a useful one to come along soon :)

[TerriM]

My son was like that for a while--I often wondered if he was deaf because he would not even respond to his name.

 

First thing, it'll probably get better as he gets older.

 

Second, great that he's sharing his thoughts with you!  (Mine's pretty private.)

 

Third thing is that there are diet triggers to ADHD.  Artificial food colorings for one (http://www.healthychild.org/easy-steps/avoid-food-dyes-to-reduce-hyperactivity-and-adhd/), but you might look into sugar, caffeine, and wheat, and whether a probiotic would help (http://www.drperlmutter.com/probiotic-prevents-adhd-autism/).  Most non-organic wheat is treated with glyphosate which destroys gut bacteria, plus modern wheat was genetically modified in the 1960s, so there are multiple ways in which modern wheat products can cause gut and brain issues, but glyphosate is also used on soy products, so it's pretty pervasive.  

[JennW in SoCal]

He sometimes walks in circles while he is imagining new things. When I tell him not to do something DS doesn't hear me at all. He is the most active boy in our family but not that active as other ADHD kids which are not gifted which I have seen. My question is , is there a difference between a gifted and non gifted kid with Adhd? Are there parents here wth the same problem ? And how can I teach him the best . DS for example can't handle mathematics with manipulatives. When he sees them he will immediately imagine how to build them. I can't give math at that moment because his thoughts will stay there.

 

My adult ds still walks in circles when he is imagining new things! Yet I homeschooled him through high school, he made it through college and is gainfully employed in a job he loves, so do not despair!

 

There are different types of ADHD.  Most people picture an ADHD child as being hyperactive, constantly in motion and disruptive, but ADHD kids can also be less hyper but easily distracted children, the dreamers full of imagination and their own ideas. The actual disability can be very specific and very real -- a lack, for instance, of short term, working memory.  A gifted child with ADHD often is able to mask the worst symptoms, so the ADHD might look different, but the disability is still there, they really can struggle because of it.

 

So how did I homeschool a very distracted dreamer?  Well, I had to think outside the box, picture what kind of schooling suited him instead of trying to make him conform to the standard forms of schooling.

 

First of all, we used lots and lots of checklists. He could NEVER remember a list of instructions, so things either had to be given in short, finite commands, or written out as a check list.  Something as simple as "go upstairs and get your shoes out of the closet" never worked -- he'd forget why he had gone upstairs and start playing instead. Shoes were kept by the door to the garage!  We had lists of tasks taped to the bathroom mirror.  We used the clock quite a bit "in 15 minutes we are leaving. Look at the clock, when the big hand is on the 6 we are leaving."  I also used to pretend I was at NASA mission control when I needed to get through to him, saying "mission control to [child], mission control to [child], come in please".  It made him laugh and focus on me so I could then give him a clear, concise, short instruction.

 

School work was done in the most boring room in the house, with the dog banished to another room, with short lessons and me right there. By short, I mean no more than 15-20 minutes per subject.  If something didn't work, such as manipulatives we'd do something else.  I used a white board and bright markers through high school for math -- I'd write and he would dictate, and later he'd do the problems on the board. I had a big bouncy ball with a handle that he would bounce on while doing spelling or any oral work. In his teen years I had the computer where he could stand to type at it so he could pace around the house between sentences.  But I had to be next to him all the way through high school to help keep him on task.  As he got older checklists helped keep him on task -- he learned how to manage his time and how to rein in his over-active imagination.  

 

Formal school was a short part of the day, and done at the same time each day.  We'd do math and some spelling or handwriting in the morning, and the rest of the day was for building, drawing, creating and exploring.  Most of what he learned about history and science was through reading aloud, visiting museums and watching documentaries. 

 

I like the phrase "let him exhaust his obsessions."  I always harnessed whatever topic captured his imagination, whether dinosaurs or roller coasters, to cover all sorts of subjects from math and writing to history and science. It takes some effort and creativity but the end result of a well educated child is the same. In my son's case following his interests really paid off, because along the way one of those interests stuck and is now his career.

[bakpak]

Thanks for starting this thread. I too think my DD has the quiet (inattentive) ADHD, and I haven't had her formally tested yet, but it might come up soon as she's about to start public school. I'm thinking of trying some caffeine in the AM, but unsure what that really looks like and if a response is immediately obvious. I'd think you'd want to limit the sugar intake at the same time, and that seems tricky. I have no coffee or soda or caffeinated teas in the house, but could pick up something. Would a chocolate granola bar type thingie be sufficient?

 

I'm finding my lack of patience is the most challenging piece....I suspect my disapproval of her highly scattered behavior is not helping whatsoever.

[SierraNevada]

My son also needs to move constantly when his imagination is fired up. The only thing that I have found that works so far is exercise. Right before he needs to sit down and do seat work he needs to get in an equal amount of hard physical labor--Running/jogging, fast bike riding, aerobic work, etc. It does wonders for attention. If I skip it, (which I usually do in the interest of time, planning to do it after everything gets done) then little gets done. I'm just starting to clue into how this is the only way to focus his mind and body. I need the mindset that nothing in the day is as important as getting exercise in.

[visitor]

Thanks all, for your help. I clearly need to learn more about this matter. Could anyone recommend me good books for ADHD gifted kids?

 

I am going to change me teaching strategy :

 

- shorter lessons

- more movements during the day

- written or pictures organization chart

- shorter instructions

- no distractions during class time

 

I don't know if I could do more to help DS better.

 

Thanks all I really appreciate your support.

[bakpak]

All good ideas.

 

Also, a wobble seat REALLY helped my daughter focus for seat work. A stretchy band on the chair legs is another alternative that some folks find helpful. The book Smart But Scattered is very helpful with practical solutions to work on executive functions skills - maybe one of a kind on the market?  Reducing clutter/distractions is a big plus. Rewards-system might be effective (depending on effectiveness of the reward) for your child.

[Guest]

I have a gifted, add elementary aged kid.

 

I don't teach him his school subjects. I made some things non negotiable and he teaches himself

 

 

I taught him how to sit and listen. I taught him how to take turns in a conversation

I'm TRYING, now, to teach him how to not get steamrolled in social interactions (which he loves and gets very very excited for, to the point of not noticing when ppl are being mean to him.)

 

I help him be successful when he's wanting to do something but is having a hard time. I remind him to pee, to eat, to rest when he is hyper focussing...

 

I tried to teach him. It was a waste of our time. Though he was a super good sport about it.

 

I do make sure that while he is diving into advanced things, he also learns his times tables (and equivilant foundational info across subjects).

[eternalsummer]

I have a gifted, add elementary aged kid.

 

I don't teach him his school subjects. I made some things non negotiable and he teaches himself

 

 

I taught him how to sit and listen. I taught him how to take turns in a conversation

I'm TRYING, now, to teach him how to not get steamrolled in social interactions (which he loves and gets very very excited for, to the point of not noticing when ppl are being mean to him.)

 

I help him be successful when he's wanting to do something but is having a hard time. I remind him to pee, to eat, to rest when he is hyper focussing...

 

I tried to teach him. It was a waste of our time. Though he was a super good sport about it.

 

I do make sure that while he is diving into advanced things, he also learns his times tables (and equivilant foundational info across subjects).

 

Please update me when you figure out the bolded, or start a thread, or something.  DS has huge problems with this.  Breaks my heart.

[pinewarbler]

I have been impressed by books on giftedness by Dr. James T. Webb, and how he gets inside the heads of gifted kids. They are the reason I got through my kids' toddlerhood!!

 

Haven't read this one, but you might want to check it out? https://www.amazon.com/Misdiagnosis-Diagnoses-Gifted-Children-Adults/dp/0910707677/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1469971280&sr=8-1&keywords=dual+diagnosis+webb

 

Here's a quick article on Gifted Children and Misdiagnoses...

http://sengifted.org/archives/articles/misdiagnosis-and-dual-diagnosis-of-gifted-children

[wapiti]

Issues like ADHD can be pretty tough to sort out from general giftedness without formal evaluations that include IQ testing (which could show weaknesses in, say, processing speed or working memory - or not!).  Not-yet-6 is very young.  I'd locate a psych or neuropsych who has experience with 2e, adhd, and, at minimum, giftedness (in our area, a few local gifted schools identify testers on their websites under admissions).  I'd set up a time after the 6th birthday so that a WISC could be done, though the psych would hopefully chat about test selection with you before doing it, e.g. on the phone when you call for an appt or at some sort of intake appt.

[TerriM]

Is there an adult version of "Smart but Scattered?" :)

[AurieD]

Is there an adult version of "Smart but Scattered?" :)

 

Yes, 'The Smart but Scattered Guide to Success'. It's reasonably new and I have not read it yet so can't tell you anything about its quality.

[Targhee]

It was suggested to me by friends when DS was 3 or 4 that he had ADHD. I ignored them. It was suggested in public K he might have high functioning autism. I rebuffed that. But when DS was 7.5, I was having older sister evaluated (psyco-Ed eval) and while filling out the Conners index I thought to myself "oh my! DS has ADHD!" I had a naive idea about ADHD up to that point, and a lot of "learning" (breaking down old ideas and replacing them with healthier ones) to do.

 

He is in fact 2e, gifted and ADHD. Determining which exceptionality is at the root of a behavior is difficult. Some days his gifts shine bright, some days the quirky/asynchronous/OE parts are more obvious, and some days the ADHD seems to take over everything and I wish I could erase the day. But more accurately, these components of his nature interact, compliment, amplify, negate, or even enhance one another.

 

I do suggest an evaluation. It could be only giftedness. But even in that arena it's nice to know what you're working with. It could be 2e with ADHD. Or it could be something else neither you nor pediatrician has considered. Social interaction does not rule at ASD. Then there are SPD, CAPD, LDs, and a whole cadre of other things.

 

I actually have 3 kids who are 2e, and they are all different in many ways! Get an eval, be open-minded, knowledge is power.

[anabelneri]

Hello! I have ADHD, so chances are good that at least one of my kids does too. DH does not have it, but on the adult assessment questionnaires he is usually only a point away from having it.

 

We thought our eldest had ADHD when she was younger. Our plan was to wait until puberty to get a diagnoses and maybe start meds then, but when she was about 9yo she sort of "grew into" her brain. She became much more self-sufficient and stopped having focusing issues, and it's been fabulous ever since. Our middle child is currently 8yo, and seems to have ADHD, but again we're waiting until puberty before having it assessed. FWIW we know our kids are gifted.

 

Here's our list of what we do to try and manage the ADHDish symptoms without meds, since it's pretty tough to teach them without something helping.

1) Regular bedtime & wake up time

2) Go for a walk or run right after we get up

3) Breakfast with an emphasis on protein, served with green tea. I'd try to keep the breads/sugars low if I could. Generally we end up eating breakfast burritos since we all like them.

 

We start in on our academic work immediately after breakfast, usually math first.

 

I wouldn't worry about the manipulatives thing either. My eldest hated them with a passion; she couldn't be bothered with them. Only if she was really struggling with a concept would they help, but generally she learned the concepts by reading or hearing us explain. She didn't need the extra stuff.

 

One technique for teaching that I've found useful is to let them have something to fiddle with. Coloring, drawing, legos, dollhouse/Little People, clay, etc.

 

Books: I found Dr. Amen's book "Healing ADD" really helpful; it helps you figure out what type of ADD you're working with, and has info on supplements, etc. I also really really liked Dr. Hallowell's "Superparenting for ADD".

 

Good luck! Just know that you're not alone in the trenches. A bunch of us are right there with you.

:)

Anabel