SandraDumas Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I just want to vent. parenting is so exhausting. Between dealing with my mildly PDD son having fits because his peeper is uncomfortable, to my dh being away, to finding a 30.00 library audiobook CD completely broken, to telling my dc over and over again to clean their rooms, and train them to keep them clean, to losing all the ground I've instilled in them in keeping routines in one week of taking "off" from school and routines, to being short on money and having to cook every single last thing from scratch, not being able to afford cereal, or pre-made dinners, or stuffing or juice or anything like that, to training and training and training and training, to a girl that just got dropped in the midst of our church 9 months pregnant with nothing and no husband who needs our support and money (what money?) and on and on and on... There just is never a time, that I can relax, and every time I turn around another HUGE expense is at my door, there's an overdraft fee in the account, and two kids that need constant training and attention and have both their heads in the clouds and living in a townhome where I can't take them outside for one minute without fearing for their lives because people drive 40 MPH down our street, and condoms in the park... raising kids is just plain hard work, and being short on money makes it ten times harder and that's all there is to it. I am so thankful for so many things, especially my babies. But I just had no idea how hard this would be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A home for their hearts Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Just let me say I tottaly understand. I lot of the things you mentioned I am going through myself. I know how overwhelming it is. Sometimes I think, why do I bother! Nothing ever gets down, or stays clean when it is, the kids don't listen like I wish they would, there is no money in the bank, right now food and heat is considered a luxury I could go on and on. Life can just be plan hard. I heard something the other day that made a lot of sense, we need to learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. A lot of the things I've been telling my kids lately I need to tell myself. Life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you want, you need to be patient. God has a plan, and he knows where we are right now. I believe he will use it for good and there is a purpose for all of this. Hold strong dear girl, things will get better. One day I know I will look back on this period of my life not with saddness but with joy. I know I may not be very happy about it right now but I know going through all of this will help be a better woman, mom, and wife, and a better child of God. (((HUGS))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle T Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 ((((((Sandra)))))) Michelle T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Wisc Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 And when they need even more help than a 'normal' child (whatever that is), and other stressers are there...well, you wake to climb equivalent to Mt.Everest everyday. There are a few things that you must do. Meditiation, Bible reading, prayer, or time to listen to silence (yes, this can be done in a noisy house--we clear our noisy mind and listen for the depths of God). I sit in a big green chair and look out the window with my Bible in my lap. Make it a priority to get enough sleep. I know, I know. Little kids and sleep don't go together. Just try. Get some exercise: an exercise video from the library to do with you kids, a trampoline to jog on (and for the kids to wear themselves out on), weights to lift or stretches, walking up and down the stair case, jumping rope... A healthy diet and plenty of water (I know--a budget makes this hard, but it also makes it easier because you cannot spent you money on empty calories). A schedule--you know, something you never keep. LOL! Yet it is something that helps you strive to do the things that need to get done. Make one that works for you. You must have something in your day and week that makes you want to get up, something that makes you stop and remember how blessed you are, something that makes you laugh or smile. I spend my day looking for things that are beautiful--the pose of a cat, the cardinal in the bird feeder, the snow covered landscape. I ask for back rubs from my kids (even little ones can do this). I keep my camera within reach throughout the day and try to "catch" the beautiful moments (and then I share them with you on my blog :). Search for peace. Reach out to anything that brings joy. Fall in love with your children. Get so weary of "it all" that you drop the burdens on the floor in front of you decide to embrace life and live it to the fullest--to love and to cry and to be real... Being real...that means saying "no" when you cannot do it. That means saying you are sad or upset when you need to express yourself. That means laughing until your side aches when something hits your funny bone just because you have had too much---well just too much of everything. Reach out to others. Share the laughs and the pain. And know that there will be changes ahead. The end of the tunnel will appear at some point, and the little bit of light you can see waaaay doooown theeeere will suddenly be yours...and you will discover the worst is past. The days will be easier. The road will be more pleasant. It will come. Trust me. It moves beyond us faster than we think. It will not always be this way. Well--I need to do school. Blessings on the journey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelli in TN Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Your post just makes my heart hurt! If you lived in West Tennessee I would come pick up your kids and bring you a mocha and a hug. And then I would take your kids for a few hours and let you have a break. And I would feed them lunch at my house so that would be one less meal for you to worry about. It does sound so hard. It is so hard. My life is now easier than all that, but there was a time when life was so hard that I simply did not think I would survive. ((((Sandra))))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdWTMer Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 raising kids is just plain hard work, and being short on money makes it ten times harder and that's all there is to it. It is. I know of that which you speak! It's very hard when you have to stretch your money! Hang in there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Antonia Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Lifting you up, Sandra. If it helps to know you're not alone, I had a mini-meltdown this morning: sat in my rocker and cried for an hour due to many of the same things you're experiencing - frustration at not getting done what I want, not getting enough help from the kids, the sheer meanness of some people... I could go on, but you know. I actually felt a bit better after - sometimes a good cry really does help! Hang in there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tammyla Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Mothering is hard, but worth it. Hang in there. (((Hugs))) Kids get older and it gets easier. I'm not saying easy, but there wont be all the little kiddo messes and reasoning with an older child is less work. If your ds is uncomfortable, try to find something to help minimize that. Some kids are sensitive and need extra time, effort, & consideration as well as more patience from the grownups. This almost always fall to mom. Sorry your day has been so rough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs. Readsalot Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I had so many emtions in reading your post. I wish there was more than a cyber hug I could do to help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandraDumas Posted January 25, 2008 Author Share Posted January 25, 2008 I am more encouraged, and also have a game plan to not get so upset so many times next week. This week i was off my vitamins, routine, and normal diet and now I am feeling the effects of that considerably. It is hard but it could be oh, so much harder, and I needed to sit down and count my blessings, take my vitamins, and let the kids watch a movie. We are watching Mary Poppins for the first time- it's exactly what we all needed as a break! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue G in PA Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I know all too well how you feel b/c I've been there (AM there) too many times. It will get better. That sounds like a trite answer but it is true. This storm shall pass. I don't know what your faith is, but God knows where you are. He says He is never closer to us than during these times. Do you have a friend who can pray for you? I mean, we will all certainly be praying for you, but it really helps me to HEAR somebody praying for me. I have a friend whom I call on frequently b/c hearing her prayer for me always calms me down. I covet her prayers. Today, I called her and sobbed as she prayed for me. I know where you are. Parenting is hard (especially a special needs child) and doing it while dh is away is almost impossible (I've been there, too). Do you have a neighbor who can watch your kids so you can get out for a bit? I wish you were close to me here in PA. If you want someone to pray for you and I mean so you can hear...email me. I'd be happy to lift you up in prayer over the phone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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