Getting organized-I'm trying!

[rjperez1]

I have been trying for several years to get a grip on the organization issue. I'm great at organizing myself (was an only child), but when a husband was added (he's wonderful and tries really hard!), and then four little ones... Well, I've tried everything from Managers of Their Homes to Fly Lady to just winging it. Now I'm at the whip-cracking stage (myself mostly) :w00t:. I find that it definitely influences our ability to homeschool. We spend waaay too much time picking up in the morning and I am usually exhausted by the end of it. Sad thing is, when we're done there are still piles of laundry and piles of papers (some of which hide papers that we need). I can't tell if the problem starts in my head and manifests itself in my home, or starts in my home and gets to my head. Both I think. :glare: I know this: I can't focus to homeschool under these conditions. I have a high need for order (Only Child). There is another thread that discusses hired cleaners. We do that and it helps-but this is an organization problem, not a cleaning problem. It is also not a clutter problem- I just recently consigned 50 items, took a load to Goodwill and gave much of my infant stuff away to a dear friend. It could be a discipline problem or a time management problem. Sorry for the complaining. Anyone resonate?

Yikes! I posted on the wrong board! Sorry!

Edited February 7, 2009 by rjperez1
posted on wrong board

[Avila]

Completely.

 

I wasn't "born organized," to quote FlyLady. I swing wildly from doing well to not being able to let people in the door. Ugh. This is my biggest nemesis.

[Alana in Canada]

:seeya:

 

Yep. You're not alone. :tongue_smilie:

 

Can't help.

 

The worst of it is, I go CRAZY when I face a kitchen full of dirty dishes and can't find something for the upteenth time. School nearly came to a screeching halt today for my daughter because she misplaced her fancy-wancy purple pencil today. We still haven't found it!

[profmom]

It's tough to manage all that you do! I haven't mastered it either, but I work on it all the time too. Here are some random thoughts after reading your post:

 

 

~ Move your straightening the house time to after dinner or before bed so that the house is in order when everyone gets up and it's time to start school. Morning straightening could just be PJs, make beds, and clean up breakfast dishes.

 

~ You could do another pick up time before or after lunch, but set a limit so you don't take too much of your afternoon school time. This is just to make it easier to clean up later, not a full job. (Kind of like a snack takes the edge off hunger, but you still eat more at dinner. :) )

 

~ I don't know how old your kids are, but I've found that it's especially tough with little kids who need more help cleaning up after themselves. Here, I'm trying to keep my youngest's age in mind (4 next month), while also trying to figure out ways to limit the number of toys she has access to during the day. Ideally, she would choose a couple of toys, I would get them out and close the closet (with the doorknob cover that she can't open yet), and then we would trade them out for others later.

 

~ Limit paper as much as possible! For my youngest, I'm trying to enforce using the spiral-bound sketch books I have for her, and she has an aqua doodle. (She loves loose paper right now, though! Paper, scissors, & stickers.) I try to keep the older kids' school papers in binders or notebooks too. For me, I try to sort through mail as soon as possible, think before printing anything (do I really need this in paper form?), and only save important papers that can't be replaced. (This means that I throw away most bills after I pay them -- gasp! You could save them in an expandable file by month and throw them away months or a year from now, but I've found that I haven't needed them.)

 

~ Be strict with yourself about doing a load of laundry from start to finish every day. Start the load in the morning, fold at lunch, and call the kids to put everything away. Folding at the dryer (one load at a time) is much faster for me and then I never have clothes laying around the living room or on my bed.

 

~ A big thing for me is to make sure I have groceries for the week by Sunday at the latest. I make myself plan meals and make my grocery list during piano lessons on Thursday afternoons (not my favorite activity, but so worth it), and go to the store on Fridays while the kids are at co-op. (Sometimes I don't make it and end up going on Sunday, but it has to be done before the school week starts or I end up being stressed.)

 

Actually, making myself plan meals and shop is one of the most helpful things I do, and I'm trying to apply that strategy in other areas. It helps to have a specific time that you use for planning, like during piano lessons on Thursdays for me. (It's much harder for me in the summer when we break from lessons!)

 

~ What I'm working on right now is trying to make sure I'm prepared for the school week no later than Sunday night. We use TOG, so part of that is having the kids plan out their TOG work no later than the weekend too.

 

 

Well...I'm not sure if any of that fits you, but maybe something is helpful. It's a difficult task and sometimes we have to lower our standards a little to focus on higher priorities.

Edited February 7, 2009 by profmom

[Gretchen in NJ]

Completely.

 

I wasn't "born organized," to quote FlyLady. I swing wildly from doing well to not being able to let people in the door. Ugh. This is my biggest nemesis.

 

:iagree: I think you were describing me. Have you seen my house lately?:001_huh::lol:

[profmom]

I apologize if you weren't really looking for ideas right now! Sometimes I want someone to brainstorm with me, and other times I just want someone to listen and understand. KWIM? In the case of the latter, I'll just say that I can relate (and you can ignore the brainstorming)! ;)

Edited February 7, 2009 by profmom

[FO4UR]

I relate;)

 

My best advice is to not allow the kids into one room of the house (like master bedroom) so you have a place to go when everything else is chaos, unless you have a dh like mine who is as messy as the kids...:lol:

 

I keep my kids toys locked in a closet too - we bring out a box at a time.

[AnnetteB]

I was "born organized," but none of my family got that gene. :glare:

[usetoschool]

We have been on both sides of the coin - sometimes I was afraid the social services people would take my kids away because it was such a disaster at our house after babies were born! We pretty much have things under control now. A couple things that helped...

 

a place for everything and everything in its place

don't put it down, put it away

keep the love, lose the stuff

do it, do it now - it isn't going to be easier later

 

and we made a list of all, all, all the chores that ever need to be done and decided how often they needed to be done and made sure we did the daily ones every single day without fail.

 

Sometimes school didn't get done at our house because the house was so chaotic I had to clean before I could do anything else. :tongue_smilie:

[74Heaven]

I apologize if you weren't really looking for ideas right now! Sometimes I want someone to brainstorm with me, and other times I just want someone to listen and understand. KWIM? In the case of the latter, I'll just say that I can relate (and you can ignore the brainstorming)! ;)

 

thanks - i printed your ideas out - glad to browse this thread

lisa, schooling 5

[rjperez1]

I am so glad I stayed up a bit later last night to post! I'm sure I will use all of your advice in stride. It's an uphill battle, so it's nice to know I'm not the only one who is fighting the chaos. Thank you, profmom for all those helpful tidbits of wisdom. I'll be printing them along right along with Lisa. I enjoy having the encouragement and the practicality, just the same. :001_smile:

 

After reading your posts, I think that I will need to discipline myself a bit more to do the things I know I should (menu planning, groceries by the week's end). What I gather from you all is that some determination is necessary in my really troubled areas. My kids are young (ds8, ds6.5, dd3.5, ds19mo), so lowering the standards a bit is probably in order. However, I will no longer feel guiltyfor limiting their access to their toys and certain areas like you suggested, Paula, or expecting a bit of help on a regular basis.

"Keep the love, lose the stuff"-:iagree: I know this is going to ring in my ears from now on! What a great motto for homeschooling moms .

 

I remember reading in a Montessori Method book that children that have only one item or activity to focus on at a time will play more deeply than they would with many things around to distract their attention. Conversely, those who had too much in the environment would play in a more shallow way. So, "less is more!"

 

 

Alana in Canada, let me know if your daughter finds her fancy-wancy purple pencil. Maybe it is in the same place as my 8yo ds's pink fake teeth that he got from a church "Harvest Party" last October. Oh, I really thought he wouldn't notice they were gone!

Thanks for all of the great responses so far! Remember, this problem is muti-faceted, so don't hesitate to chime in with any other things that you think of! I'm all ears (eyes?). Blessings to all of you!

Edited February 8, 2009 by rjperez1
typo

[gracesteacher]

The friend that started me on my journey to homeschooling told me that in her house keeping in clean was part of their school work. If they learned really young how to get out what they need and put it back when done or doing the dishes then they learned how to be better students. They know they have a job to do and there is a reward when it is done.

She has several kids and has the younger kids that arent schooling yet dust the area's that they can with socks on their hands. Or clean the base boards. They are cleaning so mom has more time help the older students. The older kids vacuum and what not while she makes a meal. Everyone is responsible for the own items to get put away and it is on their responsibility chart. They learned a math lesson because they receive stickers for getting their jobs done and after so many stickers they receive so many coins then they have to put a percent to their church a percent to savings and they get to spend a percent. (I guess she would even be teaching fiscal responsibility)

[yslek]

I don't remember if it was on this board or another, but based on somebody's recommendation I recently read Organizing for Your Brain Type. Beyond giving me organization ideas, this book helped me to see:

 

why certain organization systems don't work for me at all and are probably a bad idea for me to even strive for (MOTH for example)

 

why dh gets irritated with my getting-the-house-clean schemes

 

why I get irritated with dh's approach to house cleaning

 

how dh and I can try to still function together in spite of our very different ways of functioning.

 

According to the book, the cerebral cortex is divided by fissures into four quadrants. We've all heard about left-brain vs. right brain, but someone who prefers to operate out of their right-front brain (termed "Innovators" by the author--this is what I am) is different in a number of ways from someone who prefers to operate out of their right-back brain (termed "Harmonizers" by the author--I'm pretty sure this is where the authors of Side-Tracked Home Executives would place.)

 

I highly recommend checking it out of your library. The same author has also written a book about children's brain types, and how to help them develop organizational skills that will work for them.

 

I'm still working on this myself, but now I think I have a good focus, and can weed through some of the advice I hear/read. All the best,