Please pat my hand and say "There there dear, it will all be OK"

[Jayne J]

Sigh. Today was our first, very first, day of homeschooling. We started late due to a new baby arriving on Sept 1. I was soo looking forward to this, I was all ready and organized and hoping to have a great start. But it ended up a huge mess, lots of tantrums and yelling (him, not me. Well, mostly him.) and we didn't even finish our modest first day schedule.

DS is 5, and we had done a sort of pre-school/craft time last year, so I figured this wouldn't be all that different, but wow was I wrong. DD 3 was content to do her workbooks/coloring books and play with the toys I had set aside--I really thought she was going to be the difficult one! DS gave me no end of complaining, refusing to do the work. The whole day was less than 2 hrs, so it's not excessive (is it?) but he just couldn't get it through his head that he had to do what I said, and not just draw/read/craft whatever he wanted to. He had tantrum after tantrum, and complained that he'd never get to learn about dinosaurs, even after I explained about all the other free time he has. (Dinos are his current obsession) We had talked about the rules during school, and I even included a 15 minute outside recess in the 2 hr "school day".

Am I doing something wrong? Is there just a learning curve I've got to get through? Please tell me it gets better!!!

[Mommy22alyns]

*warning - No Kidding Newbie here* :D

 

There's definitely a learning curve. I read that the first year of homeschooling (in particular) is a lot of "tossing and turning to get comfortable." You're learning and your son is learning. You may end up making a lot of adjustments - who knows? What do you have set up for him? He's so young - is there a way to incorporate his love of dinosaurs into what you want to teach him?

[Plucky]

What are you guys doing? For us kindergarten was optional (sounds frightening doesn't it? lol). Kindergarten was a lot of playing, learning to read when ready, learning to write letters when ready, learn age appropriate math when ready, and fun read alouds. It didn't take longer than an hour and some days it was shorter. He's only 5. Take it slow and have fun.

[Jayne J]

We are doing: Reading 20 min or so-- Just reviewing letter sounds and then picking up with OPGTTR later; Bible--5 min or so of me reading aloud; Copywork--three word sentences, one per day; Math--20 min or so counting and patterns; World cultures--30 min (this is the fun crafty subject, so the time is a little longer) Beginning the continents with Africa and planning on doing all sorts of reading, maps, crafts, games, cooking etc., and finally Read-aloud, 30 minutes--Starting with Old Mother West Wind and reading one story per day, and hoping to eventually work up to the full half hour.

I know that not everyday will fit the schedule exactly, so I don't really sweat the times, but use them as a guideline to help planning. Copywork is by his request--he likes to write real words and does it all the time on his own.

I spend tons of time with him reading about dinosaurs, watching videos about dinosaurs, playing toy dinosaurs, making dinosaurs out of clay, visiting museums full of dinosaur bones, paying late fees on overdue library books about dinosaurs, and wrapping my tongue around mile long dinosaur names (really, who named those things!!!??) so I'm thinking that his complaint was more excuse than serious grievance. (Can you tell I'm a bit tired of dinosaurs :tongue_smilie:)

 

What do you all think--is this too much? Am I expecting more than a Ker can do?

[Plucky]

Personally I'd just do reading, Bible, copywork (because he likes it), math, and a fun read aloud. I'd keep the lessons short 10-15 minutes. Then maybe you can add more time and more activities/subjects as the year progresses. You'd be amazed at the developmental jumps kids make halfway through the year. You're a great mom. You don't want to know what I put my first born through in kindergarten the first month. LOL

[Catherine]

the other two were in school for K. Honestly, it may not be popular here, but I was helped by the example of the wonderful K teacher my second ds had. She knew that having their hearts was the first big important step to teaching their minds. To that end, she made her expectations clear, and firm, *after* showing them she loved them and cared about them.

 

The way I translated this to homeschooling was to spend a lot of time with my 5 yo just talking, playing, telling him my hopes for him, and gently laying down expectations of his behavior during "school time". I made sure he was well-fed and rested, and tried to have my plans as concrete ahead of time as I could so that things could move quickly and smoothly. I also told him my expectations, verbally, as far as how long he would need to sit, etc.

 

I do think that K is an important time to lay down expectations for future school. I don't think it is unreasonable to make a child sit still for very short periods and pay attention, and do as they are told with a minimum of complaints. But, I think it is often necessary to do some preliminary work with an unwilling child, to get him up to speed in "bending him will" to yours, and sitting still, and paying attention. With my own ds, this took some time. In fact, we are continuing to work on it!

 

Best of luck. It takes time, and you have plenty!

[Heather in the Kootenays]

And it will. Someday you'll be laughing at your current worries. There's a learning curve and I think the first task on it (at least for me) is to relax.

 

Why not focus on dinos and work your other subjects around that until he gets into the swing of things?

[Denise in IN]

:grouphug: It will get better. Really! You have a tiny baby (that alone can throw a household into chaos!) and very young students.

 

I have found that "easing into" our schedule makes starting the school year much less painful. In your situation, I would start with just a few things, maybe about one hour of time (max). Take a few weeks to establish the routines and rules, then add the other subjects, one a week, until you are up to everything you want to do.

 

Hang in there - the first year or so is a big learning curve. You can do it!

[Quiver0f10]

It will get better! The first few days are hard. Just keep the lessons short and make sure you take plenty of breaks.

[JudoMom]

We are doing: Reading 20 min or so-- Just reviewing letter sounds and then picking up with OPGTTR later; Bible--5 min or so of me reading aloud; Copywork--three word sentences, one per day; Math--20 min or so counting and patterns; World cultures--30 min (this is the fun crafty subject, so the time is a little longer) Beginning the continents with Africa and planning on doing all sorts of reading, maps, crafts, games, cooking etc., and finally Read-aloud, 30 minutes--Starting with Old Mother West Wind and reading one story per day, and hoping to eventually work up to the full half hour.

I know that not everyday will fit the schedule exactly, so I don't really sweat the times, but use them as a guideline to help planning. Copywork is by his request--he likes to write real words and does it all the time on his own.

I spend tons of time with him reading about dinosaurs, watching videos about dinosaurs, playing toy dinosaurs, making dinosaurs out of clay, visiting museums full of dinosaur bones, paying late fees on overdue library books about dinosaurs, and wrapping my tongue around mile long dinosaur names (really, who named those things!!!??) so I'm thinking that his complaint was more excuse than serious grievance. (Can you tell I'm a bit tired of dinosaurs :tongue_smilie:)

 

What do you all think--is this too much? Am I expecting more than a Ker can do?

 

It will get better. I know you're sick of dinosaurs, but if you can work them in a bit to what you're doing (how about having him copy the names of his favorite dinosaurs? Using his toy dinosaurs as counters for math?) while you're teaching him that he has to do the work you ask for school that might help ease the transition.

 

K isn't optional here, but the days are short (1-2 hours maybe). The good news is that I found my oldest the hardest to acclimate to the idea of school because he didn't grow up to that age with school happening. The others, while they grumble at times, see school as something we do because they've watched their older brother(s) doing it regularly so they know complaining is mostly hopeless.

 

It will get better. You'll learn how/what/when to teach and he'll learn that he has to learn. Do remember that he's little, and try not to torture either one of you by expecting too much (like I did and sometimes still do).

[Sebastian (a lady)]

Sigh. Today was our first, very first, day of homeschooling. We started late due to a new baby arriving on Sept 1. I was soo looking forward to this, I was all ready and organized and hoping to have a great start. But it ended up a huge mess, lots of tantrums and yelling (him, not me. Well, mostly him.) and we didn't even finish our modest first day schedule.

DS is 5, and we had done a sort of pre-school/craft time last year, so I figured this wouldn't be all that different, but wow was I wrong. DD 3 was content to do her workbooks/coloring books and play with the toys I had set aside--I really thought she was going to be the difficult one! DS gave me no end of complaining, refusing to do the work. The whole day was less than 2 hrs, so it's not excessive (is it?) but he just couldn't get it through his head that he had to do what I said, and not just draw/read/craft whatever he wanted to. He had tantrum after tantrum, and complained that he'd never get to learn about dinosaurs, even after I explained about all the other free time he has. (Dinos are his current obsession) We had talked about the rules during school, and I even included a 15 minute outside recess in the 2 hr "school day".

Am I doing something wrong? Is there just a learning curve I've got to get through? Please tell me it gets better!!!

 

It's ok. It gets better.

It sounds like you have a nice gentle schedule. It sounds like you aren't expecting too much all at once. But it also sounds like ds hasn't made the mental transition that there are some things that aren't optional.

You will need to spend a lot of time at first teaching him what your expectations are and how he needs to meet them. Keep at it. There are days when we learned far more about heart issues than math or reading. The investment now is worth it down the line.

Love him, watch that you're not setting him up by starting something new when he's tired or hungry, but it is ok to be firm.

[WTMindy]

This first week you are just trying to get a little rhythm down. What you are teaching isn't nearly as important as the fact that there is a rhythm to the day. I agree with others that K is a time to have fun with learning, but I also think it is the time that you are setting habits and patterns that will go forward with you. I would tell him very clearly the schedule at the beginning of the day. Explain (again and again if needed) that there is a time to learn about disosaurs and a time to learn about letters and that there is plenty of time for both! I would do short lessons, but I would not quit because of a tantrum. I would have swift consequences for any yelling. If it takes all month to get him to do what you ask without throwing a tantrum, it is worth it all.

 

Do have fun. Do snuggle on the couch with good books. Do learn a lot about dinosaurs. Do go to the park and take nature walks. But, most of all, do set up a routine that includes learning and playing. A little work, a little play.

 

I'm sorry your day didn't go well. The homeschooling motto is that there is always tomorrow!

[iquilt]

That sounds like about what I expect of my dd4 (almost 5), but we don't do it all at once. She spreads it out over the morning with breaks on the computer (to play starfall or pbskids) and to play with her brother. When my oldest started K (2 years ago) she did all of that but again, spread out with snack breaks and lots of time for playing. HTH

[Jayne J]

Thank you all so much for all the comfort and hand patting. And the great advice. After a little decompression time and rest, I've gained a bit of perspective--I suppose it is possible that one bad day does not preclude college someday:D. And I also suppose that a 5 year old might need a little time to learn all the rules about how school works, and to get used to it. Maybe his teacher does too.

I'm going to go back into the trenches tomorrow, hopefully better armed and more patient than I was today. Again, thanks to all you veterans who gave me the reassurance I needed (probably wearing knowing grins the whole time!! :D I imagine we newbies can be entertaining at times!)

 

Deep breath... Onward.

[Heather in the Kootenays]

knowing grins??? No - more likely rueful smiles. I'm sure many of us recognize ourselves in your description.