Jennifer3141 Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 :iagree: That is the question. Does your reading or viewing material damage your relationship with your spouse? Many times, I find a black and white label not very beneficial. I took the god part out. That doesn't apply to us. But I would like to see someone really study this issue in HEALTHY marriages. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.Dup. Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 I think both romance novels and erotica are actually the opposite of porn. even though they are explicit, most "women's" books emphasize the emotional and relational component of sex. They tend to celebrate the individual (romanticised but clearly still human) hero. Most "men's" porn is specifically non-relational, non-emotional. The very last thing a man looking for porn wants is a real live woman with thoughts and memory preferences and a day behind her that she's still thinking about. He is looking for a body to project his own fantasies on to. There is plenty of writing out there observing how the young men that have been reared on internet porn are terminally self centered and incapable of actually acting as a generous lover to a woman. Reading harlequins may lead a woman to be dissatisfied with some part of her relationship, but it's probably not so much about his body, the size or shape of this or that. The things that typical women's erotic writing focuses on are good things that we all should want anyway ( a sensitive lover, a fulfilling relationship) To my mind "men's" porn is a whole different type of objectification,dehumanization and exploitation. So, so true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 But I would like to see someone really study this issue in HEALTHY marriages.Yes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In2why Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 I think they are exactly the same thing as porn. Just as some men become obsessed with the fantasy images presented in visual porn, some women become obsessed with the fantasy relationships presented in much "romance" fiction for women. Both can be damaging to real life relationships. That said, I do not think that all men are harmed by looking at porn, nor are all women harmed by reading smutty romance novels. :iagree: The real question is whether they take the place of an actual relationship, or support it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pdalley Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 That is the question. Does your reading or viewing material damage your relationship with your spouse or God? Many times, I find a black and white label not very beneficial. :iagree: And we have a very good marriage here. Despite my penchant for Jilly Cooper's Ruthsire Chronicles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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