jlmom Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 When you just didn't know what to do? My dd6 is throwing a monster tantrum because she doesn't want to go to gymnastics. I don't want to "give in" to her and let her stay home b/c I don't want her to think that this behavior is acceptable, but I can't literally hold her down and force her leotard onto her. Plus, what if there's a real reason she doesn't want to go? I'm at every class so I know there's nothing bad going on there, though. WWYD? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Josie Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 If she co-operates when you get there you can change the clothes. If she doesn't co-operate just have her watch and go home after the class. You win either way because you don't give in to her tantrums. I would make sure she isn't sick or injured before I did this, but if the issue is just being stubborn I would probably take her and see what happens. After she calms down I would talk to her to see if she wants to stop after you current committment expires. I would explain that you have already committed and owe the money, so you can't just stop right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Activities like that are optional here. I want them to enjoy their extracurricular activities. They are going for them, not for me. If they really don't want to go- they don't go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hedgehog Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 :iagree: with Josie. Take her anyway. If she's still tantrumming when you get there, put in some ear plugs and read a book in the car until her lesson time is up. Because if mama says we're going to gymnastics, then we go and we don't do anything else until the class time is up. I'm a mean mom, right.. however, it worked a treat with mine! :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coffeegal Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 If she co-operates when you get there you can change the clothes. If she doesn't co-operate just have her watch and go home after the class. You win either way because you don't give in to her tantrums. I would make sure she isn't sick or injured before I did this, but if the issue is just being stubborn I would probably take her and see what happens. After she calms down I would talk to her to see if she wants to stop after you current committment expires. I would explain that you have already committed and owe the money, so you can't just stop right now. :iagree: Another possiblility is exhaustion. I've found the monster tantrums usually happen when they're tired, and being put to bed is the best solution here. It makes it clear the fit was inappropriate, but also solves the real problem of exhaustion. Usually the child falls asleep within 15-20 min. of settling down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairProspects Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Did she choose the activity? If she did, did she understand the commitment involved? I'm all for teaching kids about sticking to your commitments, but if the parent chose the activity, I don't really think the lesson applies. Same if the child didn't understand what was involved in committing to it. I'm with Nancy too, extracurriculars are supposed to be fun - there are plenty of things we have to do in life as it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 (edited) For extracurricular activities : In my house if the child chose the activity, the child must finish the term. If a parent chooses the activity, then the child can quit during the term. Maybe she just doesn't like it. There are other sports. My kids all must do a physical activity, but they get to choose it. If they don't like what they chose they finish the season and pick something new. When we've signed up for year long things, my dc really understand the commitment and have stuck with it. Now, for some activities are viewed as nonnegotiatable. In my house swimming lessons are nonnegotiable (personal safety). In some homes music lessons are nonnegotiable. If that is the case with gymnastics, you may need to set up a reward systems or loss of privileges consequence to get her back on track. You should really consider if she just doesn't like it. There are many things out there to try. Edited February 8, 2011 by betty . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stacy in NJ Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I would have some understanding for not attending an activity if it's not a favorite, but tantrums at six are inexcusable. I wouldn't force her to go, but I would punish her for her misbehavior. I'd take away whatever privileges she enjoys (tv, toys) for the evening, letting her know this is the consequence for her behavior. I would pretty much force her to continue on with her class next time or until your current session is over. I'd let her choose whether or not she re-commits to another session or activity. I force my boys to participate in activites, but I let them choose the activity. I give them several options and let them pick the one or two that most interests them. Once committed too, we participate unitl it's over for the term/session. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 If she co-operates when you get there you can change the clothes. If she doesn't co-operate just have her watch and go home after the class. You win either way because you don't give in to her tantrums. I would make sure she isn't sick or injured before I did this, but if the issue is just being stubborn I would probably take her and see what happens. After she calms down I would talk to her to see if she wants to stop after you current committment expires. I would explain that you have already committed and owe the money, so you can't just stop right now. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.