Just need some support and encouragement...

[CAMom]

The application process is driving me bonkers! Why? Because my senior is procrastinating until the last possible second! He's planning on applying to 5 schools in the UC system and 2 schools in the Cal State system. All apps are due Nov. 30th which is less than a week away.

 

But...he's not been working on his essays at all! It's frustrating me because this kid is smart enough to do anything and he has really great test scores (2200 SAT, 800 Math 2 and 720 Bio M) but he's just not putting in any effort.

 

I asked him how much he wants from me with regards to pushing him to get it all done, etc. He says he doesn't want me to mention it again. He says he will come to me. So, I told him I would abide by that.

 

Knowing him, I'm concerned that he's not actually going to finish them. I've also told him that if he wants to just live at home for a year and work and go to community college that we're OK with that, too. He told me to quit saying that because it's not helping.

 

I guess I just need some support and encouragement through this process of letting go and letting him live with the consequences of his actions.:confused:

[cathmom]

:grouphug:

 

It's tough.

[Grace is Sufficient]

You are doing the right thing...

 

He's at the age where he must learn to motivate himself and manage his own time. Better to learn sooner than later.

 

Blessings,

Debbie

[In The Great White North]

You're not alone.

 

Ds clicked submit on an application at 11:57pm the day it was due. :glare:

 

The problem is that if you are contributing to his college tuition, you are the one who will pay for his procrastination. They are often willing to waive deadlines for admission, but not for scholarships.

[kiana]

Seriously, if he doesn't get his apps in on time or does a lower quality job and doesn't get accepted/doesn't get a scholarship as a result, what will the result be? Well, he'll have to postpone the 4-yr school and go to community college.

 

What will happen when he procrastinates in college and does a lower quality job/doesn't submit things on time? It will hurt his GPA, which follows you a lot further than where you did your freshman year. It's much better that he work on the consequences of procrastination *now*. You're doing the right thing by giving him the rope.

[Sonshine]

I feel for you - I have been in the same boat (read some of my past threads to get some encouragement from those who commiserated with and encouraged me) - it's maddening. Why they can't understand the importance of doing a good job on the essays, which usually involves starting at least a few days ahead of time, is beyond me. However, with your son being that smart he may be able to pull it off at the last minute.

 

I will say that my son did more when I left him alone and did not bug him about it - drives me nuts and reduced me to tears a few times. We are not footing the bill for his college education, but I still want him to get the best scholarships he can and save himself a ton of money. He hasn't completed the instate apps here either, but I can't say as I blame him as our instate schools are very stingy with scholarships.

 

If you are footing the bill, and have to make up financially what he doesn't get in the way of scholarships, you have a right to set up some consequences. However, it sounds as if these apps are for admissions only?

[Brilliant]

 

Knowing him, I'm concerned that he's not actually going to finish them. I've also told him that if he wants to just live at home for a year and work and go to community college that we're OK with that, too. He told me to quit saying that because it's not helping.

 

 

 

How's it going with one day left?

 

You also might want to point out to him at this last minute, that it would be 2 years at the CC for him to transfer out. (I think I remember that he's already taken some CC courses, but you do have to have the full 60 credits to transfer in to the state schools).

[CAMom]

How's it going with one day left?

 

You also might want to point out to him at this last minute, that it would be 2 years at the CC for him to transfer out. (I think I remember that he's already taken some CC courses, but you do have to have the full 60 credits to transfer in to the state schools).

 

Well, he finally submitted the UC apps last night at around 11:52pm. He came to me after 11:30pm to ask me to look over his essay and personal statement. He asked me how they sounded. I said, "Well, does it really matter? I mean, you can't change them now.";) And, frankly, they read like they were written at the last minute.

 

So, he squeaked in at the deadline for 2 Cal State schools and 5 UCs. Now we just wait. He applied by "examination only" to the UCs so we know he's guaranteed acceptance but not to the campuses of his choice. He'll likely get accepted to Riverside and Merced neither of which he is interested in attending.

 

You're right about him having taken some cc classes. He's taking 9 units this semester and is scheduled to take 8 next semester so he's got a start. At least the UCs have the transfer acceptance guarantee program if he ends up going that route. This whole process is going to be the death of me!:tongue_smilie:

 

Thanks for the encouragement everyone!