what says the hive? Quick, Hypothetical DH/MIL question...

[3lilreds in NC]

Haven't read all the replies, but I don't think there is ever a good way to "send her" to his mother. I will say that while I do not care for my MIL, I have learned a lot about cooking from her - indirectly, from observation. Not because I was "sent" to her to learn to cook or because she was trying to teach me.

 

If the kitchen is her domain she will learn by trial and error, like everyone else. :) Surely she has friends she can ask, and can read recipes! I think, if I were the prospective dh, I would stay out of it and let her figure it out for herself.

 

I think it would be fun for him to teach her, if SHE wanted him to be the instructor. I can also see, as a newlywed, how my pride would have interfered with having my husband teach ME what to do in MY kitchen. :lol:

[Guest RecumbentHeart]

I think it would be fun for him to teach her, if SHE wanted him to be the instructor. I can also see, as a newlywed, how my pride would have interfered with having my husband teach ME what to do in MY kitchen. :lol:

 

 

That would be me, too. I'm am growing in humility though ... give me a few more decades :p

 

Meanwhile, DH was telling me about some great teryachi chicken this friend cooked them for lunch one day and suggested I ask him how to do it since it seemed so quick and easy. I've humbled enough to learn a little something from my husband but from a bachelor friend? :glare: a couple weeks later he's telling him to give me his homemade laundry detergent recipe ... Yeah ... I'm absurdly proud and a little put off about DHs bachelor friend being more domestically knowledgable than I am after 6 years of marriage.

 

Anyway ... Total tangent... :lol:

[Guest mrsjamiesouth]

:iagree::iagree::iagree:

 

After nearly 20 years of marriage, my DH stills does most of the cooking because I am NOT a good cook. We would have had serious marriage troubles if he had suggested I learn cooking from his mom in our early marriage!

 

 

:iagree: My dh did suggest this when we first married and I was highly offended. My mother is midwestern and I was an army brat all over the country, but my dh is southern to the core. It is not that I cannot cook, it is that I cannot cook grease, fat, and deep-fried things. He says my cooking is too plain. I told him either eat it or go get his own meals.

 

On another level, I am not here to become his mama. I refuse to be his mother and insist on being a wife.

[AuntieM]

That reminds me of a story a friend tells. When he was first married he walked past his new wife as she was folding socks. He blurted out, "That's not how my mom does it." 20 years later he was still washing and folding his own socks LOL

:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

 

What a mine field. Methinks the new dh needs to invest in a really big secret stash of peanut butter and jelly.

[AuntieM]

Oh hey, what about grilling? That's a good sort of cooking for equal participation, compromising, and secretly teaching her a thing or two.

 

I know you can't grill *everything* but, when you can....

 

(And I realize this is hypothetical, just still thinking on it...)

[Guest RecumbentHeart]

Oh hey, what about grilling? That's a good sort of cooking for equal participation, compromising, and secretly teaching her a thing or two.

 

I know you can't grill *everything* but, when you can....

 

(And I realize this is hypothetical, just still thinking on it...)

 

My DH did tell him basically that he could grill without offending hypothetical wife.

 

Seems my DH has atleast learned a few things well about women in our years together :lol:

[Impish]

My MIL gave me several vegetarian/vegan cookbooks when we were first married.

 

Wolf threw them out. He LOATHES vegetarian/vegan cooking. We still have a few nights where there's no meat, but more than 2, and he starts to get twitchy.

 

MIL went through a lengthy phase of eating weeds. Dandelions, thistles, I don't know what all else. Wolf still hasn't gotten over that one. :lol:

[mommaduck]

My MIL gave me several vegetarian/vegan cookbooks when we were first married.

 

Wolf threw them out. He LOATHES vegetarian/vegan cooking. We still have a few nights where there's no meat, but more than 2, and he starts to get twitchy.

MIL went through a lengthy phase of eating weeds. Dandelions, thistles, I don't know what all else. Wolf still hasn't gotten over that one. :lol:

LOL! I have a friend like this. We'd go for a walk and she'd be grazing along the way.

[kmacnchs]

 

Update with s/o question: if this Dh knew how to cook, would it be better for him to offer to teach his bride himself? Or would that be just as offensive?

 

My dh taught me how to cook while we were dating (informally). I learn better from him than from anyone else. Of course, it depends on the sit. - if his mother was a person I admired (esp for her cooking) and wanted to spend quality time getting to know her, I would think I would LOVE to learn from her...this is NOT our situation however...

[Guest RecumbentHeart]

You ladies (and your stories) are so funny. :lol: this has been really helpful AND humorous.