Statistics to help open eyes....

[Guest cyndy40]

Can anyone direct me to some good solid numbers to show my husband regarding home schooling in general, home schooling an only, and socialization? My DD and I both want to home school. My DH is the hold up. He has worries about socialization for our only child if she is schooled in the home.

 

Any help will be greatly appreciated! The start of her private school looms very near in the future!

 

Cyndy40

[AHASRADA]

I was hoping someone more knowledgeable about the subject would reply, but since no one has yet, I will suggest that you visit the HSLDA website. They must have a link to the type of statistics you are looking for. I know the HSLDA Canada site does, right here http://www.hslda.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=60&Itemid=81

 

Also, this one from AtoZ Home'scool: http://homeschooling.gomilpitas.com/weblinks/research.htm

 

Not everything at this AtoZ link relates to what you're looking for, but keep scrolling down and you should find something.

 

HTH,

[hillfarm]

No stats, only personal anecdote. We have about the worst situation you could imagine regarding socialization. One child, live at the end of a dead-end rural road, no relatives near her age, and no other children her age for miles around. Plus we homeschool.

 

In spite of all that, dd (now 11) is very adept in social situations and we often receive compliments regarding her social skills and interaction with people of all ages, from peers to seniors to toddlers. My BIL is a ps teacher and has a Masters degree in psychology. He often comments on how well adjusted and well socialized dd is compared to the students in his school.

 

However, this did not happen by accident. Due to our situation, I have always been a bit more mindful of the socialization issue than most of our homeschool friends who have multiple children. Dd has always been involved in a few church activities for her age group. She joined Daisies/Brownies/Girl Scouts for a few years and has been in 4-H for 6 years. I try to make the extra effort to schedule a play date here or at someone else's house at least once every couple of weeks. Now that she has hit those "preteen" years, she seems to have a phone growing out of the side of her head and we allow a bit more phone time than we might have otherwise.

 

Other benefits, dd knows how to entertain herself. She knows how to spend quiet, down time without the endless distraction of others. She very definitely has a strong independent spirit and is not easily led into trouble by other kids. She and I are close and I like the person she is now and the one she is becoming.

 

All that said and she is not even at home this week. She decided that she would like to go to 4-H camp. I was concerned that perhaps she might not want to if her best friend couldn't go also, but she told me, "Mom, you're supposed to make new friends while you're there. I'll just meet some new kids and become friends with them."

 

One negative trend I have noticed in my area is that the ps kids seem to have a strong peer affiliation and are often uncomfortable interacting with others who are not the exact same age or grade as they are. It seems to be coming from the school, where they often pit the 3rd graders against the 4th graders in some such contest or whatever. Talk about unrealistic--I have never had a job where I worked with a crowd of same-aged peers nor are all my current friends the exact same age as I am. I don't think any of them are.

[MotherGoose]

Socialization was a concern for me too. My dd is 4, so I don't have a lot of experience with it, but meeting other homeschoolers (once you start looking, you'll find out how many there are), reading books (almost all homeschooling books mention socialization), and researching opportunities for social activities available to homeschooled children in your area might help. Figuring out all that helped us decide to do it. Also, as the other poster mentioned, ps is nothing like real life. And your child will be socialized, I think most people mean will they have friends, be able to interact with others, etc. But do you want your child to be socialized to the environment of the ps with the cliques and bullies and all that, or something more akin to real life.

[GoVanGogh]

I personally love this blog post re: socialization:

http://thepioneerwoman.com/homeschooling/2009/09/the-oldest-one-in-the-book/?cp=2

 

Mrs. G. isn’t sure when “socialization†became such an urgent and determining concern in shaping a child’s future, but she’s got to tell you, loud and clear, that she thinks the idea that a public school setting fosters a higher caliber, gold standard set of cultural skills, habits and norms is a used and tired bill of goods.

No doubt, the socialization question is the byproduct of not understanding that most homeschooled children aren’t spending their days chained to the kitchen table with their fourteen other siblings while their overbearing, oversheltering mothers drill them all day with grammar or math facts, making special efforts to assure they have no thoughts of their own. Mrs. G. can’t speak for all homeschooling mothers, but she has to tell you that along with the work they did at home and the planned and spontaneous field trips they took weekly, her kids took classes, volunteered at the Humane Society or food bank, played with friends, babysat, dogsat, lived at the library, glued things, grew things, the list is endless. At least once a month, Mrs. G. would stomp her foot and say, we are not going anywhere for two solid days. We need to get some stuff done around here! Mrs. G. had to occasionally curb socialization.

Mrs. G. isn’t sure when we decided that it was more important for kids to spend most of their time with their peers rather than society at large.

I homeschool an only child and totally agree with the above quotes. We hardly spend our days at home, chained to the kitchen table.

DS has taken a variety of classes outside the home: science, chess, music, P.E., art, etc We go to weekly park days. We do volunteer work. Last year, our homeschool Christmas party had ~120 children in attendance and we knew almost every single child!

And - yes - we are on the go so much that at times I have to stomp my foot and say we are staying home so we can actually HOMEschool!

 

If you are interested in a book, I highly recommend this one: The Well-Adjusted Child: The social benefits of homeschooling by Rachel Gathercole.

[....]

Bring your Hubby on over to our house! :D My unsocialized kids are constantly - and I mean constantly - being invited to birthday parties, sleepovers (actually, we're having a slumber party tonight :glare: and we have another homeschool family coming over tomorrow) and our doorbell rings like clockwork at 3:15 everyday. The neighbors' kids actually look out their window to watch for our minivan to pull into our driveway when we go somewhere...:glare:

 

I think the socialization argument seems like an Urban Legend... In fact, we had someone come up to us about a month ago and ask if we homeschool. After wondering if this lady was stalking us or something :tongue_smilie:, I asked, "Yes, why do you ask?" She said that we had some of the calmest and most well-mannered kids she's seen in her store. :D

 

As far as statistics, the HSLDA website is the only one I know of which has an abundance of stats and standardized test averages. I think it also has stats about how much money is spent per student versus how well they do on standardized testing. :001_huh:

 

Good luck with your husband! That was the No 1 obstacle for me, too. We did a "trial run" over the summer and just never went back. :tongue_smilie: Nor will we...ever again...:D

[....]

And - yes - we are on the go so much that at times I have to stomp my foot and say we are staying home so we can actually HOMEschool!.

 

I say this too! Too many activities - too much playing with friends - too much swimming. It's time for math, already! :biggrinjester:

[kalanamak]

Again, only a personal experience. Kiddo's only "class" is a twice a week, during the school year gym class. Other than that, he simply traipses along with Dad. This kid can talk to anybody. A woman I vaguely know, who clearly has "professional" plans for her kids, recently cornered me and wanted to know "what we did" that my son can start a conversation with any adult. I wanted to say "we didn't park him in a classroom where he can only speak if he raises a hand, and where his overwhelming companionship is other children, not adults" but I was politer.

 

E.g. when kiddo was 6 we were in an Oriental rug store, talking to the rather elderly owner. After a few minutes (and this was a Saturday mid-day) the man asked if he was homeschooled. I was stunned and asked how he knew. He said his grandkids were, and he thought so because my son 1) had no shyness about talking to a strange adult and 2) he was blatantly curious.

 

E.g. when kiddo was 5 we were in a hamburger joint in a rural area. We were right across from the local high school and the big football field. Again, it was a Saturday. A very nicely dressed older lady was having a milk shake and my son asked her, politely, about her pretty dress (I think it was "what is the name of that color of green"). After a bit she asked if I homeschooled. I was surprised and asked how she knew (I mean, I had just done K4 and K5!). She said she had been an English teacher at the school across the way, and had met kids who had been homeschooled some, and she said he reminded her of them. Again: unafraid and curious.